Page 5 of Pomegranates and Olive

"That doesn't count." I sigh and flop back on the floor in front of the computer. "I mean, I want to really travel; like you did, Ginny. I want to meet new people and have amazing adventures!"

My cousin Ginny moved overseas a few years ago and is currently living in Turkey with her smoking hot fiancé, Aydin. Theirs was a real whirlwind romance. She had one messy night with him in London before they were thrown together again in Istanbul, where they fell in love.

"My whole life, I've been the good girl. I've always done the right thing, the safe thing. Always colouring within the lines. I've never broken the law, never had that youthful foible. No one's ever had to be concerned about my immortal soul, that's for sure. I've never even stolen a packet of gum. I always vote. I give to charities, even when they hassle you on the street during your lunch break. I always wear my seat belt —"

"Well that's just sensible."

"I have dreams, you know. I have things I want to do."

"You're only 28."

"I'm 28 and I've never hiked to the top of a mountain or jumped off a cliff. I've never skinny dipped. I've never even had a speeding ticket, which just seems ridiculous to me now that I think about it. I've never had an orgasm. I've never even seen a Matthew McConaughey movie! Did you know that?"

"Wait! What?"

"Matthew McConaughey. Not even Magic Mike."

"We'll unpack that one later, Liv. I was referring to the orgasm."

"I've never had an orgasm." My face burns bright at my disclosing such private information. "At least I don't think so, anyway."

"You'd totally get off if you watched Magic Mike."

"Charming, Rosie."

"How is that possible? Luca's... Luca's..." Ginny looks like she's in shock as she tries to find the right words. "Does Luca even know?"

"Noooo! I like to think I'm a pretty good actress, and anyway, how do I tell him that I love him, but he just doesn't do it for me. It always starts off good, you know, and it builds and builds and then... nothing.” I throw my hands up in the air in frustration. “Don't get me wrong, he's got all the moves, but I just haven't gotten across the finish line."

"Maybe you're a lesbian."

"I'm not a lesbian, Rosie, I just haven't had an orgasm. The internet tells me it's perfectly normal."

"I... just... but... what about —" Ginny lowers her voice to a whisper, "— by yourself?"

"That's something else I haven't done!"

Ginger shouts into the computer. "Oh my God!"

Rosie falls back on the floor beside me and shouts at the ceiling. "Oh my God!"

"Oh my God!" I cover my face in my hands and moan. "I mean I have doneit, of course I have, I just haven't,you know!"

"Had an orgasm? Or masturbated?"

"I'm pretty sure she means both." Rosie leans towards the computer directing her words at Ginny. "Imagine spending your whole life with a guy and never having an orgasm, either with or without your guy."

"Imagine going your whole life without realising what a pain in my ass you are!"

"Rosalia! Give your sister a break, would you?" Ginny leans towards the camera. "Masturbation is perfectly normal, darling. There's no reason to be ashamed about it."

"I'm not. I just don't think I'm very good at it. And you guys know I love Luca. I mean... of course, I do... I must... I think... but then I wonder if this is it? Is this my whole life, now? An orgasm-less marriage, two point five kids and then death?"

"What you need to do is have a fling. Someone to get you across the line because once you've had the big O your entire life will change."

"What do you know about it?"

"I've been fully in charge of my own orgasms since I was a teenager!" Rosie announces proudly. "If it was an Olympic sport, I'd be a triple gold medallist and retired with a sponsorship deal from McDonalds by now."

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