Page 27 of The First Deal

I flipped, opening my eyes and setting my jaw as I ground out my next words. “She’s an angel, the most incredible woman I have ever met in my life. Say another bad word against her, Violet, and you will regret it.”

Shit. What the hell did I just do?

Violet moved away from me, pressing her back up against the far wall of the hall. She looked as though I had just slapped her, except all colour had drained from her face. “You… you’ve fallen for someone?” Her voice was barely a whisper, words choked as they fell from her peach-glossed lips.

“No.” I reacted without thinking, a defensive wall instantly erecting itself around me. If I wasn’t ready to admit it to myself, then like fuck was I about to admit my feelings to Vi. She may have been my best friend, but she wasn’t going to see inside my heart, not today. “You don’t get to call her a whore though, Violet.”

“How many times have you fucked her?” my friend asked, swallowing hard.

“Not enough.” It was the truth, but I regretted saying it out loud.

I was all over the place, trying to keep my emotions locked inside, but they were spilling out, little bursts of feeling trickling into the hallway where I stood with a woman who wanted me in a way that I didn’t want her.

“Would you say the same if someone asked you that about me?”

Violet attempted to meet my eye, but she couldn’t do it. Instead, her eyes glazed over, and as I spoke, confessing the truth aboutusto her, they filled with tears, and her legs wobbled.

“No. You and me…” I sighed heavily, watching her break in front of me. “We’re not it. You’re one of the most important people in my life, Vi. But you’re not the woman I want to be with. And you deserve a man who loves you, not a man who could try. I shouldn’t have to try.”

“I can’t, I can’t stand here and listen to this,” Vi said quietly, her voice watery as she pushed herself away from the wall and stumbled her way to the elevator door.

She turned to face me as she waited for it to open. “I’m not bitter, Hudson. But you will end up regretting this. I am the best you’ll ever have; I love and accept you for everything that you are. Whoever she is, I can guarantee she won’t do the same.”

She was gone, the doors closing behind her before I could tell her that she was wrong. But her words clung to me, and as I turned to go back inside and find Hannah, needing to feel her soft skin against mine, I wondered if I was, in fact, wrong.

Could Hannah accept me, and did I want her to?

The idea of a future together didn’t feel scary. But the idea of showing her my life still was. I knew I didn’t have much time left before I’d need to either grow a pair and show her, or let her leave me. Yet, I couldn’t bring myself to do anything except drag her into my arms, press my lips to her forehead, and inhale her until my lungs were marked with her scent.

Oh, I was in deep. Fuck.

“Did you go out? I thought I heard the door,” Hannah asked as she craned her neck to look up at me.

“Only into the hall,” I said, wondering if I should admit to her what had happened.

Vi had attempted to seduce me, but she was still my friend, and one day I’d like her to meet Hannah, if she stayed in my life for long enough. Did I want Hannah’s view of her tarnished by a desperate, silly act? Or would I be better off keeping it to myself?

When I looked down at the girl in my arms though, I knew that I needed to tell her the truth, the whole truth about my best friend, even as far as what had happened on the roof the day before Violet’s birthday.

Hannah rested her chin on my chest. “Why?”

Pulling on my big boy pants, I cupped her face and dropped my head, kissing her nose first, then her cheeks, then her lips. When I was done, I stroked my thumbs over her cheeks and spoke. “Because my friend—”

I was cut off by a loud bang coming from the lounge.

“What was that?” Hannah asked, startled and wide-eyed.

I took a step away from her, my fingers caressing her cheek for one final second before I led the way through the bedroom door and into the lounge.

I was instantly on edge. Was it Violet? Had she decided not to leave after all? She could have easily let herself in again. I was about to confess everything to Hannah, but if Violet beat me to it, I knew I’d have no hope of keeping this beautiful creature.

Turning back to face Hannah, I started babbling. “The thing is, Hannah, I… well… years ago when I didn’t know what would happen, I—”

A voice that was definitely not Violet’s cut me off again and I spun wildly in a circle to find the last person I wanted Hannah to meet standing behind me. “Oh, you’ve double booked. Nice.”

“You’re early,” I whispered, then quickly turned back to Hannah, my stomach twisting in a tight knot as she stared past me at the blonde twenty-one-year-old girl who had let herself into my home.

“Who is that?” Hannah mouthed, her gaze tracking the girl as she stomped away.

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