Page 67 of Of Songs and Silence

I throw up a rude gesture and he laughs, shutting the door behind him. A minute later, I find myself telling him the truth, just as I have since I was a child.

“If by fun, you mean hearing my own soulmate say she didn’t want to be with me, then sure.”

He gives me a disbelieving look. “Having heard Kala’s many and varied lustful thoughts about you, I have a hard time seeing that. Did she say she didn’t want to be with you?”

I think back to the specifics that I’ve been playing over again in my mind.

“She was angry that I told Lani we would be together…after, and she thought about how both the bond and I are controlling arseweeds.”

He scoffs, knowing full well that isn’t exactly what she said.

“Well, you are a controlling arseweed, but I happen to find it one of your more endearing qualities. And so does she—don’t pretend you haven’t heard her thoughts on the matter—though her sentiments lean in an entirely different direction than mine.” He smirks again before continuing in a more serious tone. “But you have to remember that she isn’t from here. She knows nothing about the bond. She has been given no choices, not before, and not now.”

I look away. We’ve both heard her thoughts about her life before, locked away in silence and promised to a man she hates. Is that what this feels like for her?

“No,” he says flatly. “And for seas’ sake, get your thoughts under control before you get us all killed. If I’m going to die for the cause, I’d rather it not be for the tantrum you’re throwing, at least.”

* * *

Kala is watchingthe games closely.

Kala.I repeat the title again. What had started as a way to distance myself from her, a way to keep her at arm’s length has now become an endearment.

Melodi.I test her name a little louder through our bond, trying to grab her attention.

It’s stupid. Selfish.Dangerous.

But it doesn’t matter since she’s doing a rather admirable job at locking me out of her mind. I can’t deny that it’s impressive how quickly she has learned to protect her thoughts. I only wish she had learned earlier—before I grew used to her voice in my head. Before I became addicted to it.Craved it.

Kala’ni Danica gives me a warning look and I realize that even though my shields are where they should be, my eyes are not.

I haven’t paid an ounce of attention to the battles. I couldn’t say who has won or lost, or even list the names of the current contenders. But I know how many times Kala’s fingers have twitched. How many times her long lashes have kissed her cheeks as she blinked.

The bond is angry and desperate, and it’s making me careless.

I can’t afford to take these risks now, not when we are so close to being free of Cepheus. Kane told me that Lani sent word that the rebels are to strike the day after tomorrow.

And I’ll be ready when they do.

It’s an effort to force my attention away from my soulmate and back on the arena, but I finally manage just in time for the next four contenders to be called.

Nino is one of them.

He glances up at Kala, and I have to remind myself that he is on our side, one of the many contingency plans we have in place in case the rebellion fails. My last line of defense to protect her from the others who would take her as their bride.

He would never force himself on her. She is safe from him, even if the bond tries to tell me otherwise.

It won’t come to that, though. In two days’ time, we will end this. The king’s reign of terror will be over and Melodi will be free to choose whatever life she wants. Even if it doesn’t include me.

And I will have to find a way to live with that.

CHAPTERFORTY-ONE

MELODI

Adozen more men are dead, and four winners are added to the ranks to fight another day.

I force myself to keep my shields in place all day, even though the pounding in my skull is beginning to make my eye twitch. As much as I hate that Ari was right to keep things from me, it takes everything I have to keep the king out of my mind, to keepthat wordfrom running through my head.

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