Page 146 of Fighting Mr. Knight

“You watched me torment myself. Did you know all along it wasn’t Wicks?”

I meet his unrelenting stare with wide eyes. Does he really believe I’m that much of a liar? “No Jack! I swear. You weren’t supposed to find out like this. I was going to tell you.”

“I wasn’t supposed to find out at all you mean?”

“I was scared. Iamscared. I didn’t know what to do. I asked Dad to go to the police. I wanted Dad to go himself.”

His eyes flare with fury I’ve never seen before. Fury directed atme.“How can I ever trust you after this?”

“But I love you,” I croak. “You love me.”

He stands to his full height, his dark eyes trained on me as his face contorts into a million different emotions.

“I don’t even know you.”

Taking the ring with him, he walks out.

“Wait!” I call after him, springing from the bed. “Please, Jack, wait!”

I follow him downstairs, tears streaming down my face.

“Please don’t leave,” I beg him as he shoves open the front door to the street. “Not like this. We can work through this.”

“Are you for fucking real? You don’t work through something like this.”

He covers his eyes with his hands as he tries to control his breathing.

People on the street watch us.

When he looks at me again, the haunted look on his face makes me sob uncontrollably and I don’t give a shit who’s watching the show, or the face I’ve got no shoes on.

Not even the person flashing the camera in our faces.

35

Bonnie

It’s a crisp Sunday morning. At eight, London hasn’t fully woken up yet, but I haven’t slept.

I thought running from my flat in Brixton to his house in Greenwich would calm me down and help me find a solution to this. That on my run I would find the words to make him forgive me.

But instead, I lost focus and ended up falling on my face, scraping my hands and knees. I shouldn’t be surprised since functioning as a human is difficult. I haven’t eaten or slept since Friday night when Jack stormed off. It’s been two days but feels like an eternity.

I would prefer to feel empty instead of full to the brim with this heart ache.

Yesterday I told Dad that Jack will go to the police. Dad’s in denial. Like I’ve been for weeks. He said they’ll never be able to pin it on him because a barmaid from ten years ago isn’t a reliable witness. I could hear the fear and anger in his voice though. So now the only two people that know about this shit show aren’t talking to me.

I’ve never felt so alone. I wish I could tell Mum, but I don’t know how she will react.

I ring the doorbell because I know he won’t answer his phone. He ignored all my texts and calls yesterday.

Today will be no different.

Lucy barks immediately in the back garden and the panic I tried to suppress during my run rises in my stomach.

Jack appears at the door, topless and drenched in sweat. He looks like he’s been boxing all night.

He stands rigid in the doorway, staring at me.