Page 104 of The End of Me

“Mind if I ask about your fiancé?”

“I already told you that—”

“He’s overseas, and the information is classified,” I finish for her.

Even though it seems like she’s not lying, it’s also not the complete truth. The guy died, and she can’t move on. I wish I could confront her and tell her that he’s gone and I’m right here. I can’t though. I’m not in the market to be with a person who isn’t interested in grieving and moving on.

It sucks, but maybe I needed this. The confirmation that she’ll always be unattainable. Some people just can’t let the past go, and I can’t be the one trying to fix her—more so when she lives in denial and can’t see that she’s broken.

Piper glares at me. “Can we not bring him up again?”

“It’s unhealthy,” I point out.

“When he’s back, everyone will apologize for treating me like some crazy idiot who can’t handle the truth.”

“So, I’m not the only one who thinks you’re in denial?”

“Nope. But I know my truth though.”

“How?”

She takes my hand and sets my palm on top of her chest. If this wasn’t such a serious conversation, I’d be joking about getting to second base with her. “Close your eyes,” she orders.

“What am I doing?”

“Can you feel it?”

“Your heartbeat? Yes.”

“I memorized his, and I know when it’s beating normal, happy, and even or when he’s anxious.”

I open my eyes and stare at her. “Sorry if I can’t—”

“Believe it? It’s okay. I’ve known his beat since we were children. It’s a part of me.” She shrugs. “I would know if he was dead.”

I run my thumb across her soft cheek. She’s desperately clinging to a thin strand of hope, and there’s nothing I can do to help. I wish I had the power to fix this for her or at least drag her out of the fucking land of denial where she lives. “I wish I could make this better for you, Piper.”

She looks up at me through teary eyes and mumbles, “You actually do.”

I take her into my arms and hug her tightly, kissing the top of her head. She hugs me back, and I notice for the first time that she’s pressing her ear against my chest. Is she listening to my heart?

This woman is confusing, and as much as I don’t want to fall for her, I just keep loving her more and more.

“Let’s decide where we’re going to set up the practice and go home, okay?”

“Sometimes I wish things were different,” she mumbles. “If he were…”

And somehow, I understand the implication of what would happen if she was sure that her fiancé was dead. She would allow herself to love me. And fuck if I don’t hate the situation and maybe even the guy.

We arrivein New York around midnight with a laundry list of plans that includes creating a foundation. Piper’s vision for her professional future is overwhelming, but with the right people, she can attain all her goals. I want to be there for her and be her person.

I realized she didn’t need me or my money, but she could use more support than she wants to admit she needs.

“Do you want me to drop you off at your place, or are you spending the night at the practice?” I ask as we head toward my car.

“I should go home and try to sleep.”

“But you’re restless and don’t want to be alone?”

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