Page 125 of Her Radiant Curse

“I am not Vanna,” I cry hoarsely. I start to push Oshli away, but his fingers graze my arm.

“Let me help you—”

“Don’t touch me!” I shout. Light flares from my chest, and Oshli is frozen, his mouth still wide.

“Vanna?” he whispers.

All it takes is that one word, that one name, and I wish the earth would devour me whole, the way it did Hokzuh.

“Never will you speak that name again,” I say, my voice trembling with power and trepidation.

His mouth clamps shut, and I twist from him to run through the trees. I run until I stumble upon a narrow stream, and there I kneel slowly, grabbing myself by the arms, forcing myself to breathe. I count to ten before I face my reflection.

What I saw in Oshli’s eyes was no illusion. No nightmare—or dream.

I have lips. Soft, lily-bud lips that are pink, even as I curl them in dismay.

I have eyes the color of teakwood, warm and umber. And my pupils—they’re round. They’re human.

Lastly, my skin…My scales are gone. I have cheeks and a nose, just as I’ve always wished. They are smooth and firm, and perfect—except for one thing.

This face—my face—is Vanna’s.

All the bile I’ve forced down threatens to surge up again. It can’t be.

But my face is as unmistakable as the light shimmering in my heart. A light that reflects my every thought and feeling, just as it did for Vanna. Whereas my sister’s light was gold, mine is silver. Still, it’s radiant—even more radiant than before—and casts a mesmerizing glow on my skin. I loathe it.

I press my palm to my chest, where Hokzuh’s pearl pulses. Every beat hurts. Was it this way for Vanna, or does it hurt because the pearl is broken inside me?

“Why did you do this to me?” I whisper to it. “Why did you give me my sister’s face?”

As soon as I ask, I know the answer. Bring my sister back, I begged the pearl. I cannot live without seeing her face again, without hearing her voice again.

And so, the pearl granted my wish. It granted both my wishes: to see my sister again and to finally be rid of my cursed snakeskin…but in the cruelest way imaginable.

Enough! I dig into my chest, trying to wrench out the pearl. My nails cannot even pierce the flesh. Fortified by the pearl’s magic, my skin is thick as armor.

I fall to my hands and beat the earth, letting out a frustrated, strangled cry.

What foolishness is this? Ukar’s head pops out of a leafy fern. Channi, enough.

The sound of my real name startles me, and I look up. “You…you know me?”

What kind of idiotic question is that? Ukar huffs, and his scales ripple red with mild irritation. Of course I know you, Channi. You could wear a donkey’s hide and I would still know you.

Without another word, I scoop him into my arms. I want to cry, but there are no tears left in me. My eyes are so dry they sting even when I blink.

Cry as much as you need to, Ukar says gently, but don’t despair. Your face might be Vanna’s, but the rest of you is still Channi. Your strength, your heart…your blood too, from the smell of it.

It’s meant to cheer me, but I cannot be cheered. “Your king lied,” I tell Ukar. “He said that ‘one sister must fall for the other to rise.’ I was meant to fall. Not Vanna. Me.”

What makes you think you haven’t? Ukar prods. He tilts his head skyward. Vanna has risen, and you…you still carry the burden of life. There are many ways yet to fall, and you will have years ahead of you.

“I don’t want years with this face.”

After bearing Angma’s curse for so long, you will let this one defeat you? Vanna wouldn’t want that.

“She doesn’t get a say in what she wants anymore,” I snap. As soon as the words leave me, I wish I could take them back. My mouth tastes bitter, and I stare at my hands. “It’s not only a face I have to bear, Ukar,” I say thickly. “It’s the pearl, too.”

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