Page 25 of Fling

‘Are you implying that I’m JEALOUS? OF CELINE? Is that what this whole fight is about? You’re annoyed I’m not a Yummy Mummy pushing out loads of babies and having your favourite dinner ready on the table as soon as you walk in?’ Tara said, shocked.

‘Ugh, you always do this. Stop turning everything into a feminist lecture,’ Colin sighed.

‘It’s hard not to when my manchild of a husband throws a tantrum over me not cooking his favourite din-dins!’

‘Anytime I offer to cook, you say no!’

‘That’s because the only meal you can make is chicken nuggets and chips!’

‘They’re chicken tenders, Tara, and you know that! You want me to do something and when I offer to do it, you say no. You’re a barrel of contradictions!’

‘Did you just call me a barrel?’ Tara said, appalled. ‘Well, seeing as I make more money than you, maybe you should have steak ready for me when I walk in the door. Now that I think of it, maybe I need a stay-at-home husband.’

‘Salary isn’t everything, Tara. I have investments. I work smart, not hard,’ Colin said, folding his arms.

‘Working smart? Is that what you call messing with Rory all day long? You know, I think he’s rubbing off on you too much. You’re starting to smell like toxic masculinity,’ Tara said.

‘Or maybe your lapdog just still has some bite left in him. Maybe I finally have the balls to address the elephant in the room,’ he said.

‘OK, so first I’m a barrel, now I’m an elephant?’ Tara said, misinterpreting his point.

‘You’re not the elephant! The elephant is the fact that we’re unhappy! I took out the two steaks so we could have a nice meal together! It’s like you’ve given up on everything! Dinner, sex, the future, everything. It’s like you’ve just checked out of this relationship.’

‘I told you I’m at a spiritual crossroads, I’m trying to realign with my destiny!’

‘I’m not letting you get away with those kinds of excuses any more, Tara. This isn’t going to be like the time you rear-ended my car in the driveway and blamed it on some planet!’

‘For the last time, Colin, Mercury was in retrograde! That’s hardly my fault!’

‘I’m not putting up with this nonsense any more. Your head might be in the stars Tara, but it’s about time someone brought you back down to earth!’

The microwave dinged to signal Colin’s food was ready.

‘Oh look, my dinner is ready. A lovely, lukewarm dinner for our lovely, lukewarm marriage,’ he said, taking it out of the microwave.

‘You know, men should be careful telling women to get back in the kitchen. That’s where we keep the knives. Who knows, maybe my destiny is to be the focus of a true-crime documentary,’ Tara said, taking a victory sip of wine as if the fight was over.

‘I’ll have dinner in the living room so my toxic masculinity doesn’t accidentally smother you,’ Colin said smugly.

‘Great. And while you’re at it, why don’t you sleep on the couch tonight so my pillow doesn’t accidentally smother you,’ she replied peevishly.

Colin gave her a passive-aggressive smile as he left the kitchen.

Chapter 8

Tara and Colin spent the rest of the evening avoiding each other in a somewhat theatrical manner. When one entered a room, the other left dramatically. It seemed the built-up resentment had finally come to a head. Colin hadn’t planned for things to escalate the way they did, but he was relieved that the underlying issues had finally been brought to the surface. He didn’t think steak would be the tipping point that drove them both over the edge, but then again, it wasn’t really about the steak.

Colin didn’t mind sleeping on the couch, although it was a little dusty. He did, of course, have the option of sleeping in the spare room but the idea scared him a little. It seemed like a permanent solution to a temporary problem. He feared if he moved to the spare room, he would never move back to his own bed with Tara. That wasn’t what he wanted. He loved her more than anything, after all. They were just in a rut and acknowledging that fact was the first step towards getting out of it. He grabbed a blanket from the closet and tucked himself in the couch.

As he lay there, he couldn’t help but replay the fight in his head. Colin always found himself thinking of snappy comebacks after an argument had ended. He was hopeless on the spot. Tara had a sharper tongue, that had always been the case. When they were younger and Colin knew he was losing a fight, he would grab her and kiss her to shut her up. It was the only way to win against her. It was his trump card, the hidden ace up his sleeve.

Any tension between them was always of a sexual nature. Whenever they fought, there was a certain chemistry to it, an erotic undercurrent charging below. They were always able to harness that power into passionate sex and get the release they both craved. But Colin felt as if Tara didn’t want to be grabbed and kissed any more. He wanted to make a move but her body language wasn’t communicating that she wanted it. Now they were both trapped in a prison of their own design, desperate for a release that would never come.

His mind drifted to Claire once again. He wondered if she was also unhappy in her marriage. The fact that she was on Fling meant she would probably be able to relate to his situation. Colin opened Fling on his phone and saw that he had an 82 per cent match with SANDRA, 35 – DUBLIN and she had sent him a message.

Sandra: Wow, 82% match. We must be perfect for each other hahahahaha

Hello????? Are you there??????

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