Page 26 of Adrift

Dean: We might need harder stuff than beer, then. I’m on it.

Yeah, Valium or a concussion, perhaps. I don’t type that out, of course.

Dean: Hey so, is your sister-nanny going to be there? Karine has been raving about her non-stop. I’m asking because I wanted to know how best to present myself. Should I come in my Sunday best or my Fuckable Friday Special?

Garrett: Oh yeah. I forgot about your sister-nanny. Is she cute? I faintly recall meeting her last year, but it’s all a blur.

Garrett: And hell no! Not your fucking Friday special. No one needs to see that shit again.

I grit my teeth, reading their texts as they come through while I prepare Arman’s lunch. Unlike me, my brothers are flirtatious and charismatic. I’ve gone out with them enough to be privy to the charm they fling on women, making them putty in their fucking hands.

The thought of them getting said hands on Rani or even flirting with her has me on edge. She’s too innocent, too fucking sweet for anyone like them.

And as for Dean’s Fuckable Friday bullshit–some sorority girl once told my dumbass brother that he’d look great if he wore one of those newsboy hats with his shirt unbuttoned to reveal his chest. Apparently, my brother is not above taking fashion advice from random women at a bar, because the next Friday, Dean went out with the aforementioned outfit and claimed he had a threesome with two women. Since then, he’s referred to it as his Fuckable Friday Special.

A tense pressure forms in my jaw as I pound out the message, retyping it a couple of times before sending it.

When it comes to my brothers, I can’t come across overly dickish or obvious because if there’s one thing they’re good at, it’s questioning me until I wish for death via decapitation. Like fucking termites to wood, they’ll wear me down until I become nothing but dust.

But, I also want to make it clear that my nineteen-year-old sister-in-law is off limits for their thirty-five-year-old asses.

She’s off limits for thirty-two-year-old jaded assholes as well, but that’s not the point.

Me: This is not a clothes-optional party, asshole. Show up with your shit covered or I’m going to kick you the fuck out. Also wtf is up with you two calling her my sister-nanny? She’s not my sister. Anyway, she’s not here now, but I’m expecting her at some point during the evening.

Garrett: @Dean, is it me or does our little brother seem a bit . . . defensive?

I groan, rolling my eyes before throwing my phone onto the sofa and focusing on my son, who is again trying to walk. I’ll have the rest of the day to deal with my annoying-as-fuck older brothers. I’m just sitting down to play with Arman when I see Dean’s response come in.

Dean: Definitely not just you. I read the ‘she’s not my sister’ part loud and clear. Looks like we’re going to need the hard shit tonight.

Chapter Ten

Rani

“So, you’re definitely going to stay there all summer, then?” My mom’s face tightens as she leans back against the couch in her living room.

Her FaceTime call had come in as I was parking at the bakery this morning, so I’m currently sitting inside my car, looking from her to the sinister clouds darkening the sky. Given the choice, I’d much rather look at the clouds.

I sigh, exasperatedly, repeating my response for possibly the fifth time in the past ten minutes we’ve been chatting. “Yes, Mom. How many times will you ask me before you realize I’m not changing my mind? Yes, I’m here through the summer to take care of Arman.” I might get fired after what happened on Friday night, but I’m not going to tell her that. “He’s doing fine, by the way, in case you were wondering about your only grandson. He’s trying to walk and talk, and he is making progress every day.”

My mother snorts. “Sonia was running by the time she was ten months old. And she was already so articulate, I never had to wonder what she needed.”

I stare at my mother for a beat, my anger stirring inside my veins and my temples throbbing with the onset of a headache. “He’s one, Mom. Many kids don’t talk or walk at one. Karine said the pediatrician told them it was completely normal and that he’ll do all those things at his own pace.”

“Karine will believe only what she wants to hear. She never questions the validity or consequences of anything when it concerns her children–and now her grandchildren. Arman is slow; that’s all I’m saying. It’s not an insult, Rani, it’s a fact. Coddling him will do nothing but make him believe someone will always be there to pick him up. You, Karine, and that useless father of his are only giving him a false sense of security.”

My chest tightens, wanting to beat my damn steering wheel with my fist. “Yeah? Well, what does not giving your children that sense of security do to them, Mom? You should know; you’ve perfected the art. There’s tough love, and then there’s your brand of insensitivity. What has it ever gotten you? What has it ever gotten any of us, besides heartache and loneliness?”

“Rani–” My mother’s voice is a warning, her face set like stone.

“You might have had the world’s most brilliant child with Sonia, but in the end, what did that get you besides another gold star you placed beside your name. Because everyone knows that if you were such an incredible mother, no daughter of yours would have been able to resist not speaking to you, not having you in her life, for ten years.”

Tears cloud my eyes and I know I’ll regret the words as soon they’re spoken, but it’s as if I’m possessed. As if something was unleashed inside me the second her vile words against Arman and Darian came out of her mouth. “So, be as haughty as you want, Mom. Give yourself all the gold stars for setting the standard on parenting. But we both know it won’t bring back the ten years you lost with her, and it certainly won’t raise her from the dead.”

“Rani!” my mom gasps. Her chest rises and falls as tears drip from her eyes.

I know I went too far. I let my anger get the best of me; I let her get the best of me. I allowed her to affect my peace, and that’s something I’ve worked hard to never let anyone take from me again.

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