Page 21 of Cougar

We continue to shoot the shit for a while, talking about whatever comes up. Bri takes a sip of her drink before she has what I would call an ah-ha moment.

“Oh! I forgot to tell you guys. I told Jonny that I wanted him to get a dick piercing.”

Oh, really?

“Did he freak out?” Audrina asks.

“Oh my god, his face went white. He could barely squeak out the word why. I died laughing. I wish I recorded it.”

“Willie said he’d get one, but then he found out we couldn’t have sex for a while, so I said never mind.”

“Yeah, that checks out. You slut.” Bri says, and Ashlynn shrugs her shoulders, taking a sip of her drink.

“You guys should get them to do it. It’s worth it.” I say.

Wanna know how to get four other women to shut up instantly? Insinuate that your man’s dick is pierced.

“Hold on. Are you saying that because you’ve been with a dude who has it, or are you saying our little Cougar has his dick pierced?” Ashlynn is practically out of her chair, waiting on bated breath for my answer.

I take a sip of my water, not wanting to tell them right away. I can see her going crazy, but honestly, this is fucking hilarious for me. It’s as if her whole night is now centered around this answer.

“If you don’t tell her, she will be up your ass,” Bri says, looking at Ashlynn, who is now vibrating with the need to know.

“I will be like the wart you can’t get rid of until you tell me,” Ash confirms. “So, spill it, bitch.”

“But teasing you is so much more fun.”

“The fuck it is.”

“Okay, it’s fun for me.”

When Ashlynn lets out a groan and throws her hands up in the air, I decide that she’s been tortured enough.

“Okay, okay. Jesus. Yes.”

I kid you not; Ashlynn’s eye twitches and it takes everything I have to not laugh. I’m about to tell her, but she blows up on me.

“Yes, what?! Oh, my god. Why are you all the worst at telling me what I want to know?”

Ellie, Bri, and Audrina all start coughing before I hear a chorus of them chanting meatloaf. I rub my head because I really don’t understand these women.

“This is amazing.” I laugh. “Cougar’s dick is pierced. There. Ya happy now?”

“Yes!” Ashlynn screams. She leans to her side and slides her phone out of her back pocket. “What kind is it? I wanna look it up.”

“Umm, he told me, but I don’t remember. It’s on the bottom of his tip.”

“Oooo, okay.”

She starts looking it up, and I shake my head, turning toward the others. They’re all smiling, and I can’t help but feel thankful I have something like this now. We continue talking for maybe a minute before Ashlynn throws her phone. Looking at her, she looks like she wants to barf.

“And that’s enough fucking internet for today,” her whole body shakes, and I’m not gonna lie, I’m terrified to ask what she saw. “I know that everyone is different, and what they want, to each their own, but…. I…. Why? Why would someone do that?”

“Should I ask you to tell me?” I ask her.

“No! Me seeing it is enough. It makes even my dick hurt. I’ll leave it at that.”

***

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