Page 66 of For Your Heart
They join us and Simon flashes us a smile. A smile that belongs to both of us. But then the damn girl gets his attention and turns him; bringing her mouth to his and fucking kisses him.
We knew this day would come. That our straight best friend would eventually become interested in girls and we’d not get to have him 100% like we have always had. We knew that. But when her mouth touches his and then she presses her fucking body to his and his hand lands on her hip, something inside me snaps.
I hurt everywhere. Declan announces the realization inside us before I make the connection.
“I love him.”
Fucking hell. What gay god allowed us to fall in love with our best friend? Why did we have to bethatcliché?
Worse, why do we have to watch this?
At the end of what I can stomach without freaking the fuck out, I grab Simon’s hand off her hip and yank him away. There’s a wet littlepopthat makes me cringe as I shove him into my brother’s chest and then basically become a barrier between the two of them.
Simon, my sweet innocent soul, just laughs off our jealousy. Tabitha does not find it funny at all. Her glare would be just as lethal as ours.
“You’re going to have to get used to him having a girlfriend. There are things you can’t give him that I can,” she says, and the smile she gives us is triumphant. She’s wrong, of course. There’s not a fucking thing she can give him we can’t.
You know, except a vagina. I’m reasonably certain I can make that irrelevant, though.
I don’t answer, and Tabitha rolls her eyes. “Call me later, Simon.” She turns, flipping her hair over her shoulder, and walks away, sashaying her hips.
“I do that better than she does,” Declan mutters.
Simon laughs again and steps away from Declan before turning for the car. But he kisses my cheek on the way and then Declan’s. I’m going to pretend that’s a thank you for rescuing him from the stupid girl.
Who needs girls?
But when he shuts the door and looks at me through the window, my heart stops entirely. Fucking hell, I’m in love with my best friend.
Meeting Declan’s eyes, I can feel his panic race through him as mine does. For a second, we link our hands together, letting the contact calm us both.
We’re screwed.
* * *
There’s a verystrange war going on inside me. My entire being has been connected to Simon since we met. I love him with everything inside me. There’s a part of me that I think would still throw everything away to be with him and Declan if he said that’s what he wants.
And yet, I don’t think I’d be completely happy anymore. I don’t think that’s whatI wantanymore. Though I’ll nevernotwant him. I’m pretty sure.
I look at Declan, and he raises a brow. Not because my thoughts surprise him. Fucker thinks and feels them too. He can’t lie to me. He rolls his eyes, a smile playing on his lips.
Simon is squished between us as we pet and shower him with kisses, almost absently. Because this is where he belongs. This is his home. This is our home. I only feel completely right when it’s the three of us.
But then, why the fuck does Sage keep flitting through my mind? Why do I have a strange ache inside me that wants him here, too? And this other face that I don’t actually know, but have memorized. Zarek. Declan’s man.
Is it weird that we even fall for two different men at the same time? Like we can’t even do that separately. He snorts in my head and I bury my face in Simon’s neck.
The issue isn’t how I feel about Sage. Not at all. I’m completely fine… Okay, I’m flailing and slightly panicky. It helps me remain somewhat rational when I talk to him because he’s an excitable and easily flustered puppy who needs to be redirected and reassured.
I have a feeling he hasn’t told me the true depths of his hurt. It runs deep. It’s given him so many insecurities that I don’t think he’s even fully aware of them. Not before they come up and are falling out of his mouth.
The only time I’ve ever felt such a strong need to protect and avenge someone has been regarding Simon. Not even Declan, since he’s never needed it. I would. Without a doubt. Hell, if someone ever hurt my brother, I don’t think I could be held responsible for my actions after. I’d lose my fucking mind.
There’d be blood on my hands.
“Love you too, psycho.”
I smirk but don’t look up to meet his eyes this time. This is what happens when we’re not allowed private thoughts. I never thought it would bother me. Hell, it still doesn’t bother me.
