Page 16 of Leader

Behind me, Gus shifts and sighs deeply. “Cia, you know he’s right. She was his wife—”

“But she didn’t care about him,” I scream. “She doesn’t care about him or you. Why should we allow her to be there?”

It’s Liam that makes me see sense. “Because you can’t stop her, agápi. As powerful as you are, there are still things outside your control. This is one of them.” As much as I hate to admit how right he is, how right they all are, it’s the truth.

“Fine,” I say, giving in with a huff.

“Look at me, Nereid,” Kai demands, and my eyes snap to him. “Once we’re married, there’s nothing they can do. You’re out of Alexander’s control. You just need to be patient.”

The genuine wish to help that’s splayed all over Kai’s face thaws my anger, and I throw my arms around him. “Thank you,” I whisper into his chest.

Iblinkagainstthesharp light as we exit the car and rush to Kai’s private jet—correction, one of them. Or well, the only one that’s really his, I suppose. While Kairos Kronos has many, Kai Williams—his mother’s maiden name—only has one. He’s tried to explain it, and I should probably have listened more intently than I did.

Who cares, though? Liam, Cia, and Kai have planned our getaway, and all three have assured me it’s almost foolproof. What more can I ask for?

My chest feels as though it’s caving in on me, and my breathing changes into gasps. It still feels surreal that Dad isn’t with us anymore, that I will never again get to talk with him.

I never told him I love him, or that I’m beyond grateful for this life he’s given me. While my mom is a backstabbing bitch, my dad was ruthlessly fair—no pun intended. Why it took him dying for me to feel nothing but loathing for my mom, I’ll never know. I’m stupid like that, it seems.

Why the hell have I wasted time fighting for her? Caught between wanting to manipulate her, hate her, and loving her alike. What the fuck does that shit say about me?

Sure, some of what I’ve done was because the Kronos Society wanted me to gather intel, but did I really do my best? I shake my head at myself, forced to realize I let her get to me again. I allowed her to cast her web and drag me back in.

Fuck, I even turned my back on Cia… I… no, I can’t make myself think of what I did to her, how I treated her. Maybe if I close my eyes, I’ll wake up and find out this is all a cruel nightmare.

My legs feel heavy as I board the plane, heading straight for the back. “Sit anywhere you like,” Kai says, awkwardly patting my shoulder as he walks by me.

It’s both comforting and infuriating that he seems to understand me even though I haven’t said much. I know his dad is dead as well, so maybe it’s a kindred spirit thing. If I wasn’t such a colossal fuck up, and an even bigger coward, perhaps I would ask him and get some useful pointers. As it is, I only give him a tight smile while I slink towards the back.

I watch as Liam and Cia sit in the middle, and it aches to have her that far away. She’s my only family now, my lifeline. Well, she was before I cruelly cut the line in two, spitting on her love and her loyalty. Yeah, I’m a fucking treat.

Like a meerkat, Cia sits up straight and looks around, undoubtedly looking for me. When her eyes land on mine, the satisfaction I feel burns through the coldness inside me. As I wait to see what she does next, I lazily let the tip of my index finger run over the metal in my nipple.

Yeah, my cousin wasn’t kidding or exaggerating when she said—or hinted—at me losing my shit. I did. Big time.

While she and Abel were sleeping, entrusting me to keep watch, I grew desperate. All I felt was a numbness spreading through my body, and the lack of feelings scared me. So, somehow, my mind decided that piercing my own fucking nipple was a good idea.

Let me just tell you, it was fucking disappointing. I still didn’t feel anything. Not when I jammed the needle through the soft skin, or when I had to force one of Cia’s earrings through the smaller hole. At most, I felt a sting, but I think that was just wishful thinking. Of course, Cia freaked out. If I’d had the foresight to think of her reaction, it’s exactly what I would have expected. Her scolding me and shouting at me was right on target. It doesn’t matter, though. By some fucking weird miracle, Abel had a ring I could use, and the silver is now hanging from my nipple.

I’m so busy forcing my thoughts to stay on my fucking piercing that I don’t notice we’ve taken off until we’re in the air, ascending into the sky. Hmm, so Cia is still pissed… that has to be why she’s keeping her distance. It’s not like I blame her, I’ve not just hurt her, I’ve betrayed her. That’s why I was shocked when she asked me to be her consort again.

Despite her question, I’m smart enough to know what it meant. She may take me back on paper, but I have a lot of fucking groveling to do if I’m ever to hope to be let back into her bed. Even more to get back into her heart with no restrictions.

Yeah, I need to find a way to make that okay.

I force my eyes closed, not in the mood to watch the three of them not be miserable. Don’t get me wrong, I’m glad they can compartmentalize and laugh at the shapes of the clouds, but I also hate that they can do that. The jealousy I feel is like venom, and it’s only fueling my unhappiness.

“Are you sleeping, dickhead?” Liam startles me awake, and opening my eyes to see his face so close to mine doesn’t exactly slow down my racing heart.

“The fuck?” I mumble, wiping the sleep from my eyes.

I don’t know if Liam takes it as an invitation or if he’s just unbothered, either way, he sits down next to me. “I wanted to say I’m sorry about your dad. He was a good man.”

He isn’t wrong, and I appreciate the sentiment. But not the lump of emotions that’s taking residence in my throat. “Thanks,” I croak, looking away.

Liam feels like a stranger now. Like a stranger I know well, if that makes sense. Fuck it, who cares if it makes sense or not? It’s the truth.

“I take it you don’t want to talk about it?” Liam asks, keeping his eyes on me. I don’t look away, because frankly, I don’t trust he isn’t here to make good on his threat.

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