Page 66 of Cover Up

“Kind of. I got arrested, and I was ordered thirty days outpatient as part of my probation, but I’m going to stay in it longer,” she admitted.

“Are you allowed to come see her?” he asked.

She took several breaths before she answered him. “Probably, yeah, but I don’t think I’m going to.”

That was the answer he was expecting. Sofia’s first major spiral had come on the heels of their mom forgetting her name for the first time, and it had only gotten worse after that. All he could really do was hope she wouldn’t live to regret her choice.

“If you promise to pick up, I’ll call you when I get home.”

“When?”

“Probably tomorrow,” Dei told her.

“Why are you in California?” she asked him.

Dei laughed. “That’s not your business, and I don’t really feel like telling you.”

“You know what?” she started, then stopped again and let out a calming breath. “Dei, I need to hang up now. I love you. So much. But I’m not really in a place right now where I can talk to you without falling apart. I’m sorry.” And then the line was dead.

Shock stole over him—some because of his mom, but mostly because of Sofia, and anger was quick on its heels. Behind that was a powerful, endless feeling of grief because he wasn’t even allowed to be angry at her for trying to get better.

It’s what their mom would have wanted.

Dei knew enough about addiction to know that the only way Sofia was going to get to a place where she could be healthy was if she was entirely focused on herself. But a part of him wanted to scream that she’d been putting herself first for longer than he could remember, and it felt so fucking unfair she’d chosen this moment—the moment when his mother was reaching the end of her life—to decide it was time for all this.

He eventually let the phone go, and it clattered to the deck beside him. His head thudded back hard against the stucco, and he didn’t move, even when he heard the sliding door open again and Felix’s soft, bare steps padding over to him. Dei didn’t do much besides move slightly to the right to give Felix room to cuddle up under his stump, and Dei laid his cheek against his lover’s head.

A warm, stubbled cheek rubbed against the sensitive end of his arm, and Felix pressed a kiss to that tender spot before wrapping an arm around Dei’s middle.

“How much of that did you hear?”

“Enough to know I shouldn’t ask questions right now,” Felix told him.

Dei laughed, the sound a little pained, but he still felt a small pulse of joy, which was odd considering how much it all hurt.

“We need to leave, don’t we?”

“I’m so sorry, darlin’. I know you weren’t done showing me around,” Dei said, but Felix interrupted him with a laugh.

“My sweet, amazing, wonderful man. This is all I really wanted with you. The rest was details.”

Dei tucked those words behind his ribs and held them close to his heart. “How about we stop by the cemetery on the way to the airport. Likely enough we’re not gettin’ a flight out of here until late, so we might as well let you say your goodbyes.”

Felix let out a slow breath. “I think…I think I already said them. I mean, it’s just a piece of granite with her name on it. She’s not even interned there. My mom took her ashes home.”

Dei bowed his head. “Ah, my sugar…”

Felix grinned and kissed his stump again. “My baby.”

Dei felt a profound, intense warmth in his chest at those words. He lifted his gaze, then used his finger to tilt Felix’s head up. “The doctor said she was hanging in there, so we can wait a few days if you want to. I promise it’s okay.”

“No,” Felix said. “I don’t need that. I need to know you’re home with her.”

Dei turned slightly and cupped Felix’s chin. It felt like his heart was bleeding out in his chest. “Oh, sweet thing. What if you regret it?”

“Then I can fly back,” Felix said. “The funeral’s over. I saw my family, and anything that needed to be said already was. There were other things I wanted to show you, but they’re not important enough.”

“Felix…”

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