Page 51 of Make Me Swoon

“Why are you doing this? What the hell are you even doing with me?” I half scream and tears start to spill over onto my cheeks.

“What are you talking about?” he asks, looking concerned.

“You’ve got it all together. You’re successful and impressive, and I’m the exact opposite. I have nothing figured out and no plan for the rest of my life. I barely graduated high school, have no idea what I’m doing next week, let alone in five years. I don’t know how to cook, my savings account is at zero and I just don’t know what the hell you could see in me. You’re the whole package and me, well...” I trail off.

“None of that matters to me,” he insists, but I shake my head.

“It bothered your friends. None of them approved of me. None of them think that I’m good enough for you and I think that they’re right.”

“They’re wrong. I don’t even really like them all that much. We were friends in culinary school and we stayed in touch, but I don’t have anything in common with them besides cooking. I hated the way that they treated you on Saturday, and I was this close to kicking them out when you left. I’m sorry, I should have protected you from them, but they’re wrong. You are perfect for me. I love you. I don’t want anyone else. I don’t want someone like me. I pursued you, remember? I can decide what I deserve and what’s best for me and I want you. I need you. I love you, Lyla.”

“Why?” I ask with a cry, swiping at the tears.

“How could I not? You’re a total badass who does what makes her happy. I love your free spirit. I love that you aren’t afraid to make mistakes or admit that you don’t have everything figured out. So many people don’t have the guts to do that.”

“If you love someone, then you are supposed to want what’s best for them, even if it sucks for you, and I am not what’s best for you.”

“Shouldn’t I be the one to judge what’s best for me?” he demands.

“I’m just trying to put you first, Hudson. Please don’t make this harder than it has to be.”

“I loved you, Lyla. I’m in love with you. Just the way you are.”

I want to believe what he’s saying so bad, but I just can’t. Even my mom calls me a disappointment. Hudson just doesn’t know me well enough yet. Soon he will and he’ll regret saying all of this to me.

He studies my face and I can see when he accepts it.

“I love you, Lyla,” he says, stepping forward and cupping my face in his hands. “I’m complete by myself and so are you. Things are just better together.”

I bite my lip, not sure what I should say to that, but I guess I don’t have to.

“I love you, but until you realize just how awesome and incredible you are yourself, then I’ll never be able to change your mind,” he says as he kisses me slowly goodbye.

He pulls me close to him and I wrap my arms tight around his neck. I don’t want to let him go, but I have to.

“One day you’re going to realize how amazing you are and come back to me,” he whispers against my lips and I choke back a sob.

I hope that he’s right.

“Don’t take too long,” he whispers and I close my eyes, tears streaming down my face.

He kisses me once more, this time soft and over far too soon.

He pulls back, taking a few steps, and I close the back of my Jeep, heading for the driver’s seat. I only make it a few steps before I’m calling after him.

“Hudson! Wait!” I race up to him, staring into his dark green eyes. “I need a longer goodbye than that,” I whisper, throwing my arms around his neck.

“Me too,” he whispers, squeezing me tight to him.

I hug him, inhaling his masculine scent and trying to memorize it. I get the feeling that neither of us wants to let the other go, but I have to.

I let him go, stepping back and wiping the latest stream of tears from my face. We don’t say anything as we break apart this time. I take one last look at his handsome face before I turn and hop into my Jeep.

Backing up and driving out of Destiny Falls and over that bridge that I’ve loved looking at every day for the past few months feels like someone is stabbing me in the heart.

I can only hope that that feeling fades with time and miles.

EIGHTEEN

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