Page 36 of Big Bad Single Wolf Dad

SARAH

“I’m happy to be anywhere you are,” I mutter to myself as I let myself inside the house.

The words keep echoing in my head as I make my way inside, even as I check on the kids who have long since gone to bed, blowing my “the kids need me” excuse.

But the longer I go over Greg’s words, the more I flip back and forth on whether I should take them at face value or whether that’s just a line he uses on all the women he’s dating.

Once I send Becky home, I sit down with a glass of wine and go over the evening’s strained conversation. I know I’m pulling back and shutting down, but the thought of potentially getting hurt again is way too scary.

I like Greg, I do, but the doubts that Eric has planted in my mind are looming large, especially as Greg becomes a bigger part of my life. The kids and I have been left before, and it’s not something I’m willing to put us through again.

If Greg really is seeing other women, there’s way too much risk that he could bail at any moment. It makes me wonder if I’m wasting my time with him and if I should just cut my losses now, while the kids and I will be relatively unscathed.

But the thought of it pains me.

“I’ll see where this goes,” I mutter to myself as I finish the wine and get ready for bed. For a date night, it’s an early one but I push the thought out of my mind as best I can. I just want to go to sleep before I overthink this whole thing even more.

But overthinking just seems to be what’s on the agenda over the next week as we meet up a couple more times with the kids. It seems like every second day I’m seeing Greg, and the more our families intertwine, the more nervous I get.

“Mom, come and play!” yell Mia and Ethan one day as we’re out on another park playdate. “And Greg, you too!”

Greg and I look at each other a little sheepishly, although it’s not like we were in the middle of a riveting conversation or anything. In fact, we’ve barely spoken all day, even though Greg seems to have been trying his best. But no matter what he says, I can’t help but clam up — the suspicions running through my head have gotten way too loud and drowned out even the most well-meaning questions.

At least I think they’re well-meaning. That’s the problem, I don’t really know.

“Coming!” I yell back at the kids, almost a little relieved for a break in the awkward silence that’s been growing between us.

When I find out what the game is, though, I immediately regret my enthusiasm.

“Okay, Mommy, you’re the princess,” Mia tells me as the other kids gather around excitedly.

“And Dad, you’re the knight that saves her,” Noah explains with a wide grin on his face.

“And the rest of us are vampires and werewolves!” Ethan giggles.

Greg and I look at each other, and it’s clear we’re both uncomfortable with this. I suddenly wonder how many princesses this knight has been courting lately, but I don’t get a chance to follow that thought for too long.

“Okay, go!” little Ollie yells, and I notice his eyes are glowing yellow.

These kids aren’t messing around, it seems, and I see the telltale fangs come out in my own kids’ mouths. I guess the game has begun, and there’s no getting out of it without seriously disappointing the kids, so I put on my best damsel-in-distress impression.

“Oh, no, a bunch of monsters are after me!” I wail, running from the kids. “Who will save me?”

The children giggle and squeal excitedly, chasing me around the park while Greg takes a valiant stance.

“I’ll save you!” he cries, but I can tell he’s not really into this game either. Nevertheless, he runs over and puts himself between me and the kids, brandishing an imaginary sword.

The kids don’t let up though, and they pretend-attack him on all sides. Noah and Ollie run around and tug at my hands, dragging me away while the others fend off Greg.

But of course, according to the kids’ demands, he manages to fight them off and goes to rescue me. With a mighty swipe of his sword, he gets Noah and Ollie to let go of me and then swoops me up in his arms.

I’m immediately taken aback by the contact. It’s the most intimate we’ve been in at least a week, and I can feel my body stiffen as he holds me close.

The game is still going on, the kids chasing Greg as he runs away with me in his arms, but my feelings are even more bewildering than the chaos around me.

So much of me wants to melt into his arms, laugh along with him and the kids like one big happy family, then collapse in a pile of cuddles and kisses.

But the thought of all that being ripped away again makes me unsure if I even want it in the first place. Before I can decide, Greg sets me down in what he’s arbitrarily designated as the ‘safe zone’ and turns away from me.

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