Page 16 of Resisting Temptation (Men of Honor 3)
Oh god.
His lips are warm, firm and demanding. It takes me no time to respond. Wrapping my legs around his lean waist, I thread my fingers in his dark hair and grip the wet strands tightly before kissing him back like I have been dying to do, since the day I first laid eyes on him. His groan vibrates against my lips and his tongue slips into my mouth. Warmth explodes through my body, spreading right to the tips of my fingers and toes. My heart skips a beat and time stands still. Our tongues slide together in perfect harmony, and even though it’s all new, it feels like we have been doing it our whole lives. It feels right. At this exact moment I know, without a shadow of a doubt, that I am having ‘the kiss’. The one I’ve been waiting for my whole life. One I will remember forever.
Minutes, seconds, hours… I have no idea how much time passes when he pulls back. Inhaling lungfuls of much needed air I slowly open my eyes, and collide with his fierce gaze. “Do you hear that, Walker?” I whisper with a smile.
His eyes narrow in confusion. “Hear what?”
“Silence.”
Recognition registers in his eyes, knowing what I’m saying. “That’s because it is silent, Red. We are the only two here.” I burst out laughing and a smile tugs at his lips.
“Shhh. Don’t ruin the moment, just go with it,” I whisper teasingly before attacking his sexy mouth again.
With a low growl, he grips my wet hair with one hand and wraps it around his fist, ending my control. I whimper against his mouth and begin to grind myself against him, desperately craving more of him.
All too soon he’s pulling away again. “Shit! What the fuck are we doing, Red?”
My eyes snap open at the torment in his voice, and even though his eyes blaze with an undeniable need, I also see a war rage in their depths. Our chests heave rapidly for breath as he waits for me to answer. “I’m hoping we are about to do something that I haven’t been able to stop thinking about since meeting you.”
His jaw flexes as he stares at me with hesitancy and questions. I know what he’s going to ask before he even says it. “Have you ever done this before, Faith?”
My cheeks heat embarrassingly and I take a moment to respond. I softly shake my head and my answer seems to escalate whatever battle he has going on inside of him. “I meant what I said, Cade. I know where you stand and I don’t expect any promises.”
“That’s just it. Why the hell not? Why do you want to give yourself to some fucked-up asshole who can’t give you promises? Is this really how you want your first time to be?”
Knowing I have nothing left to lose, I decide to opt for the truth and pour my heart out to him. “I’m still a virgin because I haven’t met anyone yet that I’ve wanted to do this with… until now. I’m sorry if you don’t want to hear this but it’s the truth. I’ve never felt this way about someone before and, if I’m being completely honest right now, I’m absolutely terrified I never will again. Which is why if one night is all I can have from you, then I will take it. Because I know having you for one night will be better than not having you at all.”
His breathing speeds up and I swear I can hear his teeth grind with restraint. He shakes his head before dropping it to my shoulder, fighting with whatever internal struggle he has going on.
Holding him close, I kiss the side of his face and keep my lips close to his ear, “Tell me that you don’t feel this, Cade. Tell me you don’t want this just as much as me.”
“Jesus, of course I want you. I want you more than my next fucking breath.”
“Then take me. I’m right here.” He shakes his head again. “What are you so afraid of?” I feel him tense but I keep him close and will him to talk to me.
“I’m not scared.”
“Then what is it? Talk to me, please.”
“I don’t know how to fucking do this, all right!” he snaps, before bringing his turbulent gaze to mine. “I told you I fuck, that’s all I know, and you deserve more than that, you fucking deserve more than me.”
My heart clenches painfully at his tortured admission. “I don’t want you to be someone you’re not. I just want you, no matter what way that is.” His only response is to stare at me, and I finally realize this is not going to happen.
Swallowing back my disappointment, I let out a defeated breath and gently rest my forehead on his. “Okay. It’s okay.” I’m not sure if those words are for him or me. “I want you more than you will ever know, but I won’t beg. The last thing I want is for you to regret any of this in the morning. It would kill me.” My voice cracks with emotion and my eyes fall closed when I feel the sting of tears coming on.
“Jesus, Faith, it’s not me who’s going to regret this in the morning, it’s you.” I shake my head, not knowing what else I can say to make him realize how much I want this… how much I want him. “You know what? Fuck it!”
My eyes snap open, and I’m just about to ask what he means when I’m tossed on the small single bed, that can surprisingly accommodate a man his size. Once again I have no time to register what’s happening before he’s on top of me, his hard body crushing me into the mattress as he takes my mouth in a searing kiss.
Sweet victory washes over me and heat reignites in my body. I wrap my arms and legs around his powerful body and trap him to me; scared he will pull back again if I don’t.
