Page 108 of Adrift

Well, isn’t she the chatterbox!

Maybe seeing me again will trigger another bout of verbal diarrhea. Still don’t give a shit, though.

I hand Arman what I need him to hold, hoping he doesn’t try to put it in his mouth before taking out the extra large bundle from the back of the car.

Holding his hand in mine, we make our way up the driveway. I ring the doorbell and move over to the side so Rani doesn’t see me when she opens the door. My son regards the lily in his hand curiously, then bounces on his feet as if the flower has just somehow played him his favorite song. Kids are fascinating little things.

The lock slides and Rani opens the door, finding my son standing near her feet. “Arman!”

Her startled voice, along with her gasp, have my lips twitching. I step up behind my son and Rani eyes me with a mixture of shock and elation before she schools her features. “What are you doing here?”

I bend down to Arman, whispering in his ear, “Can you give it to her, buddy?”

Rani studies the flower in Arman’s hand before she gulps a soft but quick breath. Her eyes soften. “What–”

Arman looks at the flower once more before lifting his arm and the flower toward his aunt with a semi-toothless grin. She bends down to take it from his hand, pursing her lips to stop them from quivering.

It should be known that I feel absolutely zero guilt in using my adorable son to help us get our girl back.

Getting back up, I search her eyes, gesturing to the flower with a tilt of my chin. “Read it.”

Rani swallows before finding the note attached to it. I’d scribbled it as fast as I could, but it’s clear enough that she can read it. At least, I hope that’s what the tears rolling down her cheek indicate.

My dad is an idiot. Please come back home, Masee.

Rani pulls her bottom lip into her mouth before her body slumps. She bends down to give Arman a hug and a kiss before wiping her cheek. She still hasn’t said a word. I have no idea what’s going through her mind, so I know I have to move to phase two.

With my pulse feeling erratic and out of control, I hold the bouquet up in one hand while I hold Arman’s hand in the other. Her stance is back to being stiff, and she turns her head to look anywhere but at me, but not before I see the pain swimming in her eyes. I yearn to reach out and cradle her face like I’ve done so many times before. I yearn to kiss her and bring her back to me, but I know she won’t let me get off the hook that easily.

“Remember when I told you that you were like a vacation I never wanted to come back from, and you told me you didn’t want to be that? That you wanted to be the home I always came back to?” She glances at me briefly before going back to looking at something past me. “So, here I am, Rani, standing in front of you and asking you to let me in.

“My house in Tahoe . . .” I shake my head, “it’s just a structure. I thought it was my home; I thought it was all Arman and I needed, but it’s not. It’s empty without you because you make it a home. You give us a home, and I can’t fucking live,” I suck in a sharp breath. “I can’t fucking breathe without you in it.”

She studies me. “You hurt me, Darian. You hurt me when you said you didn’t know who I was, that you didn’t know if you could trust me.”

I put the bouquet of flowers on the ground before lifting my son up in my arms. With my other hand, I reach around Rani’s neck, pulling her face toward us. “I fucked up, sweetheart. I was so wrapped up in everything that had happened yesterday that I didn’t think about every fucking sacrifice you’ve made for me and Arman. I was just focused on that one specific moment, not seeing the reasons why you did what you did.”

Her eyes water and a tear runs down her cheek, dripping from her jaw. I brush it away with my thumb and she sniffles. “I would never intentionally do anything to hurt you or Arman.”

“I know.”

“I kept that text from you because I thought I was protecting you. And while my gut disagreed, somewhere inside I hoped I was wrong about Sonia–that perhaps my uncertainty was unfounded and that I was misinterpreting her text.”

“I know, baby.” I rub her cheek. “After I had a chance to think about it, I realized that I might have done the exact same thing in your position.”

She drops her gaze, grimacing.

“I tried so fucking hard to resist you, Rani. I told myself you were too young, that I was too damaged. I told myself it was too soon to feel anything for anyone–let alone my sister-in-law. I told myself that this was all temporary, that you’d leave at the end of the summer so it was better to not let my heart get involved. I told myself all of that.”

Her brows pinch and she continues to look at my feet. “I’m waiting for the part where you tell me you were an utter and complete oaf, Darian. When will you get to that part?”

This girl . . ..

My lips twitch but I dare not smile. This would definitely be the wrong time to smile. “I couldn’t resist you. You were a fucking magnet to my soul, sweetheart. No matter how much I tried to wrestle my feelings, every fiber of my being needed you.” I lean in, placing a kiss on her lips while Arman grabs a strand of her hair, giggling. “I trust you with my fucking life. I trust you more than I trust myself. I was lost before you came into my life, but you found me. You gave me a home.”

Rani gasps against my lips when she notices my unshed tears. “Darian.”

I swallow, forcing myself to not blink, to keep the tears from slipping. “Come back to me, baby. I know I fucked up. I shouldn’t have said what I said, and I should have chased after you as soon as you left. But, please, come back to me. Don’t leave my son because his dad is a dumbass.”

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