Page 46 of Bossy Mess

“Sirs,” I said, “give this one six to eight months. When it sells, you’ll be coming back here with champagne. I guarantee it.”

Of course, I couldn’t guarantee that. I only hoped that it would be enough time for them to completely forget about the property so I could unload it without their realizing it. And, if we did sell it at a loss, I could always come up with an excuse about unexpected market forces or something along those lines. Or maybe I’d just retire. I didn’t know. 6 - 8 months was a long enough time in the future that something would come up before then.

Neither of their faces indicated that they were buying it. I didn’t care so long as they left, and I could work on getting the ring off of me.

“We’ll keep an eye on the property and how you handle it,” Bob said. Jesse leaned over and whispered in his ear. Bob nodded. “Additionally, we’d like a detailed report of your plans in two weeks’ time, for our records.”

What they wanted was a paper trail. They wanted me to commit in writing so they could point to it when things failed.

“Sure thing, Bob,” I said. “I’ll get right on—”

I was interrupted by a knock at the door. I didn’t care who it was so long as they interrupted this tension from this meeting.

“Come on in,” I said. As they both turned towards the door, I grabbed the remote and held it close in my hand, underneath the desk.

The door opened and a woman came in. She was dressed in a smart suit and must have been in her sixties and carried a clipboard. I had no recollection of ever meeting her before.

“Can I help you?” I asked.

She looked at the two associates. “Bob, Jesse, good to see you both.” There was a friendliness to her demeanor that made her seem approachable, but both Bob and Jesse wore expressions of fear in her presence. She looked at me and extended her hand. “Mr. Hartford, I’m Elaine Reedy, from the Office Climate Council. I sent you an email a few weeks ago.”

I stood up and shook her hand, again adjusting my posture so as to not reveal the erection that hadn’t subsided even a centimeter.

“A pleasure, Ms. Reedy,” I said. As I sat back down, I squeezed the remote and enabled the vibration setting on the ring.

BUZZ BUZZ BUZZ

It was a soft, barely audible hum, but I could feel it. I could very much feel it. And, I had to hand it to Sloane — it felt good. Very good. But this was not the right time or place to be feeling that good.

“Well, I think we were just finishing up in here,” I said. “I’ll send that report right away.”

That was my signal for Bob and Jesse to leave and they took that signal, but Elaine put her hand on Jesse’s shoulder before he stood up.

“Actually, it’s good that I caught the two of you here, too. I think we should all talk.”

I wanted to appreciate how uncomfortable Bob and Jesse were, but it was difficult with the vibrations I couldn’t control in my pants. I wondered how long the battery would last on this thing — maybe it would just stop on its own. After all, I never gave it an initial charge. But it showed no sign of stopping. I tried searching for the off button on the remote without looking at it but feared that pressing a button might make the vibration more intense.

“Mr. Hartford,” Elaine said, “would you please grab me a chair?”

“Sure,” I said, then stood up, hunched over to try and grab one from outside the office.

“Why are you walking like that?” Bob asked.

Of course they’d notice — I wasn’t being subtle — but not walking fully upright was infinitely less embarrassing than them seeing my oscillating bulge.

“I pulled my back out earlier,” I said through gritted teeth.

“I’m sorry to hear that,” Elaine said. “I can grab my own chair.”

Thank God.

I sat back down, knocking the remote in the process and increasing the intensity of the vibrations. Now it was basically blasting my cock into outer space. I didn’t have a choice but to try turning it off at this point, but the vibrations made it hard to get a grip and I ended up dropping the remote to the floor, below the desk.

Elaine rolled a chair in from outside the office, closing the door behind her.

“My husband has back problems,” she said. “And he said lying on the floor does wonders for it.”

“I’ll try it as soon as I get home,” I said.

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