Page 167 of Love Thy Brother
“I know.”
Embry regarded me with deep blue eyes that had no right to be so fucking wise. “You need help with addiction?”
“I don’t know that either.”
“How long have you been clean?”
“Since Rubi came to Porth Luck and threw my dealer in the sea.”
“That’s a while. How do you feel?”
“Distracted by other things. But it’s not going to be like that forever.”
Embry thought for a moment. Then he nodded. “You’re right. It might be worse when you’re happy. Sometimes it’s harder to be who you want to be when you have everything to lose.”
“I can’t lose him.”
“You won’t. That’s not what I meant. Listen, I’m not an addiction counsellor, but you can always talk to me. And I can find you a sponsor if you think that would help.”
“I don’t want to talk to someone I don’t know.”
“It would be someone in the club. MCs breed bad habits as much as prisons do. There’s plenty of brothers in recovery.”
I’d never thought about it. But I guessed that was why I was the dickhead with a spanner and not a fucking chaplain. “Thanks, man.”
Embry pressed a fist to my shoulder. “It’s my job.”
“What about the other thing?”
“The thing no one else knows about?”
“That’s the one.”
Embry’s smile lit up the damn world. “Soon, brother. Soon.”
EPILOGUE
Three months later
Rubi
Happy was a strange word. Not that I’d ever felt it. I’d laughed a lot in my life. At myself and everyone else. And I’d lived some good fucking days.
Weeks.
Months.
Even years. But I’d never opened my eyes in the morning and believed if this was all I’d ever have that I’d die content.
It still shocked me that I believed it now, butI was happy. Only two things truly bothered me.
One: Me and River hadn’t fucked since the morning before the stash house raid.
Two: These headaches, man. These clusterfucking arse-faced migraines. They kept battering me week in, week out, and I was fucking sick of it.
The Saturday after Lord Nashie’s thirty-third birthday, River left me in bed and went to work at the compound. I stayed home trying to vanquish the troll in my head.
I was sulking on the couch when Embry knocked on the door.
