Page 13 of Eternal

I woke up in my apartment in Seattle when I was still in college. Mentally, I know I am dreaming, but I can’t control anything as I relive the painful memories. Tristan and I are cuddled on the couch, watching a movie I can’t decipher anymore when his hand starts to trail up my inner thigh. I recall this moment very well. It was when we had been dating for six months before everything became terrible.

“Tristan, stop. I’m trying to watch the movie.” I giggle, pushing his hand away.

I was still a virgin. I wasn’t ready to have sex with him yet, because I was naive to think that relationships should be based on more than just sex.

"What? I’m not doing anything,” Tristan replies playfully but keeps his hand firmly planted on the apex of my thigh.

He kisses my shoulder and starts to stroke my thigh more. I attempt to shift away from his touch as though to say no. He keeps me firmly planted where I am but kicks my leg out to spread them a little further. His hand moves from my thigh to cup the outside of my covered mound. His middle finger dances along the nub in an attempt to seduce me into sleeping with him.

“Tristan, enough.” I huff but make no other attempt to stop him. I was too scared to. There was a darkness in him that made me afraid of him. He might not have done anything to me at the time, but I knew deep down that he was capable of something heinous.

He pushes my shorts and panties to the side, rubbing and circling my clit, dipping his fingers into my vagina. My chest tightens, and I’m afraid to tell him to stop. Since I don’t say anything, he takes it as though I want it to happen, but my body language and gestures are screaming no. He groans in my ear and pumps a finger into my core.

“So fucking tight, Freya. Just imagine how it’ll feel when my cock is deep inside you.” He continues and inserts a second finger into me.

There’s a sharp pinch, and I groan at the feeling of pain spreading. I attempt to close my legs to get him to stop, but his other hand firmly grips my thigh, “Hold still, Freya. It’ll hurt worse if you keep moving. It should feel good. I just want you to feel good, Freya. This is all for you,” He whispers into my ear, and I feel a spark of fear run down my spine.

This does not feel good, and I do not want this to happen. I open my mouth to tell him to stop when he pulls both fingers out of me. There’s blood dripping down his fingers. He puts them into his mouth and groans, sucking on his fingers. “Fuck, you taste so good. I can’t wait any longer.” He lifts me and carries me to the bedroom.

He throws me onto the bed and starts to remove his clothing. He looks at me expectantly, but I can’t move. I am completely frozen in place. He shrugs and tugs off my shirt, shorts, and panties.

“Geez, Freya, lighten up a little bit. I’m not going to fuck you completely. Besides, you’re gonna like this a lot. I know you will.”

I can’t respond to the filth he whispers to me in the dark. I can’t see him as he crawls on top of me. His arms trapping and pinning me to the bed. I start to squirm and fight harder.

“Calm down, Freya. Just let me have a little taste of you.” He reaches one hand down and presses his tip to my entrance, and I jolt away from him.

“Ah, ah, ah, no, you stay right there. It’s going to feel good.”

“No, Tristan, I don’t want-” I whine.

“Shhhh, it’s just the tip. Nothing else.” Tristan puts a hand over my mouth and slides a little further into me, and it’s just the tip like he said.

Tristan groans over top of me, and my whole body freezes. He pulls back out and thrusts back in, but it's half his length this time. It’s no longer just the tip. Tears start streaming down my eyes, forcing me to stare at the ceiling. My whole body is going limp, and I just give in to this fate as his thrusts become deeper and faster. His groans ring in my ears, and I stare at the ceiling, and more tears slip out of my eyes. His final moan is louder, and his thrusts stop.

“Fuck, you felt so good, I couldn’t stop,” Tristan says above me.

He pulls out of me, looking down between my thighs. They’re caked in blood and a white substance. I close my legs and start to cry more.

“Why are you crying? You wanted it just as much as I did. You can admit it. It’ll feel better next time anyway.” Tristan starts to dress, and the nightmare repeats itself for the rest of the night.

I should have left when I had the opportunity.

Chapter five

Soren

Walkingawayfromhercrying figure has to be one of the most challenging things I’ve ever done. But my god, does she still look breathtaking while crying. I climb into my car and slam the door shut, taking off immediately so I don’t go back in there and comfort her. I don’t know if it’s the arrangement or my words that made her cry, but it leaves an unsettling feeling in the pit of my stomach.

I just had to do it.

I am not worthy of her love, or anyone’s love for that matter. She can never know that I lied to her at that very moment. It will only ever be her; I’ll give her anything she asks for, including a baby.

I shake my head, trying to draw the thoughts back. It’s be inappropriate for me to picture our futures so deeply, what our children would look like, how she looks when she comes on my cock, how it sounds when she says she loves me. I need to snap out of the trance she’s placed me under.

I pull into the garage of my apartment building, and park. I quickly climb out of my car and head to the elevator, watching as Abe's vehicle pulls into the garage. Entering my apartment, I go straight to my computer. I can dig further into who she is with her full name and address. The keys clack away as I imagine what she’s doing at this exact moment. Perhaps I’ll be lucky and be able to watch her nightly routine. As the security cameras open up, I watch her beautiful figure get undressed by her sister and tucked into bed. She’s still crying.

Going to her medical records, finding information on her height, weight, medical issues, her birth control, and the medications she takes. It comes up pretty much empty other than she has an IUD. Her transcripts and school records show she was an all-around straight-A student. But dropped out between her sophomore and junior year. I turn my attention back to her figure on the security cameras.