Page 121 of Marcus: Sins of the Father

“Gerald.” My throat closes. I don’t even have an argument to give him.

“She’s safer without you in her life, Marcus.” He says the words softly, as if that will make them hurt less.

He’s right. I failed her. My life is too dangerous. He deserves the admission I give him. “You’re right.” There’s a vise grip around my heart as images of the future I’d imagined with Brandy flash before my eyes and fade away like smoke. I hang up before Gerald can say anything more and before my voice cracks the way my heart just did.

***

I hear Brandy in the kitchen as I open her door.

“It’s me,” I call out. Since her kidnapping, I always make a point to announce myself.

“Hey, babe. I’m cooking spaghetti,” she yells from the other room.

I want to pretend everything’s okay. I want to sit down and have dinner and act like we did before, but I know I can’t do that to her. Her father was right. My life is what put her in danger, and I refuse to let that ever happen again.

I walk into the kitchen and stare at the sight before me. She’s humming a tune as she stirs the sauce, her back to me. I watch her for a bit longer, wanting to draw out this last moment before I destroy everything between us.

She glances over her shoulder and smiles, and I can’t put it off any longer.

“We need to talk.”

“Okay.” She sets her wooden spoon down and walks around the island to me, wrapping her arms around my waist.

I tuck a strand of hair back, then I let my thumb brush over her lips. I dip my head and take her mouth in a gentle kiss, knowing it will be our last. It’s tearing my heart out. I lift my head and stare into her beautiful, soulful eyes. “You mean the world to me, Brandy. You know that, don’t you?”

“Yes.” A small frown line forms on her brow. “Of course.”

“And I’d do anything for you.”

I see her take a breath and steel herself as if what’s coming is dawning on her. “But?”

“But…” I draw the word out. “My life is dangerous, too dangerous.”

“Stop right there,” she snaps, pushing out of my arms. “You don’t get to decide what’s too dangerous for me.”

“I could have lost you, and it would have been my fault. I’m doing this to protect you.”

“Doing what? Are you breaking up with me?” She pulls her chin to the side, her brows slashing down.

“It’s the only way I know to keep you protected. Being in my life isn’t safe.”

“That’s bullshit. You had no problem with me being around your life before. Now you’re going to run? You’re a coward.”

I look down and shake my head, knowing I probably deserve that, and glad it’s anger she’s releasing on me and not sadness. I don’t think I could handle her tears.

“They were going to use you for sex work. Don’t you get that? In your life, you are safe. In mine, you are not. It’s as simple as that.”

“Simple? So, this is simple to you?”

“That’s not what I meant.”

“I want to be in your life. I’m not going to let you push me away just because you’re scared.”

Her words are defiant. She’s a fighter. I guess I always knew that. It’s obvious she’s not going to let me end this unless I hurt her. I drag in a slow breath, and do the thing I didn’t want to have to do. I slice her with my words.

“What did you expect from this?” I wave my hand back and forth between us. “You had your time slumming. Now you need to go back to your real life, and I need to go back to mine. It was fun, don’t get me wrong, but we both know this would never work.”

My words do their job. Her face hardens, and her body stiffens as her walls start to erect. I feel her pulling back, but I need to finish it. Make sure she stays away for good. Make sure she goes back to her rich life, where she’s safe.

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