Page 86 of As Thick As Thieves

“My foster mom gave me this as a gift,” I said quietly as I kept playing, Penn blinking at me as she tried to process that I’d said something. “She was the only person in my life who I’d ever call a parent.”

“Was?” she finally whispered.

“She was killed in a home invasion. My foster brother’s biological junkie dad found him and tried to take him. Ethan had told us a lot of stories about his dad, and Mom promised him he’d never have to see him again.” My chest went tight at the memories, and I swallowed past the lump in my throat, focusing on the sounds coming from the guitar. “I was in juvie for stealing millions of dollars from some old rich fucker in Kingslake. I’d been trying to help Mom since I knew she was struggling, but I didn’t cover my tracks properly and ended up getting arrested. I was fifteen. Mom and Ethan’s visits always gave me something to look forward to in there, but when they didn’t show up that day, I just knew something was wrong.” I could feel Drake’s eyes on me, but I didn’t look at him. He knew how long it had taken me to calm down from being that angry, bitter little boy. Having him and the guys in juvie had definitely helped, but it had been a long road. They’d seen me at my weakest, and even though Knox and Stone acted like they didn’t give a shit, they looked out for me when I was lost in my grief.

“What happened to Ethan? Did his dad take him?” Penn asked with wide eyes, her hand sliding onto my knee to comfort me.

“He was beaten pretty badly, but he managed to get away. We lived in a quiet neighborhood, so the cops had already been called and his dad was arrested. Ethan got placed in another foster home after that, and we’re still in contact. He lives further south, so we don’t really hang out anymore. He just finished college.”

“I wish I could’ve met your mom,” she smiled softly, shuffling closer. “Did she teach you to play?”

“She knew basic stuff, but when it was obvious I needed more, she had someone come and give me lessons. I tried to convince Ethan to play too so we could form a band, but he wasn’t a fan of that idea,” I chuckled, the look on his face still clear in my mind as he’d scrunched his nose and looked at me like I was a psycho.

“What was his thing? Did he like sports? Art?”

“He’s always been into fast cars and bikes. He’s a bit of an adrenaline junkie. Mom would be so pissed to know he got his bike license, let alone how he rides it.” We lapsed into a comfortable silence, the only sound being the guitar, and Knox cleared his throat before speaking, surprising me.

“My foster dad used to beat me all the time when I was younger. I was only taken away from him when I ended up in the hospital with a broken arm and ribs from falling off the swing at school. They found all the bruises I’d been hiding under my shirt and called child protection services.”

I’d heard a little about Knox’s past, but not a lot. Drake was the only one who knew all the dark details.

“Thank fuck you got out of there,” Penn answered, not hiding the sadness in her voice. “Did they find you a better foster home?”

Knox didn’t reply, and Drake gave him a gentle nudge. “You can tell her, babe.”

I looked away from them, focusing on the guitar and acting like I wasn’t there. Knox knew I’d hear him, but it was obvious he was only opening up for Penn, not me. I wasn’t expecting what he said next, and I did well not to react.

“My new foster home was worse. I was ten, and I spent the next five years there being sexually assaulted until I got locked up for carjacking. The foster mom appeared to be the sweetest woman on earth, but it was all an act. She ignored the kids once she got them into her care, letting her husband do what he wanted with us. One of the girls was eleven when she killed herself, and I just knew he was hurting her in the same ways he was hurting me. They put on a big act about how she’d been bullied at school and they’d been trying to help her, which meant I was still stuck there with one other boy. He was only seven, and at this point I was thirteen. I tried to keep him safe, but in doing so, I only made myself a bigger target.”

“He raped you?” Penn choked out, intending on getting to her feet, but Knox snapped at her.

“Don’t fucking coddle me over it. It was eleven years ago, I’m over it.”

She flinched at his tone, and I lifted my eyes to his across the fire. “She cares about you, man. You could’ve just said you didn’t want to be comforted. You know she’ll respect your space.”

“Fuck off, Cruz. This has nothing to do—”

“Yes, it does. She’s my girl too, and you’re being a dick. It’s okay to not want affection, but just say it nicely,” I cut in, placing the guitar beside me to slide an arm around Penn. He stood and stalked off, and Drake put his hand out to stop Penn when she went to follow. “Leave him, baby. I’ll make sure he’s okay. Trust me, that took a lot for him to tell you, but he doesn’t want you making a fuss about it or pitying him.”

She nodded, watching Drake wander off into the darkness, and she let out a sigh. “Why do I always fuck things up with him?”

“Hey,” I frowned, tugging her onto my lap so that she was facing me, not that I could see her expression properly now that the flames were behind her. “You know he’s not the type to share personal things, so now he’s just freaking out a little. It probably didn’t help that I was here, he’s never told me much about his past either.”

“I just want to take it all away for him,” she whispered, resting her forehead on mine. “To take all the pain away from all of you.”

“I love you for that, but you can’t, baby. It’s part of us, we just learned to live with it. Knox hides his under anger, Drake hides his under his jokes, and I hide mine by helping others. It’s never going to go away, but it fades a little more each day. You help soothe it just by being here, I promise.”

“You help soothe mine, too,” she murmured, her lips pressing against mine as she gave me a slow, lazy kiss.

Chapter Nineteen

Penn

Knox had politely eaten dinner at the table with us after he’d left the firepit, but he’d excused himself and asked where he was sleeping, making my heart sink. Estelle had shown him the guest room, not batting an eye as Drake followed Knox into the room as they’d said goodnight. Cruz and I had slept on the couch, neither of us getting much sleep.

He’d stayed awake to keep an eye out the window for threats, and I’d been awake worrying about Knox.

“Morning,” Estelle chirped as she wandered into the kitchen at seven, finding Cruz and I already sitting at the table with coffee in front of us.