Page 43 of Hot Doctor & Secret Baby

"Yeah," I agree, twirling my fingers in his hair. "Wow."

He laughs and then pulls me in close.

We lay in bed holding each other until we fall asleep. Once again, it's an amazing deep sleep. Only this time, I don't have to dream about Joshua or his body...because he's right here with me.

21

Joshua

"Shit!"

I shoot up in bed, rubbing my eyes. "What's wrong?"

"We fell asleep!" Vanessa panics. "Addy will be up any minute. What am I going to tell her?"

"About what?"

"About why you stayed the night!" she shrieks.

She flies out of the room before I can stop her to try and calm her down.

I wouldn't know how to calm her down anyway. I don't know the first thing about kids, and I've never dated a woman who had them. But obviously, me being around right now is a bad thing. I decide to trust Vanessa's judgment on it and climb out of bed to start getting dressed. I've snuck out of places to avoid getting caught by womens' husbands and boyfriends before - not my proudest moments. But surely the experience there will come in handy now.

Once all of my clothes are on, I head for the bedroom door and slowly open it to check and see if the coast is clear. No such luck. I hear voices, then see Vanessa standing in the hallway near the bathroom door.

"There's something I need to tell you," she says to Addy. "And I'm worried you won't like it.

Addy crosses her arms with a sly grin on her face. "Joshua stayed the night?"

Vanessa shifts nervously and tries to formulate a response. "The thing is, Addison…when two grown ups enjoy each other's company…and when they're attracted to each other–"

"Ew! Gross! Stop it, Aunt Vanessa. We're so not having this conversation right now," she hisses with a look of disgust. "Look, I get it. You like Joshua, so he stayed over. It's not a big deal."

"You're not mad?"

"I've never seen you go on a date or have a boyfriend. You've always been too busy taking care of me and working. But…you deserve to be happy. My mom would want you to find a good guy. I know she would."

Vanessa nods and smiles. "Yeah. I think you're right."

I step back into the bedroom, softly closing the door. My hands rake through my hair as I pace the room. This is getting real. I know I told Vanessa I'd be here for her no matter what, whether it was romantic or not…and I meant that. I plan on sticking to that promise. But with her niece in the picture, things could get messy if it doesn't work out between us. I don't want to hurt anyone again.

But can I really commit to her in the way she deserves? Can I be like a father figure to Addy if that's what it comes to?

The bedroom door opens, and I'm quick to plaster on a smile and try to act like everything is fine, like there aren't a million questions and doubts running through my mind. It's easy to do because when I look into her eyes, all of the unknowns seem to fade away. They're still there, it's just harder to care about them as I see her standing there in nothing but my t-shirt and the pair of boxers she borrowed from me. Her wavy brown hair is still all tousled from sleep and the things we did last night when we very much weren't sleeping. Her brown eyes look kind and gentle, matching the soft smile on her lips.

"It's okay," she sighs with relief. "You can stay. Addy actually seems pretty cool with all of this."

Part of me thinks I should make up an excuse to leave anyway. That's what I usually do, if I even stay the night at all. But usually…I'm not with Vanessa. It's different with her, especially now. Realizing how bad I hurt her also made me realize how much I loved her, how much I still love her.

"I think I got a pretty good handle on your kitchen while we were cleaning up last night," I tell her. "I'll go make us some breakfast and coffee."

"You don't have to do that."

I walk over and kiss her on the forehead. "I want to. You go get ready for work and let me handle the rest."

As I'm standing there in the kitchen, sipping my coffee, watching Vanessa and Addy talk and laugh over breakfast…Something strange comes over me. It's a feeling of calm I've never really felt before. It feels like I'm exactly where I belong.

I belong here with her…and with Addy too.

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