Page 105 of Soul of a Witch

Yet,hewanted to pleaseme.

“I frightened you the other day,” he said. “When the intruders came and I attacked them, I did it to defend you. But I still acted without thought as to what you would want, and for that, I’m sincerely sorry.”

Shock cascaded over me, swiftly followed by a strange and unexpected panic. “You don’t need to apologize. You did what you thought you had to, it’s okay, it’s —”

His finger pressed against my lips, silencing me.

“I offer you power, and yet when it comes time to relinquish mine, I struggle to do it because I fear what could happen to you. I worry about you, Everly, constantly. Not a minute goes by that I don’t think of you. And I would sacrifice my own life to protect you, but I can’t make myself into the creature you need.”

It ached to see him look so uncertain. I laid my hand on top of his, pressing my face against his palm. Skin-to-skin contact with him felt electric, a current flowing between us.

“Callum, you areexactlywhat I need. When I found you, you were what I neededmost…” My breath caught with unexpected emotion, and I fell silent, ashamed of myself.

“I didn’t mean to make you sad.” His thumb stroked over my cheek. “I can protect you from harm, but I can’t protect you from what you feel. But I can give you shelter to experience the emotions you need to. If you need to speak, I want to listen. I want to understand.”

He knelt and pulled me with him. I sat cross-legged, facing him, trying to gather my words. I was accustomed to keeping my feelings locked up, hidden away. If something bothered me, I would simply bear it and move on because there was no other choice. To admit how I felt was too intimate, too…honest.

But Callum looked just as uncomfortable as I felt. He knelt before me like he was awaiting something painful. His posture was stiff.

The last time he’d tried to apologize to me, he’d begged me to hurt him. Maybe pain was the only way he knew how to deal with his guilt. But he’d chosen another way this time, and he looked lost.

“When I met you, I was so afraid,” I said. “Even now, I still feel so much fear, andyes— sometimes I’m afraid of you, Callum. You’re larger than life. You’re older and stronger than most beings I’ve ever encountered, and I’ve been surrounded by monsters every day of my life. But you gave me an opportunity to be brave and a reason to try. If I wanted to escape the monsters, I needed to be saved by one.”

Edging closer to him on the blanket, I said, “I need you, Callum, exactly as you are. I don’t need you to change. I need you to grow with me.”

I’d never been given a clear vision of what romance was supposed to look like, or partnership, or love. It terrified me to even think of those things, to dare put some kind of relationship label upon whatever this was.

Butthis, regardless of what I called it, was special. It was intimate, it was raw. It wasn’t something I wanted to change; it was something I wanted to explore, to nurture to see how it would grow.

Callum hesitated for a moment before he brushed his hand against my face. “The violence you’ve witnessed in your life is no fault of your own. Not your father’s violence, or your mother’s, or siblings’…or mine. But if I can, when this is over, I’ll give you a life without violence. That’s my promise to you.”

Shaking my head with a soft smile, I said, “You’ve already promised me so much.”

“But not enough,” he said. “It will not be enough until you are at peace. I found my hope in you and I have no intention of letting that go. So if I anger you, if I frighten you, or make you sad — tell me. Yell at me if you wish, take out your anger if need be. But don’t run from me.” He leaned forward and rested his forehead against my shoulder before he turned his face, pressing into my neck. “Face me. Teach me. Let me learn how to take care of you.”

I was thankful his face was lowered, so he wouldn’t see the tears brimming in my eyes.

No one had everwantedto take care of me. I had always been a burden to those around me, an unpleasant but unavoidable responsibility. When I wasn’t being ripped between my parents, I was trying to make myself a shadow in Meredith’s house to avoid her wrath.

This monstrous being claimed he wanted to keep me…protect me…carefor me. The thought of allowing anyone else to take charge of my well-being was terrifying — no wonder Callum was tying himself into knots trying to please me. He saw the constant fear in my eyes, he saw me creeping through life like a hunted rabbit.

My reactions were my own responsibility to manage. As much as he wanted to, he couldn’t steal the fear from my eyes or crush the distrust in my heart. I had to do that myself. I had to learn how to care for him too.

“It seems like you’ve already learned a lot,” I said, smiling at him as he raised his head. The tears still lingered in my eyes as I was unable to choke them down, but he swiped his thumb over my cheeks and wiped them away. “Where did the picnic idea come from?”

“I read one of your books,” he said and dragged the picnic basket closer. “Many years ago, I was told human women are fascinated by cheese, so of course…” He pushed open the basket, allowing me a glimpse at the goodies within. “I brought a variety.”

My mouth dropped open at the sheer volume of food he’d brought. It looked like enough to feed an army. A large bottle of wine stuck out of the backside of the basket, and Callum drew it out, using one sharp claw to easily pop the cork.

“Where are the glasses?” I said, peering around in the basket.

“The wine is already in a glass. Why would we need more?”

Why, indeed.

He passed the bottle to me, and I giggled as I lifted the whole thing into the air for a sip. He took out the food, each plate carefully wrapped in a handkerchief. There was a whole roast chicken, a variety of dry sausages and cheese, and a loaf of fresh bread that was still warm as he unwrapped it. There were platters of sliced fruit and cream, roasted vegetables, cold salads. Then came the desserts, which Callum didn’t bother to save for the end, but spread before me to pick and choose whatever I wanted.

I swiftly realized this monstrous pile of food wasn’t even meant for the both of us; Callum didn’t touch any of it except for the sausage, which he nibbled at as if it was an expensive whiskey to be slowly sipped.

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