Page 89 of Poetry of Flowers

“Nash, I tell you there are weird coincidences that conclude her, or Dad, had something-.”

“Kayden, stop!” my brother looked furious.

“You’re almost eight, you got to stop living in your brutal imagination, no one here is a killer. I know what happened is scary and that Tillie is hurt, but what happened was an accident.” He grabbed me by the shoulders and made me look at him.

“I understand why you hate Dad and I accept that for you, same goes for Mom but-.”

“I don’t hate Mom!” I disagreed.

“Then you must know that saying she killed her best friend is hurtful and wrong. You don’t do that, Kayden. Imagine someday someone told you it’s your fault because something happened to Tillie-.”

“Stop!” I yelled at my brother because I couldn’t bear the thought.

Nash let go of me.

“I’ll stop, but you need to understand that saying what you did was wrong.”

I didn’t think about hurting Mom’s feelings, it all just seemed so suspicious.

Mom came out the door with my sister, who was wearing a puffy black dress.

“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to scare you,” my brother apologized quietly when Mom came towards us. She is smiling, which was probably Faith’s doing. She always made us all happier with her giggles and her hugs.

“Are you two ready?”

We both nodded.

“Yes, and Kayden wants to apologize, he’s just sad because his heart hurts for Tillie. He could not imagine losing you at that age.” Nash apologized for me to calm the tension.

He always did that, like he was scared we would all fall apart because of one fight.

“Well, it’s okay, Kayden. I understand that you are hurting, we all are. Especially little Tillie and Remy, that’s why we have to be there for them today, okay? No more fighting.”

Mom told me, and I nodded quietly, not wanting to say anything else that could anger my mother again.

* * *

When we arrived,Jonas told my mom that Tillie was still in the car. She refused to come out, so he asked me to go and see what I could do.

Tillie had been clinging to me since it happened and everyone saw it, I didn’t mind, I liked having her close and there was no reason for me to leave her alone during this dark time. She would do the same for me, I was sure of it.

I opened the door to the back seat of the old Chevrolet and slid inside, next to a girl who was lying on her side. Curled into a fetal position, she didn’t make a sound.

“I don’t want to go to the funeral,” she mumbled quietly.

I lay my hand gently on her shoulder.

“You don’t have to, we can just stay here till it’s over, and if you like, we can watch it through the front window. We have a good view from here and there are not too many people,” I suggested, stroking my thumb over her black jacket.

“My dad said it’s a form of respect to attend a funeral, even Remy is there, and he doesn’t even understand what’s happening.”

A quiet sob escaped her, but she didn’t sit up.

“It will be okay, your father will understand, and technically, we are at the funeral. Do you want that? I’ll go and tell your dad and then come back.”

I asked her, and seeing her slow, hesitant nod was enough for me. I opened the door and left the car, walking up to Jonas, who was talking to Tillie’s aunt Cecily.

“She wants to watch the funeral from the car with me.” I told him.

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