I squirmed, feeling the fire of my anger bursting inside. All I’d been through—all I’d suffered to get to this.
I wanted to yell, to scream, to run at him. And all this time—all this fucking time—he’d been the one who took my sisters. He’d been my enemy.
But the only thing that came out of my mouth, was a quiet, pitiful, “No.”
“Bring her forward,” he commanded.
“NO!” Rhyan roared, “fucking bastard!”
The two akadim holding me prisoner, hoisted me up by my arms, my feet dragging on the ground before they dropped me again at Aemon’s feet.
“I knew I didn’t fucking trust you,” Rhyan shouted, his face red.
Aemon ignored him, watching me carefully. He wore the stern, deadly face of the Ready, the face that had been so familiar to me. The face I had always trusted.
“You’re Moriel?” I demanded. “You’re the reincarnation!”
“As you are the reincarnation of Asherah, and just as before, I see you have broken your vows, forsworn yourself of your oath with your lover. It’s always the same. Every time. Every life. You never change. It’s always him. It’s always Auriel.”
My chest tightened. All the fears and anxieties I’d carried for months as my feelings for Rhyan grew deeper and deeper rose to the surface. All the time I’d spent hiding it from Aemon, fearing the punishments we’d receive if he ever knew. Worrying about betraying him, betraying his trust. Trying to bury my feelings. It had been for nothing.
He’d known before we did. It was all so clear in my head now. He’d made the choice to let Rhyan stay. To make us kashonim. He knew what we meant to each other—and he’d made it a punishment for us to be who we were, to feel how we were always destined to feel.
“You put us together,” I shouted. “You made us swear those oaths!”
Aemon shrugged. “Were you not well matched? Has he not taught you to fight like a warrior? Have you not killed my akadim as a result,” he snarled, his voice darkening. He leaned forward in his Seat, his hand reaching for the Valalumir, glowing warmer and brighter against my arms.
“I swear to the Gods, if you touch her,” Rhyan growled.
But Aemon fisted his hand and pulled back, not touching the crystal. Not touching me.
The ground shook beneath my feet, as the cave darkened. My heart jumped. And for a moment, the entire room seemed to shake, the torchlights flickering in and out. It was like the cave was going to collapse, like the walls were going to fall in. It was the same feeling I so often had during my panic attacks.
But this time…it wasn’t me. The room really was shaking. Like there was an earthquake.
“I wouldn’t worry about that,” Aemon said smoothly. “I’ve had a guest for some time. But now with the Valalumir present, I expect he’s preparing to leave as we speak.”
“And at what point might I prepare to leave?” I asked.
“When you hand over what I asked for.”
“And you’ll give me back my sisters?”
Aemon only stared at me. “I will release them from their imprisonment.”
“And me?” I asked, not trusting his wording. “Will I be free to go? Rhyan?”
“My lady, I agreed to your sisters for the shard. Anything further will require another negotiation.”
I sniffled, trying desperately to assess all the information I had. Rhyan and I were not going to walk free. Of that, I was sure. And if he honored our bargain, and released Meera and Morgana—what were the odds of them being released safely? Or the odds of me and Rhyan eventually escaping…unless…if Rhyan broke free from his ropes…we could travel. We had a chance.
I stared at Aemon’s face. The face I thought I could read—that had guided me, and protected me. Helped me make impossible choices when the Imperator threatened me.
Had taken over security for me and my sisters. Of course, he had. I remembered him specifically asking for it—to be in charge of their security. Not because he cared. But because he’d wanted to make it easy to reach them. He’d even given me time in the Shadow Stronghold. Time to call Rhyan. Time to escape. We’d done everything he’d wanted. We’d walked right into his trap.
“When did you know?” I asked. “When did you know who you were? Who I was?”
“I’ve always known about myself. I can’t recall a time I haven’t. A time I wasn’t aware of him, and his life. And I knew you the moment you were born.”