Page 36 of Dr. Harley

I’m slightly ashamed to admit that I try to find her on social media. She doesn’t have accounts, but her sisters do. She makes occasional appearances in family photos, but never when they’re out at night. I know the day is coming that there will be a picture of her with a man. There’s a part of me that fears that day, and a part of me that thinks it may be what I need to move on.

All of a sudden, I feel my arm being pulled. I look and see Mikael dragging me back to our table.

“Brody, get it together.” I pinch my eyebrows together in question. “You had a beautiful woman all over you on the dance floor and you were frozen still.”

“What do you mean? I was dancing.”

He shakes his head. “Youweredancing. You’ve been frozen in place for the past five minutes. You didn’t move a muscle.”

“Oh. I didn’t realize it.”

“You’re thinking of her?” I blow out a breath and give him a resigned smile. “You haven’t caved and called her, have you?”

“No. I’m determined on that front. If I ever talk to her again, it’ll be in person.”

He holds out his hand. “I assume you’re still stalking her on social media. Let me see her picture again.”

“I’m not stalking her. I just need to see her face sometimes.”

“So, you’re not checking to see if she’s with other men?”

I give him the finger as I pull up one of Reagan’s social media accounts and find a picture. I hand him my phone. He studies the photo. “Well, I certainly understand the appeal. She’s definitely gorgeous.”

“It’s not just that. It’s everything about her. I don’t see how I will ever find anyone that remotely matches up. She’s the full package.”

While my phone is in his hands, I hear my text tone. He mutters, “åh skit.” [Translation: Oh shit]

“What?” I grab my phone. The air is knocked out of my lungs. It’s Harley.

Harley: Hey Brody. Today was the first day of my final year. Once again, I was thinking of that day seeing you walk through the door. In all honesty, it’s not the only time I’ve thought of you. I hope it’s going well there. I read up on what you’re doing. It sounds amazing. I hope you’re enjoying yourself.

I reread it five times. My text tone goes off again.

Harley: Sorry for the text. Mom is moving out of my childhood home this week. Feeling a little emotional. Playing a few “what ifs” in my head.

My head is spinning. I can’t believe she’s still thinking about me. I haven’t heard from her in a year. I assumed she’d have long since forgotten about me. Knowing she hasn’t meanseverything. These feelings aren’t going away, for either of us. I didn’t imagine this connection.

Dad was right. I have some more time here, but I think I know what I need to do when I get home. For the first time in a while, I feel hope.

* * *

HARLEY

I walk into my childhood home for the last time. There are so many memories here. Mom needs this though. She needs closure on this part of her life to truly move on. Every part of this house reminds her of him.

We’ve been telling her for the past year that she needs to move. As much as it hurts to let go, I’m proud of her for finally doing it.

I see her sitting on the ground with Skylar and Reagan. They’re all crying. I look at them. “Come on you guys. No crying. We’ve had enough tears over the past two years to last a lifetime. Let’s fill this house with laughter one last time. That’s what this house really means to me. Let’s remember the happy memories. They drastically outweighed the sad ones.” I hold up two bottles of wine and a package of plastic cups.

Mom wipes her tears and smiles. “You’re absolutely right Harley. Come sit with us. There’s pizza on the counter if you’re hungry.”

I grab a slice, open the bottles, and sit on the ground. I fill a cup for everyone. We toast to forgetting sadness and remembering happiness.

For some reason, Brody’s face crosses my mind. I’ve been so unhappy since he left. I don’t remember the last time I was truly happy. I texted him again today. I don’t know why. I just needed to somehow feel closer to him.

I can’t look at other men. I really needed to hear from him, but he didn’t reply. Maybe he changed his number in Sweden. Or maybe he’s over me and doesn’t want to talk to me. Whatever it is, it hurts.

I went on a date this past weekend. It was a guy that has asked me out at least ten times. He’s a year older, so he’s done with medical school now. I figured if it didn’t work out, at least I wouldn’t have to see him.

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