Page 27 of Alpha Daddy's Little Secret

I really do. Last night I dreamt we were hiking in the mountains of California. My parents were there too. It felt surreal.

“Courtney knows how to tap into your fears, Freddy. You didn’t gain a father until you were nine. Dustin’s about that age. The last thing you want to imagine is him growing up without you, a totally capable father who wants and loves him dearly. I think she’s hoping you act irrationally to all of this.”

“You know it, Braxton. She keeps pushing my buttons.”

My dad left my young mother stranded and pregnant with me. When he got word she was pregnant, he scoffed, spat at her, and stormed out of her life. My mother was about nineteen years old, and my dad was reportedly in his mid-thirties with a wife and kid someplace else. He had taken advantage of my mother, who used to work for my biological father’s parents. I’m not exactly certain as to what her occupation was. Still, I understand how she was deeply depressed after I was born. It burns my heart when I think about it. I feel like a piece of my mother’s shame will forever be within me.

I grab my bowling ball and head to the foul line at the top of our lane. Tossing my ball, I watch it pick up speedy momentum and smack all ten pins down.

“Strike!” Braxton calls out for me.

I smile. “It hurts, Braxton. I loved Courtney. And to imagine she’s tapping into my most broken spots to get a reaction is downright evil.”

It honestly hurts my head. I take a big exhale and reach for my beer.

“So…have you thought about asking Angela out?” Braxton reads my puzzled face and puts his finger up. “Hang on. Let me strike out first.” However, he settles for a spare.

I’m unsure how to tell him I’m not interested in Angela. I’m too intensely attached to Sadie. My god, I yearn for her sweet ass often. She brings me so much life that it helps me stay positive. Sometimes I feel like I’m here in Hillpike to share some joy with Sadie.

“She’s available. She came into my hardware store yesterday.”

Oh, great.

“I asked her if she’s seen you around town.”

“Oh, really. What did she say?”

I honestly don’t care, but I rather pretend than be honest with him. Any little bit of truth that I may say could develop into me telling him everything. And the last thing I want is to be face down in a bowling alley gutter if he found out about Sadie.

“Oh, the guy with the tattoos and icy blue eyes.” Braxton attempts to imitate a woman’s voice. I laugh as he continues his impression. “I’ve seen him around. What about him?”

“I told her you’re getting over a messy divorce,” he says, “and you need some distraction. She didn’t say much, but she did look very interested. Maybe you should shoot your shot.”

Angela is a pretty woman, but I’m too whipped by Sadie, who stole all my desire. Speaking of whom, I really want to pick her up tomorrow and have her stay with me again. I have a brief flash of our last lovemaking session where I took her in the shower. She’s such a firecracker, long and limber dynamite.

“Yea, maybe, I will.” I toss it out there.

“Sadie says she’s a good manager, and she’s kind to all the servers, including Sadie. Good to know she doesn’t have evil vibes like Courtney.”

All I know is that he brought Sadie up, and the sound of her name speeds up my heart. I take my bowling ball and make my way again to hit a strike.

“If it isn’t Big-City Freddy!”

I turn around to see my old Hillpike nemesis, Evan. He lived nearby while growing up and is sandwiched, in age, between Braxton and me. He’s got to be around forty-five and is now bald with the same long witch nose I used to tease him about. I only teased him because he was so deliberate about making sure I failed at anything I wanted to do. He had it out for me badly, and no one knew why.

“Evan?” I act surprised and try to greet him with a handshake, but he pulls me into a hug that I wasn’t expecting.

“Oh, man! I hear you have some relationship issues you’re sorting out.”

I glance at Braxton, who shrugs as he drinks his beer. Typical small-town banter will always find a way to dive into the lives of those who left it.

“Yes, I married a crazy woman, and now I’m paying for it.” I tease to lighten the conversation and hurry it along.

“Women, we really can’t live with them or without them.” Evan rolls his eyes.

“Are you here to join us or…”

“No, I saw you through the window. Had to hop in to say hi. It’s been over a decade since the last time I saw you here in town with your ex, right?”

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