Page 40 of Forget Me Not

“Shit, Lo. Are you okay?” I hear Theo’s voice, and at the same time, I hear a separate voice say, “Call a code white.”

I open my eyes to see him squatting down next to me.

“Yeah, I’m fine.” I reach up, wincing when my fingers touch my cheek. I pull them away and see blood covering them. I look up to see the team Cara brought handling the situation.

“Come on, Lo. I got you.” Theo wraps my arm around his shoulder to help me stand. I then notice Cara walking back into the room with a wheelchair that Theo ushers me into.

“This is ridiculous. I’m fine.” I go to stand, but Theo immediately stops me, looking concerned.

“Well, I’m going to make sure of that,” he says. “Now, keep your ass in that wheelchair and let me check you out.”

I roll my eyes, sitting down and letting him wheel me over into an empty patient room. I zone out as he asks me a million questions, all while lecturing me for getting myself into bad situations. I placate him, letting him check the wound on my cheek that I already know is superficial, my shoulder that is no more than a bad bruise, and my head to rule out the concussion that I do not have.

After he finally agrees with me that it’s all just bumps and bruises, giving me some high-dose ibuprofen for the pain, he agrees to come with me to talk to my attending. Something I tell him is unnecessary, but he insists. We find my attending, and I explain the situation, which he’s already been informed of and file an official incident report. Luckily, Dr. Andrews is one of the nicest attendings on staff, so he tells me to go home and take the rest of the week off. Something that is more than generous since it’s only Monday.

He asks if I’m okay to drive home, to which I answer yes, and at the same time, Theo answers no. I roll my eyes, assuring Dr. Andrews I’m fine, but he agrees to let Theo drive me home anyway. It’s not worth the argument, so I nod my head, thank him, and follow Theo out the doors to the car. Theo is quiet during the drive, probably suspecting I’ve been through enough for one day.

“Go inside, take the pain meds, and get some rest,” Theo says as he pulls up to my building, puts the car in park and turns to look at me. “Call me later.”

“I will. Thank you for everything, I mean it.”

“Always, Lo. Now, go ice that pretty face of yours before it gets covered in hideous bruises.” I laugh at him, getting out of the car and making my way upstairs.

I open the door to my apartment and step inside, ready to crash, when a male figure on the couch catches my attention and scares the shit out of me.

“Kade, what are you doing here? You nearly gave me a heart attack.” I catch my breath, putting a hand over my chest to calm my pounding heart.

“Theo texted Demi that there was some sort of incident at work, Demi texted me, and I rushed over here. When I realized you weren’t here yet, I tried to go to the hospital, but Demi calmed me down and told me to wait here for you.” Kade rushes off the couch toward me, cupping my hurt face gently into his hands. “Who the fuck did this to you, Logan? Who the fuck thought—”

“Hey, relax, it’s okay. I’m okay,” I cut him off, resting my hand over his, reassuring him. “I promise. And it wasn’t his fault. He had paranoid hallucinations, felt crowded and scared. He didn’t mean to hurt me. He probably didn’t even realize that he did.” I see a mask fall over his face as I speak. His eyes go blank of any emotion, and suddenly I feel completely disconnected from him. I recognize his defenses going up, considering I do it so often myself.

“Kade? Where’d you go?” I reach for him with my other hand, but he takes a step back, dropping his hand from my face and releasing me altogether. “What just happened?” I pry, even knowing I would hate it if he was doing it to me. His eyes meet mine in a blank stare.

“I’m sorry. I have to go.” He brushes past me, nearly running out the door and slamming it behind me, causing me to wince at the loud sound. I don’t know what I said to trigger the defense mechanism, but I recognize it, nonetheless. He’s running.Avoiding. Hiding. It’s everything I constantly do, but it feels different having it done to me. I look toward the door, a part of me thinking,wishingfor him to come back in here and explain himself, but I know that he won’t.

I turn away from the door, sigh, and make my way toward my bedroom. I follow Theo’s instructions, showering the day off of me before taking the meds and crawling into bed. I close my eyes, urging sleep to come, but the urge to open my night table drawer is stronger. Misery loves company after all. I ignore my common sense once again and grab the journal, opening it to where I left off.

TWENTY-ONE

BARGAINING

CHAPTER

TWENTY-TWO

Kaden

I’ve been sitting on the sidewalk outside Lo’s apartment for the past three and a half hours. I haven’t moved since I left her standing inside the apartment, wondering what the hell happened. Seeing her like that, hurt and with the look of defeat on her face, it killed me. When Demi texted me that she’d been hurt, I felt terrified. Then I got to her apartment and had to sit there, waiting for her, completely helpless. But when she walked through the door, all I felt was anger.

I took one look at her and vowed to find the man who did this to her and make sure he was never able to lay a hand on anyone again. But then she explained what had happened. She said the one thing that put a halt in my plans and apparently my brain function. The man had schizophrenia. Every memory that I thought I’d buried from my childhood came rushing back and I just shut down right in front of her.

I’m supposed to be in there, comforting her, loving her. Instead, I’m sitting on the dirty concrete, the scar on my chest searing through my shirt as a reminder of exactly what the word schizophrenia means to me. I try to focus not on the scar itself but on what’s underneath it. My heart beating steadily beneathmy chest, and the reminder that right now, and I think since the first time I saw her, it is solely beating for her.

I stand up off the curb, brush the dirt off my black joggers and make my way back inside the apartment building. I take the stairs to her floor and stop when I get outside her door. I gently knock my hand against the door and wait. Minutes pass by and there’s no answer. I consider turning around and leaving, doubting she wants to see me anyway. I can’t just leave again though. Instead, I grab the door handle and push it down to find it unlocked. I open the door and step inside, looking for any sign of Lo. I already know Demi won’t be home until late, she made sure to tell me before she left for her shift, so I know she’s still alone.

I walk over to her bedroom, gently push open her door, and find her in bed asleep, a worn journal of some sort lying next to her. I turn around, planning to go back into the main room and sit on the couch while I wait for her to wake up, but I stop myself. In a moment of hesitation, I step farther into her room and close the door behind me. I quietly walk over to her bed and gently slide under the covers next to her. She’s lying on her side facing away from me, so I turn toward her, pressing my body gently against hers and pulling her into me.

The second I feel her body mold to mind, everything in me settles and I feel a calmness wash over me. She has that effect on me that nobody else ever has. As I press myself as close to her as I can, wanting to revel in how she makes me feel, I feel her body stiffen for a second as she becomes aware of the intrusion, but she relaxes just as quick. It’s like her body recognizes the feel of mine. I hear her breathing quicken, different from the steady pace it flowed just minutes ago, alerting me that she’s awake now. She doesn’t say anything though, and neither do I. We just lie there in silence, the closeness of our bodies providing comfort that words never could.

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