Page 69 of For Your Heart
Simon pats his cheek. “You’re going to have to work on your dick control; but….” He looks at Stommer and I fucking hate the heart eyes he gives that man. “Yes. I think someone will. If it’s the right someone.”
While everything in me wants to tear Simon’s gaze away from Stommer and not let him look at that man that way, I’m not going to lie and say that the need that flares inside me is for that alone. I want that person to be Sage. I desperatelyneedit to be him.
“You’re okay if we love someone else?” Declan asks.
Simon turns his attention to us again. At leastthis lookis ours alone. “I know that no matter how much you love someone else, no matter how much they mean to you or how much time and room they take in your life, that you love me and that love will never change. Just like mine won’t change. And Damon’s won’t either.”
“It would be easier if you just loved us how we love you, you know,” Declan says.
He snorts. “I’m not built for you,” he says quietly. His arms tighten on us. “I’m… not into sex in the way you are. No matter how much you’re okay with my sexuality, I can’t give you what you need. That’s just not how I’m made.”
“You’re wrong that you think that would be an obstacle,” I say.
“Hmm,” Simon says, a wicked gleam in his eyes. “You’re right. Your sex drives match each other’s.”
I glare at him, my stare matching Declan’s. It makes Simon laugh. But his next words have me catching my breath. “I think that maybe you’re concentrating on the wrong parts of this. It’s not that our love is the wrong kind. It’s that we have too much love to keep between us. I love you with my entire being. I always will. Always. But I love Quin that much too. It’s different. Very different. But it’s just as strong. I bet that’s exactly what you feel for Sage and Zarek. Isn’t it?”
“Fuck.”
Fuck.
Twenty-Two
DAMON
It’s Saturday afternoon.Sage and I are in my car, heading forty minutes away to a destination I haven’t told him about. My head is a fucking mess as I can’t help but mentally listen in on Declan and Zarek having a conversation that I recently had with Sage.
Ours was… interesting. I was caught between stress and fond amusement as I watched the expressions play across Sage's face. While he didn’t talk about anything in his past at all, I gathered a few observations about what he’s been through. Primarily, he didn’t think he was going to find a man to love him the way he was.
I’m not sure if it was his parents or the crazy ex who made him feel like his best wasn’t ever good enough, likehewasn’t good enough, but one of them sure as fuck did. Or maybe both. If his mother set him up with that woman, there’s a chance that she was just like his mother.
The thing that bothers me most is that Sage is such a sweet, kind, and sensitive man. That means the guilt trips and manipulation they played on him were extra fucking cruel. To make him feel so inadequate in his own skin. So unsure of what he feels and everything he says.
The anger I have towards Stommer has now expanded to include the anger I have toward the people in Sage’s past. No one gets to hurt this man. Never again. I won’t fucking have it.
That being said, it was a rough fucking ride talking to him about Declan and Simon. I skipped the Declan conversation for now. That’s an entirely different kind of discussion. In some ways, I’d like to say that it might be easier because we’re brothers. It’s easy for a psyche to overlook any kind of intimate touch and interpret it to be harmless and platonic.
Declan snorts in my head and I know he’s paying attention to me alongside his conversation with Zarek. Because we’re always in each other’s heads, we’ve learned to split our attention pretty damn well. Sometimes we make each other background noise and yet nothing goes unnoticed. Not a damn thing. But more times than not, we’re just equally tuned into whatever we’re doing in person and what our brother is doing. As if we’re a person split in two.
As with everything else in our lives.
“I know we’re focusing on Simon, but I wonder if it would be better to introduce them to each other first. Meeting one new person is better than meeting three who we have personal connections with.”
I nod at Declan’s suggestion.Double date?I wonder.Yeah, that’s probably a good idea.
“Yeah. Let’s do that. Tomorrow? Or want to wait for next weekend?”
Tomorrow. Yep, no need to wait. Oh! I think you should dress your boy in a cock cage. I’m totally going to have Sage wear one during our date.
His laughter makes me grin.
“You’re smiling a lot,” Sage says quietly and I glance his way. He’s watching me with his wide golden eyes and a nervous smile.
I reach for his hand and lace our fingers together. “Listening to my brother is amusing sometimes.”
“You can hear him? Right now?” Sage asks, wide eyes filled with wonder.
Grinning, I nod. I’ve never tried to explain our connection to anyone except Simon, but for the first time since then, I kind of want to try. When Declan doesn’t have any objections, I say, “It’s a lot like hearing your own thoughts, but knowing they’re not yours. I know what he’s doing, saying, what he sees and hears. How he feels. Declan is an extension of me in every way.”
