Page 97 of Ablaze

“Protecting me? From what?”

He shrugs, letting his shoulders fall. “From me.” At my questioning gaze, he continues, “My job, my life . . . they’re unpredictable. It would take one wrong move, one wrong decision, and I could lose it all.” He brings my hand up to his lips, brushing them over it. “I didn’t want someone I loved, someone who loved me back, to go through heartbreak like that, so I kept you at a distance.”

I run the pad of my thumb across his jaw, loving the feel of his stubble under it. “So what changed?”

His eyes connect with mine, but I can tell he’s somewhere else. “Someone once told me that life is short either way you slice it. It’s our last chance to live, our last chance to love.” He blinks as the haze clears and he pulls my face in his hands. “I didn’t want to waste my last chance without you.”

My face blooms with a smile and my hands follow a trail around his neck, tangling inside the hair at his nape. “I’m glad you came to your senses . . . even if you took the long way getting there.”

Dean smiles, his plush lips impossibly beautiful against the hard lines of his jaw.

I clear my throat. “It was that day when Jessie came to the café to tell me she’d heard you speaking to someone on the phone at the grocery store about your feelings for a woman . . .” I gnaw at my bottom lip, feeling slightly nervous all of a sudden. “It was that day I knew I couldn’t watch you start dating someone else again.”

Dean lets out a breath, the warmth of it hitting my lips. “That woman was you, sprinkles. I was talking to Grams about you. She was the only one who knew before Rohan.”

Dean leans his head back on the headboard as exhaustion settles in his eyes. It’s been an emotionally draining few days, and I know this conversation isn’t helping. Still, it needs to happen. There are too many years of missing communication and opportunities that need to be brought to light.

“Is that what made you decide to take that job?” His pained eyes rove over my face, his fingers trailing under my tank top. Despite the somber mood between us, the feel of them on my skin has my nipples pebbling and goosebumps sprinkling over my skin.

“It sounds stupid now that I think about it–that I made a decision based on what Jessie said–but at the time, I truly believed you couldn’t have been talking about me.”

“I’m an idiot for not telling you sooner.”

We stare at each other for a moment, our admissions both monumental and sad. Monumental for the fact that they’re finally out in the open, but sad for the time it took for us to get here.

His voice is raspy when he speaks again. “I drove to LA to see you.”

My fingers freeze in his hair. “When?”

He licks his lips, and it has me wanting to reach down and kiss them. I realize I can now. I can kiss him any time I want. I can kiss him without restraint.

“A month after you left.” He looks to the side, avoiding my eyes as if his confession is something to be embarrassed of. “I wanted . . . I needed to see you, so I drove to your apartment.”

“Wha–” A shocked whisper leaves my mouth. “You drove all the way back to see me?”

His gaze flicks back to me. “But then I saw you get into a car with some guy . . . and you looked happy, so I decided not to intrude.”

“No, Dean.” I shake my head. “The only guy whose car you could have seen me getting into is my boss’s, and that’s all he is to me. Nothing more, nothing less.” I pause. “Why didn’t you call or text me to tell me you were there?”

“I wanted to, but–” His throat bobs as he swallows. “But I didn’t know where we stood. I didn’t know if you’d moved on. And if you had, I didn’t want to put you in a weird position to choose between me or your new job or this other person–”

“Dean.” I hold his face, inching my body closer to him.

No matter how close we are, my body wants more. More of his exquisite sandalwood smell. More of the feel of his warm skin and sculpted form near mine. More of him.

“No job, no person, no dream compares to you. You’re it. You’re my person.” I blink rapidly, feeling the press of tears behind my eyes. “The irritating and charming man who’s made me laugh since the moment we met. The man I’ve been in love with longer than I can remember. It wouldn’t have been a choice for me when I’d already chosen you.”

Dean lets out a deflated breath. “I fucked up, sprinkles. I let so much time pass–”

I lean in to kiss his lips, stopping him from saying more. “We both did. But let’s not do that again.”

Our kiss deepens when Dean pulls me over his erection–the sweetest slide of his hard length at my center. I can feel myself getting wetter, my stomach clenching with need. My nipples feel almost painful against the fabric of my shirt and my clit throbs as he drags me back and forth over him.

“Dean.” I moan into his mouth, grasping his soft hair. “I want you.”

His hand travels up my stomach and over my breast, thumbing my nipple before he pulls my tank top off. Licking over my scar, as if to make sure he gives it all his attention, he finally pulls one of my nipples into his mouth. He kneads my ass, dragging me over his length again and again while he sucks and bites on my nipple.

My skin heats, a flush creeping up my body as I feel my juices drench my panties.

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