Page 36 of Fling

‘Well, that’s a bit generous, Emily, but thank you,’ Tara said, flattered. ‘Although I still can’t quite believe I had the confidence to walk into a sex shop and not care what people think.’

‘Tara, can I let you in on a little secret?’

‘By all means.’

‘Confidence isn’t just when you stop caring what people think. It’s when you stop thinking that people care. Usually when you think people are judging you, it’s all in your head.’

‘You’re right,’ Tara said, looking around. ‘I have nothing to be ashamed of.’

‘Then my work here is done. The student has become the master. Or should I say . . . the mistress,’ Emily said proudly.

‘Thanks so much for your help, Emily. I hope this is still valuable experience for your CV.’

‘Content creation is a very important skill these days.’

‘OK, let me just change out of this before we go,’ Tara said, pulling the curtain closed.

‘Nope,’ Emily said, pulling the curtain back open. She grabbed Tara’s pair of granny knickers off the floor. ‘These are going in the bin.’

Chapter 12

As Colin put on Rory’s gym gear in the locker room, he found it to be a little tight around his waist. ‘Aren’t gym clothes supposed to be comfortable?’ he asked, frustrated.

‘No, rookie mistake,’ Rory explained. ‘The gym is where I pick up most women. It’s full of raw sexual instinct. We’re in the wild here. Pure Darwinian natural selection.’

‘I don’t think women even really care that much about muscles.’

‘They say they don’t, which means they do. I didn’t invent jungle law, Colin. I just obey it. And if my gym gear is too tight, don’t be discouraged. Try and keep your chins up.’

‘I’m not fat!’ Colin said defensively.

‘Oh stop taking everything I say so seriously, I’m only winding you up. You’re actually in decent shape. But we need to get you a good pump for these pics.’

Rory led Colin on to the gym floor. It wasn’t overly busy but Colin was still intimidated by all the v-shaped backs and rock hard abs. He had got into weightlifting in college and gained an impressive amount of strength in the one year he attended the college gym. But his testosterone levels would have been a lot higher back then so he would likely be starting from scratch now.

‘OK, so first things first, we need to discuss your problem areas,’ Rory said when they arrived in the free weights section.

Colin looked in the mirror as Rory circled him, scanning his body for flaws.

‘Right, so the overall problem is that you have a dad bod,’ Rory concluded.

‘How can I have a dad bod? I’m not even a dad!’ Colin said, annoyed by the term.

‘Doesn’t stop you telling dad jokes, does it? Look, you’re not fat, but you’re not exactly toned either. But don’t worry, you’re giving me a lot to work with here. I see a lot of potential.’

‘This feels like that show Queer Eye that Tara watches. Except you’re a flaming heterosexual.’

‘The good news is, you’re in a very good position to tone up,’ Rory continued. ‘We just need to focus on burning some fat. Think of your fat as a marble sculpture, we just need to chisel some off to reveal the muscle underneath.’

‘I think that makes sense.’

‘Now, personally, the only cardio I do is sex,’ Rory said, raising his voice so an attractive woman in leggings would hear. ‘But that’s not really an option for you. Instead, I think you should focus on good old-fashioned heavy lifting.’

Colin was intimidated by the idea, considering how long it had been since he was last in shape. Still, Rory did have a great physique and he was willing to trust his advice. Personal trainers were expensive after all, and Colin was essentially getting one for free.

Rory had even set up his own PT business when he was twenty-five that he claimed would ‘change the face of fitness’. He had bought a van, filled it with gym equipment and began travelling door-to-door, taking the gym directly to his clients. It was a good idea on paper, but in retrospect, the brand name ‘Jehovah’s Fitness’ may not have been the best the decision.

‘OK, teach me more, guru,’ Colin said, inflating Rory’s ego.

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