Page 92 of Dearest Protector

Ben moved closer, so close that I couldn’t have escaped inside if I wanted to, and I wasn’t sure that I wanted to move away.

He reached into his pocket and pulled out what looked like a piece of paper.

I only realized that it was the check I’d sent him when he held it out for me to take.

“You know I’m never going to cash this,” he said, his expression troubled. “Take it back.”

I shook my head adamantly. “I never meant to hurt you by sending that. I guess I wanted you to know that I didn’t need to lean on you anymore financially. That I could stand on my own two feet. Maybe what I really wanted was a clean slate. I don’t want you for your money, Ben. I never have.”

He put the check back in his pocket, his eyes much warmer. “I never thought, not even once, that you wanted my money, Ariel. Anything I ever did for you was done strictly because I wanted to make your life easier. I’ll still never cash this, but I’ll hang onto it for now if that’s what you need from me. Hell, if this is what it takes for the two of us to be together, I’ll frame it and hang it on my goddamn wall.”

My heart ached as I realized just how much Ben was willing to do to make me happy. It wasn’t really in his nature to take no for an answer, but he didn’t try to cajole me to get his way.

I sighed. “I’m trying to leave that old life behind me, Ben. The accident is over. The pain of my injuries is done now that the hardware is out of my foot. My struggles are part of my past, and instead of waiting for the other shoe to drop, I want to live my life without regrets. I’ve lived most of my life being told exactly what to do, which was essentially nothing unless it involved dancing. What I could eat. What time to sleep. What I could wear. What I should do with any free time I had, which always involved dance obligations. Now that my life doesn’t revolve around dancing, I’ve been trying to figure out what I want and who I really am. Maybe that sounds a little crazy—”

“It doesn’t,” Ben said as he placed his hands gently on my bare shoulders. “I get it. All I’ve really wanted was for you to feel like you’re free of that prison, Ariel. To figure out that you’re still just as amazing as you’ve always been, even if dancingisn’tin that equation.”

Tears welled up in my eyes as I looked up at him and nodded. “I’m figuring out that I really am enough, no matter what I do and who I choose to be. I’ve never felt this way before, but it’s kind of…powerful.”

He nodded like he’d known that I’d find myself all along. “You’re not just powerful. You’re extraordinary. You always have been. You just never saw it.”

I lifted my hand and stroked his jawline. “So are you. The most extraordinary man I’ve ever met. I overreacted when you told me the truth, Ben. I realize that now. I should have appreciated the fact that you struggled with that decision because you gave a damn aboutme. Maybe it wasn’t right to lie or hold back the truth about something that important, and it probably wasn’t the best decision you’ve ever made, but you have so much integrity that in the end, youhadto tell me. You could have said nothing, and I never would have known. Everything had just happened so fast for us that I was confused. I think expecting perfection from someone you care about is totally unfair. I wouldn’t be where I am right now if it wasn’t for you. Please, just don’t ever lie to me again or hold back on something important that I should know. You don’t have to. I can handle the truth about anything now.”

“I won’t,” he vowed huskily. “Nothing about us was ever a lie, Ariel.”

My hand was shaking as I rested it on his chest. “I know.”

He stepped even closer and threaded his hand through my curls. “I can’t go back and do things all over again, but I like the idea of that clean slate. I’m not going to press for more right now, but if we do end up together, I’m always going to be protective, and probably possessive. I just want to put that out there right now. And you will never, ever, be able to pay or pay me back for anything I give you. Those are things you should probably know upfront. If you can’t live with that, you better say so right now. Otherwise, we move forward and figure this out as we go along.”

A tremulous smile formed on my lips.

Ben was always going to be…Ben.

I wouldn’t love him so much it hurt if he wasn’t a protector by nature. I adored that man.

It was lies that I couldn’t handle, and I totally believed that he’d never do something like that again.

He’d been backed into a corner, and everything that had happened between us was because he…cared.

I could live with his protectiveness and his possessiveness. I knew him well enough to know that he’d try to compromise if I thought he was being completely overbearing.

Could I deal with the fact that he’d never let me pay for anything?

Maybe.

He’d never said I couldn’t buyhimanything.

“There’s not a single thing I’d change about you, Ben Blackwood,” I murmured, drowning in the heat of his gaze.

Andthatwas the truth.

The man was almost perfect, and he needed a few imperfections to make him human.

“Maybe it does kill me just a little that you don’tneed meanymore,” he said in an ungodly sexy voice. “But I want to beyour choiceif and when you decide that you want to be stuck with me. Not because you need me financially, but because you know I’m the only guy on the planet that you want. You can let me know when you’ve finally made that decision. But I think I should warn you that I plan to do everything in my power to try to be the guy that you choose, Ariel.”

Before I could respond, he lowered his head and kissed me.

The embrace took my breath away.

---