Page 72 of Pomegranates and Olive

Under my tree is a wooden bench, big enough for two. Deniz must have put it there in the past few days. Engraved into the bench are the words “a reason to stay”.

I’m overcome with emotion but I can’t let Luca know the reason why. I take a couple of deep breaths to control myself and sit down beside Luca on my bench, the bench that Deniz had placed for me under my olive tree.

“Do you want to tell me what’s going on?”

“There’s a bench.”

Luca sits down beside me. “Okay.”

“My bench.”

“You’re not making any sense right now.”

"You know, this is my favourite spot in the whole world."

“Great view.”

“I love… it here… but not because of this… spectacular… view. It’s because… because…” I’m holding back sobs. I need to come clean about Deniz but I choke on my words. " I need to be honest with you."

Luca makes no comment but I can sense sudden tension between us.

"I don't know if I'll be ready to just walk away in three days, well, two and a half now."

"Because of Deniz?"

Shit!

Denial just isn't an option now.

"How?"

"It's not hard to catch the way you reacted when he got off the bus. But what really gave it away was when he told me he was with you last night."

"He what?"

"Straight up came over and introduced himself and told me that he hoped we could work through our problems despite the fact that you were with him at his house last night."

"Cazzo."

"I'm a big boy." He can't seem to look at me and gazes out at the horizon instead. "I appreciated his honesty, but it would have been easier to deal with if it had come from you."

"I’m sorry I didn’t tell you myself. You have every reason to be angry, but if I can –"

And then he snapped.

“Angry? You know what? I don’t want to hear your fucking excuses. I fucking came all this way to tell you I still love you but now I’m here and you’re here and I’m beginning to realise that perhaps its might not be love after all.” He leans his angry face closer to mine, his furious eyes blazing. “You think that prick really wants you? Do you think he has real feelings for you? You’re gullible and he’s treating you like the fool that you are. And now he’s preying on Rosie and will do exactly the same to her.”

"Excuse me?"

"Like you don’t know what I mean. He got what he wanted from you and he’s moved onto his next conquest."

But he didn’t get what he wanted from me… and I didn’t get what I desperately wanted from him.

“Let me just understand this…” I furrow my eyebrows in anger. "You're fine with him screwing me... which he didn't do by the way... but you're pissed off because he's flirting with your precious Rosalia?"

"He’s a user."

"Sure, you keep telling yourselfthat'sthe reason."

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