Page 61 of Cougar

His arms are crossed against his chest. He is radiating pissed-off energy, and I get it. No words are spoken as we wait for the elevator to take us down. After he punched me in the face earlier, one would think I wouldn’t want to be alone with him, but after seeing his reaction and hearing the small bit I did, I get it. He’s already lost one child. The thought of losing another and a grandbaby was too much for him. Sadly, I was the collateral damage in his outburst.

Leaving her just now was hard, but knowing her momma is with her makes it easier.

“I… Trust…. You,” Butcher mumbles. My eyes cut up to him, but I say nothing. He clears his throat and looks at me, “I trust you with her and with my grandson. I’m…sorry for acting before listening,” he tells me with a pained expression on his face.

“I don’t hold it against you, Butcher. You’re her dad. It’s your job to kill first and ask questions later. She is more important than the why.” I reach my hand out, offering it to him. Without breaking his eye contact, he takes it in a firm handshake. The elevator doors ding, and our hands drop. We head into the waiting room where the rest of our brothers are.

When we enter, I take in our surroundings. Our brothers are still broken up into small groups, but everyone is keeping an eye on Elvira and Cowboy—who are having words in the corner. It looks heated. I slowly make my way over there to let him know we’re here. Stupid, I know, but I need to do something.

“JJ. You can go deal with them and do what you need to do. I am not leaving this room until the doctor tells me something.” Elvira crosses her arms, staring down her mountain of a son.

“Mom, please. You need to get up and move. Go get something to eat or drink. Maybe take a walk. Something. It’s been hours.” Cowboy is pleading with her.

“Exactly! It’s been hours. This means it can be any minute the doctor walks in here and tells me what is going on with them. I refuse to leave this room. Run along and dole out justice.” Elvira sits in her chair, crossing her legs.

“Mom,” Cowboy crouches in front of her, “I’m doing this because I care. You need to look after yourself, too. You need to keep your strength up to be here for Dad and Theo.”

“If you’re so worried, you can go get me food and coffee. I am not leaving this room until I know what is going on with my men. I’ll let you know if something happens to them, or if I find out more information while you’re gone. And mark my words, son. I will find whoever did this, and I will put them in the ground myself.” She leans into Cowboy, lowering her voice so I can barely hear it. “And I will not be delivering the same quick death as Bonnie’s.”

After watching her do what she did with Bonnie, he knows she isn’t lying. None of us will put it past her to kill the son of a bitch that did this. We all want blood. We don’t even know if they’re going to make it, and we are already plotting the death of whoever is responsible. Regardless if they live or die, the culprit will not survive.

Cowboy sighs before he stands up. When he turns around, he immediately sees me as I’m standing behind him like some creepy stalker. He nods his head toward the other corner of the room. Once we start making our way over there, the other brothers follow. They know it’s time to talk. We all huddle together. No one speaks. Cowboy’s eyes are still on his mom. Her eyes are laser-focused on every member of the hospital staff that comes remotely close to the doors that lead to the surgery wing.

“Rambo and Willie have secured the,” Cowboy starts while still watching his mom. Stopping himself, he shakes his head before looking at us. “They got to Knuckles and his Ol’ Man. They are back in the barn and secured to the ring.” He runs his hand over his face. “I’m not sure what to do about this. I can’t differentiate between right and wrong. Or what’s not a reaction to my own fears that are running rampant because of everything.”

“Prez,” Turd butts in, “I know you have a lot on your mind, but what do Knuckles and his Ol’ Man have to do with any of this?”

Cowboy’s eyes go wide as he realizes he hasn’t shared what I told him. I can’t blame him. He’s been given so much to handle. I’m sure he’s having trouble organizing more than one thought at a time right now. I decide to take over. I’m the one who, in a way, caused this mess in the first place.

“After everything happened, I went to get Knuckles since he wasn’t answering his phone. When I got there, he was going crazy. His apartment is a damn mess and covered in pictures, stats, strings connecting it all. All of his monitors were going insane. I was trying to get him out of the apartment, but he was fighting me. Yelling about how this isn’t right. Something’s missing. Well, in the middle of that, his apartment door busted open. Given the shit that’s going on in our lives, I pulled my gun. I didn’t lower it, though. Not until Knuckles told me it was Whitley. But even then, I didn’t want to lower it. It was like I couldn’t. When Knuckles stepped in front of me, that’s when I did.” I pause and take in a deep breath. Letting it out, I place my hands on my hips and throw my head back. Once I’ve had my moment, I look back at my brothers and hit them with the truth bomb that’s caused this little meeting. “Turns out, Knuckles’ Ol’ Man is Mallard.”

I hear, “What the fuck?” and “You’re joking. Please, tell me he’s joking.” simultaneously, I couldn’t tell you who said it. Then Copper’s voice cuts in.

“What the hell do you mean, Whitley is Mallard? Mallard’s name isn’t Whitley.”

“I’m fucking telling you, the man that walked in and Knuckles claimed is his Ol’ Man is Mallard. I should fucking know. I’ve dealt with the son of a bitch on more than one occasion.”

“Knuckles said that his man was a ticket bitch,” Gears points out.

“Mallard was in Connard’s inner circle, but when I was fired, he was the one that packed my shit and told me to make sure I had everything I needed.” Copper states.

“But he was kicked out of Connard’s little bitch boy group.” Turd says.

“Does it fucking matter?!” Cowboy whisper shouts. “Knuckles has been fucking the enemy. We’re in the middle of this fucking war, and Knuckles is sleeping with one of the men associated with Connard. It doesn’t matter what he is to Connard now.”

Cowboy runs his hands up his face, pushing his hat off his head and letting it fall to the floor. Scratching back up his bald head, he drops his hands roughly to his legs. “This right here is what I mean. If Whitley, Mallard, whoever the fuck he is, isn’t one of Connard’s men, what do we do? What do we do if he is? Bigfoot was the fucking mole. We have the proof. What the hell has Knuckles been doing this whole time with his man?”

“He always seemed adamant he and Whitley never spoke about work or what we do within the MC,” Sever mentions.

“He’s always been protective about him, though. Could that be because he was trying to hide something from us?” Butcher asks. “Although I know liars, he never came across as one.”

“Neither did Bigfoot,” Gears mumbles. Butcher’s fists clench at his sides as he breathes out heavily through his nose.

“Regardless of how we feel, we aren’t going to get any answers standing here. They’ve been taken to the ring. Dizz, Angel, and Omen are on their way here. They’ll be here soon.” Cowboy interjects.

Everyone is clearly tired. This is all more than we ever signed up to deal with. Our family is falling apart, and it seems at every turn, something else happens to us.

“There’s more. Mallory is also here. Sto—” Cowboy starts before his voice breaks a little. Clearing his throat, he continues, “The lead that Knuckles gave him led Storm to Mallory. Whoever knew about Mallory must have gone to get her, but Storm beat them there. After doing…what they did, they stole Mallory back and….” I tune him out as he explains what Whitley-slash-Mallard told me about AJ and the accident.

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