Page 56 of Eternal

I look up at the ceiling, coming to terms with what’s about to happen. It’s not necessarily that I don’t want it. I never imagined overstimulation would be a form of punishment; then again, I can see how it is. Suppose it’s better than the whips or chains I could be getting beat with right now. I look to Soren, who is now crawling onto the bed.

“Are you into the whole whips and chains thing too?” I ask.

“I can be if it is the appropriate time. This is not the appropriate time, though. I’m not sure if you’d like that anyway. It’s a much harsher punishment if we go down that road.” He is deadpan in his response.

Soren squirts lube onto the pink plug that has to be the size of a large baby carrot. His eyes flicker to me, and he sees I’m watching his every move.

“We are going to start small and work our way up. If we start too big, it’ll be nothing but excruciating for you, Freya. While it might seem as though this is all for me, it is also about your pleasure. We will work our way up to being able to take my cock. Just don’t expect it to happen immediately.” He pulls my legs up so my knees are bent and lifts my hips onto his thighs.

“Relax, baby.” He says as he inserts it into my ass. My eyes screw shut from the sensation. “You have to relax, Freya. It will hurt worse than it already does. Focus on my voice.”

I focus on his voice as he speaks. It just sounds like vibrations that soothe my soul. I relax a touch more, and he slides it all the way in. I exhale hard, and he looks back at me.

“You did good, baby. Now, shall we have some more fun?” He holds up the wand and presses it into my clit.

We lock eyes, and he waits a moment, then turns it on to the highest setting. I arch my back and groan at the feeling. Panting, I feel two of his fingers slip into me, and he pumps in and out hard and fast. The butt plug heightens everything in my body. All feelings and touches make me feel like I’m having an out-of-body experience. I scream out as my orgasm rips through me, and even though Soren knows I’m coming, he won’t relent. He keeps the vibrator pressed to my folds, and his fingers keep pumping in and out of me.

Another orgasm roars through me again, and as it does, he removes his fingers and quickly replaces them with his cock. I groan at the feeling, already extremely sensitive to all senses. My pussy gripping him, milking him for everything he’s worth. He keeps the vibrator in place as he thrusts, his pace quick and sharp. His other hand comes up and slaps my breasts. I let out another scream as my orgasm came through me again. This orgasm makes my body feel like it's on fire. I'm convinced he's lit a small fire in the pit of my stomach that explodes like an atomic bomb. Liquid squirting out of me and onto his pelvis. Soren smiles brightly and starts laughing. My mind is blank, only able to think of him, and desperate to keep going.

“That’s it, baby.” He mutters, and he, too, starts to chase his high.

Tears stream down my face as he doesn’t let up on me. A squeal comes from deep inside me, and another orgasm rips through me yet again. He groans above me, and I can feel his dick throbbing as he comes before removing the vibrator and collapsing.

A sob racks through my body, and I can’t help but start to cry. I feel humiliated, exhausted, and relieved. Soren lifts himself to look at me.

“Darling, you’re okay. Don’t cry. It’s done now.” He strokes my hair and presses a kiss on my forehead. “You did so well. Such a good girl.”

I feel him move to undo the cuffs restraining me and the butt plug still firmly in me. When he removes all of them, I curl into the fetal position on my side and start to bawl. Soren sits back, astounded that I am crying this hard.

“Baby, are you hurt?” He asks, placing a hand on my waist. When his hand connects to my body, I jerk away from him, throwing myself off the bed.

His eyes widened at my aggressive reaction to his touch. I keep going backward until I’m up against the wall. Soren keeps his distance from me as I continue to lose it. I sit there until he comes up and lifts me. I don’t fight his touch; I know he’s carrying me to the bathroom. I hear the bathtub water running, and he sets me on the edge of the counter, his hands reaching to grab my face.

“Freya, look at me. Are you okay?” Soren’s eyes search my face, analyzing for any sort of distress. And I am. It’s deep within my bones. But I can’t find the words to explain to him why I feel like this. My eyes meet his, and he visibly melts. “Jesus, Freya. You should have said something. I wouldn’t have-”

He cuts himself off as I shake my head. “I just feel humiliated. You have been so cold and distant since our honeymoon, and at the first opportunity to sleep with you, I took it. It’s shameful of me.” I take a deep breath before looking him in the eye, “And it’s shameful of you to treat me that way. How dare you be so hot and cold with me. You can’t treat me like a piece of shit most days and then fuck me harshly anytime you want. You don’t get to have a hold on my life like that, Soren.”

He closes his mouth, and I jump off the counter, getting into the bathtub that’s been treated with a bath bomb and bubbles. Soren looks down at me as I attempt to relax in the bathtub. I have a hard time with it, especially after he did seem worried about me. He steps in behind me and cradles me with his legs on either side, pulling me closer to him. The water soothes my aching body, but it only lasts a moment. I stiffen at his touch, not wanting to budge at our argument.

“You’re right, Freya. I’m sorry,” He whispers into my ear, his hands flattening on my stomach, drawing me closer to him if that’s even physically possible.

I pause for a moment pondering his words. We just had a mind-numbing fuck-fest, but he still doesn’t have the right to be so hot and cold with me. I can handle having several orgasms in a night, but I can’t handle being emotionally neglected like I have been. My parents and Tristan did that, and I’m not allowing anyone close enough to me anymore to let that happen.

I don’t respond to him, and he doesn’t say anything else. Slowly, I melt into his arms, and my mind starts to calm.

“I’m not going to say it’s okay because it’s not. But we aren’t going to do this halfway,” I say, turning to face him, but he doesn’t let me go. “We are going to be in this marriage either completely where you talk to me more often, we fuck, and you take me on dates. Or we are just roommates with no sex and only appear as a couple in the eyes of our families.” I break away from his grasp, allowing him to stew with that. I wrap a towel around me, and he’s still sitting there, just watching me. “The ball is in your court, Soren.”

Climbing into bed, my mind just continues to race.Will I be able to handle the rejection if he says we should just be roommates?I swallow a lump in my throat, trying to suppress the sob that wants to break free. I won’t. It is going to hurt like a motherfucker if he decides he can’t be anything slightly romantic with me. I’ve fallen for him too much, though I’m not sure if that’s the same Soren I fell in love with. The one at the beginning, where he tried, even if it was in his own weird ways. Then it dawns on me. I don’t know his history. I don’t know him enough to say he can even give me what I’m looking for.How can I truly love him?

The door creaks open, and light floods into the room, illuminating my silhouette. I feel eyes burning into me, and I know Soren is watching me. My skin flushes at everything we just did in the same bed, and with that, the lights are cut out. Soren climbs in behind me but doesn’t completely lie down. He lays on his side, elbow propped up, and begins to stroke my hair. He leans down and kisses my hair, cheek, and lips. I stay still, eyes closed, not moving.He thinks I’m sleeping.

“I might not be able to love you as you deserve, but I will do everything in my power to do so. You can’t just slip from my grasp that easily, Freya. Not without a fight, at least,” Soren whispers so quietly I have to strain to hear.

He kisses my forehead and lays down completely next to me, wrapping me in his arms.

The only thought my brain is stuck on is what he said.Does he love me?

Chapter twenty-four

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