Page 86 of Gangster's Empire: Leeza & Havel

She’d smiled her way through the wedding, even appearing enthusiastic, which was a long way from her attitude toward marriage three weeks ago. It wasn’t his new bride herself that was bothering him, but his feelings toward her. It felt like the ring on his finger unleashed something primitive in him.

He despised having her out of his sight, couldn’t seem to keep his hands off her, and didn’t particularly care if the world burned around them so long as he got to be with her. This was a problem. What happened to the unemotional Havel of the past eight years? The Havel who could look at Leeza with cool indifference when he was in her presence.

Before that, before her marriage to Adam, when he’d been free to admire her, he’d kept his cool better than he was now. Maybe because she’d been younger, innocent, untouched. Now she was different.

She had a sexual awareness about her that drove him wild, while still seeming to retain the innocence of her youth. Not innocence. That wasn’t the right word. Optimism was better. Though she’d been through some rough times, she was still quick to smile and laugh or share a kind word with her bodyguards. She was devoted to her son in a way that made Havel both jealous and hopeful that she might one day shine her light of devotion on him as well.

He took another draw of the cigar, coughed, then pitched the disgusting thing off the balcony.

“You shouldn’t do that.” Leeza’s soft voice wrapped around him like a cocoon.

“Smoke?”

“That and toss it off the balcony while still lit. You could hurt someone.”

He turned, drawing in a sharp breath at the sight of her. “Jesus fuck.”

She smiled, leaning casually against the balcony door in a black silk bathrobe that gaped open to reveal her nudity. Her skin glowed in the soft light blanketing the city below them.

“Fucking hell.” He couldn’t seem to get anything but profanity past his lips.

She laughed. “You’ve seen me naked before.”

“Not like this.” His voice was a gruff growl. “Not as my woman.”

The laughter fell from her face as she studied him. “I think I’ve always been your woman. I’m sorry it took me so long to figure it out.”

The easy relationship they’d been developing over the past weeks fell away and the moment became fraught with tension. It was strange to feel none of the rage that had lived inside him for so many years. He no longer blamed Leeza for marrying Adam. What choice did she have? He’d only blamed her because he couldn’t stand to look at his own actions.

He’d allowed his pride to dictate his thoughts and feelings. He’d let her go rather than fight for her. He’d chosen not only pride, but his job, his friendship with Jozef, even Krystoff, over her. She’d been alone, forced to marry a monster and he’d turned his back on her.

It seemed so clear now, as he drank in the nude form of his wife. She was everything to him and he’d proved himself unworthy of her love.

He dropped to his knees in front of her, startling her. Bowing his head, he said, “I’m not a man of words and I don’t know how to tell you how sorry I am for letting you go eight years ago. The regret is… fuck… it’s crushing.”

She lowered down to her knees in front of him, wrapping her arms around his shoulders and tucking her head against his neck. “I have regrets too, Havel, but we’re together now and it’s time to let them go.”

He gently took her chin and raised her face to his. “How can I forgive myself for the way I’ve treated you? For not doing what I should have done to your fuck of an ex-husband the first time I saw a bruise on you.”

The corner of her lips lifted. “Most of my bruises from the past several years have come from Crav Maga training, not Adam.”

He gripped her arms. “I’m serious.”

She cupped his face. “We have to let go of the past.” Her gaze grew distant. “Like Dasha and Krystoff. They despised each other for the first years of their marriage. I was old enough to remember the terrible fights they had. Then mom nearly died giving birth to Saskia and everything changed. Krystoff realized she was precious to him.”

“Not sure I like being compared to your parents, but I get your point.” Could he forget the past? Set aside the ugly feelings of rage and jealousy every time he thought of Adam touching her. Could he forget his complicity in marrying her to a monster, his inaction, his regret?

“You said you weren’t a man of words?” she murmured, her lips moving whisper soft against his throat as she kissed a path to his jaw. “Which means you must be a man of action.”

“You know it, lásko.”

“Then show me.” Her husky voice, the scent of jasmine oil clinging to her skin from her bath, the touch of her soft breasts against his chest, all sparked a voracious need in him.

He wanted to devour her, to push her back onto the floor and take her like a beast, to imprint himself on every part of her, cage her in, make her his.

His hands shook as he dragged her against his body, absorbing her warmth and softness. He wrapped his arms around her, crushing her to him, his lips smashing down on hers in a heated kiss.

He spoke to her without words, his hands spanning her waist, sliding over her, touching every part of her with such desperation he knew it would never be enough. Their marriage vows broke something in him. A dam he’d created to hold back everything he felt for her.

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