Page 6 of Brutal Knight

He’s not talking about fighting, or us. I know he can tell I’m pissed, frustrated. He’s talking about me. About how I have to let this out, or I’ll let it cloud my judgment and make me do something stupid.

Having my shortcomings pointed out by Finn has a bitter taste to it. I’d never say as much, and I know it’s not entirely true—I’m just annoyed and bitter about losing Willow.

But despite the fact that we each know we’ve got each other’s backs, I’m not really his brother. Not by blood.

I was adopted young. My father was a loyal captain to Callum—Finn, Aiden, and Lachlan’s father. He was steadfast to the end, doing everything and more for Callum. My mother died, too, gone far too soon. My entire family disappeared in what felt like the blink of an eye, and I was left with nothing.

Nothing but the O’Reilly family.

Callum was a good man. He knew how to foster trust in his men. He took me in, gave me a place in the family. I’ve always tried to live up to that gift.

I don’t feel like I’m succeeding at it right now.

Fucking up by losing the woman I’m supposed to marry is more than a mistake. It’s downright shameful.

I press my mouth shut to keep a curse off my tongue. Finn comes at me, but I’m ready. I move to get away from him, but he turns at the last second and lands a blow. It’s fast and sloppy, barely knocking me in the shoulder, but it makes something flare to life in me.

I should be doing better than this.

I knew when Dmitri died that Willow would be a vital puzzle piece. I knew she was damaged, knew she needed time. I also knew there wasn’t any time.

When I offered to step up and marry Willow, I did it to keep her safe as much as to secure her dead husband’s mafia organization, the Raven Syndicate, for the O’Reilly family.

I thought it was the right thing to do. I imagined that it would make Callum proud. But the truth is that Callum is gone, and I can’t tell if I can prove myself to a ghost.

I’m not going to stop trying, though.

We’ve all been searching for Willow for days. We have informants on the street, keeping an eye out, but there’s been nothing yet. No sightings, no movement. No indication of who has her, or if she’s even alive.

There’s a bitter taste in my mouth when I think of her being dead. I don’t want it to happen, can’t let it happen. She’s my responsibility. How could I have let her escape in the first place?

It’s not like Willow is in the best shape. Dmitri hasn’t been dead long, and I know he was keeping her hooked to keep her quiet. I’m not sure what her drug of choice was, but I can guess it was some kind of opiate. She always had the look of someone far away.

God. All I wanted was to do right, and I don’t even have the chance for that much.

Finn dances back as I push him farther, my hits landing on his chest. I can hear him curse under his breath. Normally, I’d hold back a little—especially when Finn is hungover. But it’s hard as hell to hold back today. I’m on edge, just like I know my brothers are.

We haven’t had much time to ourselves lately. First Rose came back into town, then Aiden decided to marry her. That whole mess took up most of our time.

Then our mother died.

Siobhan was Callum’s wife. She’d been in the hospital almost as long as he’d been dead, put there by some kind of cardiac arrest. Finn thought it was a broken heart. I knew it was probably the stress, the pain of our father’s death.

We all believed to some extent that she’d come back eventually. We wanted it to be true. We hoped that the universe would cut us a break, let us come back from loss just once.

That didn’t happen.

Siobhan died right before Aiden’s wedding. Then the wedding happened, then Dmitri.

There wasn’t time to mourn. Not really.

Fucking hell. Will we be burying Willow next?

I grit my teeth, forcing the thought from my mind.

I’ve known Willow for years, though only from a distance. I remember when she came into town to marry Dmitri and the way he gloated about his new wife. His pretty young thing, so trusting and wide-eyed.

I remember how Dmitri broke her down. I remember the first time she came to an event high, how confused she was, how Violet found her vomiting in the bathroom because the dose was too much for her. I was disgusted. How could any man do that? Not just to a woman, but to his own wife?

---