Page 52 of Cover Up

Felix bowed his head. Fucking hell. If he rejected Dei now, there’d be no coming back from it. It would destroy what little progress Dei had made with himself, and Felix wasn’t sure he could take the risk. He didn’t think his dick would cooperate, but maybe if he—

“I’m putting you right under those covers, and you’re gonna nap,” Dei went on, giving Felix a small push toward the bedroom. “You hear me?”

Felix’s gaze snapped up. “I thought you were saying you wanted to, you know…” He managed to stop himself before his lack of filter got him in any more trouble.

Dei’s eyes went a little wide, and then he laughed and curled his hand around the back of Felix’s neck. “Honey, I want that a whole lot with you. I’m over my hang-ups, and if you were feelin’ better, I’d show you exactly how you make me feel. But I can tell you don’t need that right now. So I can wait as long as you need me to. You been patient enough for me. I can do the same for you.”

Felix licked his lips and felt the powerful urge to cry. “Yeah, okay,” he managed to get out in a soft whisper. “Thank you.”

Dei’s face fell a little, and he took another step closer. “Oh, sweet thing. You want company, or do you need to be alone?”

That question was almost impossible to answer because he wanted both in equal measure. He didn’t want to sleep. Hell, he didn’t want to blink for too long because it meant forgetting Dei’s face, and that made him want to tear his skull open and rearrange the parts of his damaged brain until they worked properly again.

But he also needed time to curl up in a ball, scream into a pillow until the tight grief in his chest let go a little, and then sleep until the weight of the day eased up off his shoulders. And he didn’t want to do all of that with Dei watching.

“Maybe a nap by myself, yeah.”

Dei chuckled very softly and dragged his thumb over the cut of Felix’s jaw. “Come on, sweetness. I’ll get you all tucked in.”

Felix felt warm again, but not from embarrassment or humiliation. It was similar to the feeling he got whenever the guys took care of him, only there were far more layers with Dei. He wanted a thousand and one things with him, most of which he couldn’t name, but they felt amazing. And the fact that Dei was willing to be patient with him meant more than he could ever say.

Walking into the room, Felix stared at the massive bed and felt the urge to laugh at the absurdity of the situation, though he managed to keep the sound inside. He kicked off his uncomfortable dress shoes, but before he could go for his shirt, Dei spun him around and used a curled finger to tip his chin up.

“I want you to know that more’n anything, I want to undress you, but I still haven’t figured out small buttons with one hand.”

“That’s fine,” Felix breathed out. “Do you need me to help you with yours?”

“If you wouldn’t mind,” Dei said.

Felix knew how hard that admission had to be for him, so he quickly went to work on Dei’s button-up, moving as quickly as he could until the broad, scarred chest was exposed. Felix had done his fair share of staring over the last twenty-four hours, but not like this.

Not this close.

Now, he let his gaze linger, let his fingers graze a touch over his firm pecs and over his stomach, which was hairy and soft.

“Used to be a lot more fit,” Dei murmured.

Felix snorted as he looked up into Dei’s eyes, and he realized the man wasn’t joking. “You’re literally the hottest man I have ever laid eyes on. And please don’t tell me it’s because my memory is swiss cheese.”

Dei swallowed heavily. “I’d never.”

Felix wasn’t sure he believed him, but it didn’t matter. The way Dei was looking at him told him his words were important. That they meant something. He took in a deep breath and let it out, listening to the way it trembled with fatigue, grief, and all the ache of wanting this man for so long.

“Wake me up in an hour or two,” Felix said.

“Sugar—”

Felix cut him off by grabbing his wrist and wrapping Dei’s arm around him. He laid the man’s large, firm palm against his ass cheek. “Wake me up like this.”

Dei let out the softest groan, then collapsed forward and buried his face in the crook of Felix’s neck. “You’re gonna kill me, sweetness.”

“Little deaths only, right?”

Dei laughed, his breath warm and wet. “So goddamn many when I get my way.” He pulled back and searched Felix’s face for a long moment. “I’d like to kiss you one more time before you get some shut-eye.”

“Yes,” Felix said without an ounce of hesitation. “Please.” He didn’t wait for Dei this time. He lifted his hands and pressed his palms to Dei’s rough cheeks, enjoying the sensation of an overgrown, soft, short beard against his skin.

Dei smiled, his face transforming and becoming somehow even more beautiful than before, and Felix felt it like it was something physical. There were no words necessary between them as their gazes locked, and then Felix leaned in, and Dei met him halfway.

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