Page 10 of Mended Oath

When we arrive at the hotel, we wait in the car while Finn goes inside to get us rooms since they were supposed to be on a plane by now. I don’t want anyone to see me like this, a bloody mess and worn eyes. Declan takes me through the side door with the new room keys while Finn goes to pull the car around the back, assisting me in avoiding people.

He comes to a stop in front of two doors. “Here’s your room.” Declan hands me the key and I thank him softly. “Finn and I will be right next door. They’re adjoining, so if you need anything, just yell or knock on the middle door.”

Nodding, I gently take my bag from Finn and use the key to unlock the door. Pausing in the doorway, I look at the two of them. My heart swells in appreciation for everything they have done for me tonight, even if the union wasn’t pleasant. I just wish it could be like this all the time. My mind wishes that we could go back and never hold secrets again. Regrettably, time only goes forward, not back. “Thank you, for everything,” I whisper softly before slipping into the room and shutting the door behind me.

Chapter seven

Declan

AsIwatchthedoor close behind Natalia, I tighten the grip on my overnight bag. More than anything, I want to go in there and lay down with her to help soothe both of us. Although the physical contact earlier helped soothe my aching heart, it didn’t help to soothe my sense of loss. Finn can sense my unease because he lays his hand on my shoulder, then moves to open the door to our room. Following behind him like a zombie, I throw my bag onto the floor and sit down on the side of the bed with my head in my hands. The pang of guilt is still threatening to swallow me whole.

“I expected a lot of things to happen when we walked into her apartment,” I say after a minute, “but that was not one of them,” I say as the memory flashes through my mind.

Stepping off the elevator, the sound of a shrill scream comes barreling down the hall. Finn and I both try the door and knock like our lives depend on it. The screams from inside are still sounding, clear that she isn’t going to answer. Finn takes a solid step back, slamming his boot into the knob, and knocks the door down. What we see on the other side is both horrific and admirable.

She is sitting on Greyson’s chest, landing blow after blow to his face with hands and elbows. He is clearly dead, but she seems far too gone to tell. Her punches get harder, almost like she’s on autopilot. I’m not even sure if she knows that the screams are coming from her own mouth. I have never heard her scream like that before, not even when Dmitri died. It almost sounded like she’s blacked out, not even in her own mind.

Coming out of my frozen state, I rush inside and latch my arms around her chest, avoiding her swinging elbows by centimeters. I attempt to lift her off, but she keeps fighting. Getting another good grip on her, I use my body weight to yank her off his bloodied body. She flails like her life depends on it, swinging haphazardly around her.

"Mo ghrá. It's okay. I have you,” I mutter into her ear and almost instantly, I feel her body relax into mine, molding together like they used to. While I focus on her, Finn gets busy with the disposing of the body. I try like hell to hide the hurt every time she flinches away from my touch, but it’s difficult.

I know she was in fight-or-flight mode, so I don’t try to take it personally. Still, it really fucking hurts to see the love of my life acting as if she were afraid of me. The thought itself makes me want to kiss the pain away.

“Declan?” Finn questions, waving his hand around. Looking up at him as he leans against the doorframe of the bathroom, I raise an eyebrow. I hadn’t even noticed that he had left the room to change into his sweats and a t-shirt. I must have really been in my head.

“Yeah?”

“I asked if we were going home tomorrow?” He repeats his question, and I sigh.

“I don’t know. She wants me gone, but I don’twantto leave. I don’t think I can get my heart to leave her again.” I answer honestly, looking down at my hands. I sound like a little bitch, but I really don’t know if I can stand departing from her once more. The first time made me want to burn the world. Who knows what would happen a second time.

“We can figure it out tomorrow. It’s been a long night for everyone,” he tells me, taking off his watch and sitting it on the table under the TV.

“I agree.” I stand from the bed and grab my bag again, heading into the bathroom. When I walk inside I grab a change of clothes out of the bag and sit them on the counter. Turning on the shower, I wait for it to get warm before stepping in and letting the spray wash over me. The warm water subdues my nerves for a short period, just enough for a reprieve from life.

After a quick shower, I dry off before throwing my clothes on. When I walk out of the bathroom, I’m surprised to see Natalia sitting on my bed and Finn nowhere to be found. Stunned, I halt.

“Are you okay?” I ask her, making sure to keep my distance. I set my things on the ground outside the bathroom door, cautious.

“I asked Finn to switch rooms with me,” she mumbles, looking down at her hands. She wiggles her fingers, her hand a bit swollen still. I want to offer her something to help, but I don’t know how to right now. Just as I’m about to ask why she speaks again, “I don’t want to be alone.”

Before I know what’s happening, I’m moving across the room to stand in front of her. Her blue eyes follow my movements for a second, then drops her head to look at her lap. She’s freshly showered, and the scent of her familiar warm vanilla sugar body wash lingers in the air. The smell makes my body instantaneously relax.

My hand delicately cups her face, tilting her head up as my eyes find hers. Our eyes flicker between one another, taking in the proximity. All I want is to sweep her into my arms and never let her go. However, I’m following her lead on this. She just expressed to me yesterday that she needed space.

The feeling must be mutual as she leans into my touch and closes her eyes. When she pulls away, I frown. It quickly dissipates as she crawls into my bed, holding the covers back for me to climb in beside her.

“Just for tonight,” she whispers as I slip under the covers. Immediately, my arms wrap around her and she goes rigid. Once she realized what was happening, she relaxed and managed to press herself as close as possible to me. The soft sigh she releases makes my body hum in appreciation.

I kiss the top of her head, my one hand stroking her wet hair and twirling the bottom of the strands softly. She hums softly, wiggling a little further into me, tangling her legs with mine. My fingers on the other hand trail softly over her leg, small goosebumps. I know I should go to sleep, but I don’t want to miss a single second of her in my arms again. It’s been over six months since I’ve been able to see her, let alone have her tucked away with me in silent solace. Taking a deep breath, I relax into her more, molding our bodies to become one.

Natalia shifts, her blue eyes finding mine. She reaches up, placing her hand on the back of my head, fingers slipping into my hair. Pulling my face closer to hers, she leans forward, pressing her lips to mine. My first instinct is to pull her as close as humanly possible, and lose myself in her, but I know this is not what she needs right now.

“Nat,” I warn, pulling away from the kiss.

“Declan, please,” she whispers, resting her forehead on my chest, her fingertips skating over my skin, down my side, and to the top of my shorts. My hand shoots down to hers, lightly gripping her wrist.

“We shouldn’t.” My eyes close momentarily as I fight with myself internally. When they reopen, she’s looking at me.