Page 3 of The Forever After Bet

“You’ve got this,” Leah whispers.

I take a couple of deep breaths, slowly slide the rings off my finger, and I undo the necklace at my throat. I slide the rings and the heart and number ten charms to the new chain. June clasps it around my neck, and I tuck it under my shirt.

June wraps her arms around me on one side. Aubrey hugs me from the other, and Leah wraps her arms around all of us. I let out a groan and sob into Leah’s shoulder. I will make it through this. Ford made me a promise, and he’ll keep it. I’ll meet him in the meadow after graduation, and we’ll finally be together.

2. Violent Violet

Monday morning, I wake up early and head to the school to get in a run. It’s too dark to run outside in the mornings anymore. I need to expel my pent-up energy from the weekend. It’s still hard to think about. One second, I was happier than I’d ever been, and the next, I was living my worst nightmare.

The memory of Hannah running out of my house plays on an endless loop in my head. At night I dream about it. I call out and tell her I love her, and she comes back. Others, I run after her, and we get in my car and run away together. I’ve woken up the last two nights screaming Hannah’s name. I woke Jack both times. He and Tyler refuse to leave my side. They’ve been the only reason I’ve been able to hold my life together.

I asked Jack last night how Hannah was doing, and all he said was not good. I’ve picked up my phone a hundred times to call or text her, but I can’t seem to do it. I know what we said Friday night was all an act, but it felt real—it still feels real. Jack suggested we give each other some space to figure out our feelings. I agreed. It’s like I’m treading water, and there is no land in sight.

I love Hannah, and I want us to be together; but I don’t know how we do that after what happened on Friday. Where do we go from here? My parents were indifferent to my relationship with Hannah. My mom liked her before they found out about us eloping. I haven’t spoken to my parents since Friday night. They spent all weekend at home and made it clear I needed to stay home, too. That wasn’t a big deal. Jack, Ty, and I camped out in the basement theater room, watching movies and playing Xbox all weekend. Except for a midnight escapade to a city mailbox in the middle of a winter storm. That was super fun.

Gigi and Gramps came over to the house last night to talk to me. My mom screamed at Gigi for giving me her ring and supporting ‘my crazy idea.’ Mom told me to get the ring to give it back, but Gigi said it was mine to keep. My grandpa kept my mom busy so my grandma could talk to me alone. I broke down and told her everything that happened. She didn’t give me any advice, but she told me she loved me and hugged me while I cried. I can’t ever remember crying before this weekend. It makes me feel like something inside me is broken.

After a long run, I stay in the locker room at school until the five-minute bell rings for first hour. I don’t know how I’m going to spend the next hour being in the same room as Hannah, let alone sitting behind her. I’ve done hard things before, but this is different. I’m not expending energy playing sports or using my brain to think. It’s simply being around the girl I love and not being able to talk to her or hold her.

“Here goes nothing,” I mutter and walk into class.

Hannah is already in her seat. She is hunched over, writing in a notebook. She tenses when I sit at my desk but then slumps over and continues to write.

“Hey, Ford, how was your weekend?” Poppy Milton smiles at me, batting her lashes.

It felt like someone threw me into the pit of despair, and I had twenty years taken off my life. “It was cold,” I say, turning away from her and pulling my books out of my bag. I hear Poppy humph with annoyance, but thankfully she doesn’t say anything else.

After Principal Forest’s droll morning announcements, Mrs. Hammond tells us we can have the period to finish researching and writing the rough drafts of our senior thesis papers. They’re due Friday before we’re off for Thanksgiving. As soon as Mrs. Hammond’s done talking, Hannah picks up all her things and heads for the door. She walks across the front of the room, so she doesn’t have to pass by me. My gut twists with a mixture of sadness and anxiety.

Jack and I walk into history together. Hannah is there, but she’s not sitting in her usual seat. She’s taken an unused desk in the back corner of the classroom. I inwardly groan, sitting down in Hannah’s seat behind Jack.

Jack turns around in his seat, his forehead scrunched.

“She’s sitting in the back corner.” I shake my head. “She hates sitting in the corners.”

“Do you think she’d switch us places?” Jack asks.

“She wouldn’t even look at me this morning in English. She walked clear around the classroom to avoid me. I’ll try to get to class early tomorrow and sit over there.”

In economics, she does the same thing, sitting on the other side of the classroom. In chemistry, Hannah is talking to Landon when I come in. I try not to notice her, but it’s impossible. Hannah sits down next to me just as the bell rings. I can tell she’s tense. She’s so nervous that her hands are shaking. I clench my hands together to keep from reaching out and touching her. I want to lean over and tell her everything will be okay, but I don’t know if it will. Her pencil rolls away from her, and she smacks her hand against the table, stopping it.

When I look at her hand, it’s like she reached out and punched me. Hannah isn’t wearing her promise ring or the wedding band I gave her on Friday night. I feel like I can’t breathe. Mr. Kazansky hasn’t started class yet, so I bolt out of the room and down the hall to the bathroom.

“Pull it together, Cross,” I mutter to myself. I hold my hands out, looking down at them. How can I be mad? I took my ring off. I reach into my pocket, pull out the thin black silicone band, and put it on the finger on my right hand. I knew this day was going to be hard. Only I didn’t realize how hard.

When I get back to class, Violet Richland, who usually sits next to Landon, is in Hannah’s place. I grit my teeth and sit down. It’s hard, but I force myself not to look back at Hannah.

“Hey Ford, what’s up?” Violet smiles at me. She’s one of those girls who likes to wear short schoolgirl skirts. Her hair is always in pigtails or some type of weird bun. Today she’s got her hair up in space buns and is wearing a cat ears headband.

“Not much,” I mutter, pulling out my chemistry book.

“Congrats on your full ride to Sutherland,” Violet whispers while Mr. Kazansky talks about the functional groups of organic chemistry.

“Thanks,” I whisper and go back to writing the notes the teacher has up on the overhead. A couple of minutes later, she pushes a note across the table to me. I’m beginning to regret even being at school today.

I glance at the note. What are you doing after class? I close my eyes and take a deep breath. I scribble, eating lunch on the paper and push it away. Unfortunately, her notes don’t stop.

Duh, silly. I meant, what are you doing during lunch?

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