Page 60 of Heal For Me

“Second, your grandpa is looking down at you and smiling, Pay, and he will be with you wherever you go, so you need to live your life to the fullest for him. And third”—she rips my letters from my hands and waves them in the air above her head—“this proves that you and Ash Pearson are soulmates. What man is writing fucking letters and without the possibility of pussy? I’ll tell you—none. That shit is only in movies and horny books and yet here you are with a whole stack of them, his nanny’s ring around your neck and you’re still doubting his feelings? Baby”—she squeezes my hand tightly—“I don’t know what else that man can do to prove his love to you. He has your name tattooed onto him, Pay. That’s a bitch to cover up, so, you know, he must be serious.”

God, I love my best friend. I throw myself at her, and we squeeze each other so tight breathing is difficult.

“You’ve hardly been living for years, P. It’s time you live your life to the fullest and”—she pushes me to arm’s length—“I know the perfect start.”

“Oh yeah, what’s that?”

Her face splits with a huge grin, and my own grows to match because it’s contagious. She leans forward, crowding my space again, then shouts way louder than she needs to that I’m tempted to cover my ears.

“London, baby!”

25

Payson

“Are we really doing this?” I’ve never been a nervous flyer, but I’ve also never flown over an ocean before. I grip onto my backpack straps as we head down the hall to get onto our plane.

“Hell yes we are!” Janelle cheers.

I cannot believe we are actually flying to the UK. I’ve never even been to Canada, and that’s only a few hours away, and now I’m flying to a whole new continent to surprise my fiancé. I wanted to tell him, and it was extremely difficult not to immediately call him when I got my phone back, but Janelle made me promise I wouldn’t. She’s really living her rom-com fantasy through me. I tried telling her Ash isn’t the surprise type, but she only hears what she wants, and what she wanted to hear was “London, baby!” and nothing else, so here we are. Thanks very kindly to her dad for using his miles so we could get first-class seats for not even the price of economy. I don’t have the money for either, but Janelle insisted on paying—with her parents money. I’ll pay them back as soon as I get my inheritance.

That will be the next thing I do, ask Uncle Jet if I can dip into my savings, but he doesn’t know about this trip. I’m sure he will by the time I step off the plane because I’m pretty sure he has people follow me around, but there’s not much he can do once I’m there, I hope. I really shouldn’t push it because he might even be there waiting for me when we get off, ready to rip me a new one. He visits me monthly, sometimes more, but he doesn’t stay in the room with me. I’m not sure he would even fit on their cots. When Ash stayed, it proved to be wildly difficult for us to sleep on my bed, especially when Todd tried to get up with us as well.

We step onto the plane, and my ears tune into classical music playing over the speakers. “Oh my word.” I stifle a giggle.

Janelle squeals before spinning to face me. “It’s so British, isn’t it? Oh sorry, innit?”

This will be a very long trip. “I’ve never once heard Ash say innit.”

“He’s not the only British person in the world, I bet we will hear it before we head back home.”

I hope we do, for her sake.

Finding our seat is easy enough, but the plane is massive. First class is small enough though. Probably because the price is crazy, and normal people can’t pay it. I swallow hard, thinking just how much Janelle’s parents paid for this. I wonder if I’ll ever be rich enough that spending money isn’t always such a big deal. I guess when I marry Ash, but that’s not my money, that’s his. He will argue and say it’s the same, but I want to make my own money somehow.

Janelle’s seat is diagonal from mine but still close, and we are facing each other. There is the option to block off the seats, but we leave our divider down.

“What time will it be when we get there?”

“Like ten. That’s why we took such a late flight so Ash’s mom wouldn’t have to pick us up at such an ungodly time.” Not that she minded. Thankfully, Ash gave me her number and address in a letter, so I looked back and called her when we made this last-minute decision. I had to make sure she didn’t let Ash know it was me, so I texted her first. She nearly cried when I told her our plan. I’ve never met her face-to-face, but I feel like I’ve known her for years.

Janelle whips out her neck rest and tears open the fuzzy blue blanket provided for each seat. I do the same. It’s a long flight, but with it being so late in the night, I’m hoping I am able to sleep most of it.

First class is nearly full now, and the chatter around us is filled with accents. Mostly British but a few Irish, I think. I’ve never seen Janelle look so excited, and her head keeps whipping in whatever direction the voice is the clearest.

Some lady in the seat across the aisle from me has been on the phone since we boarded and we’ve been not-so-subtly ease dropping. Not just because of her accent either, but because she’s been yapping at someone about how she doesn’t know why she’s heading to her ex’s funeral when she wishes she was the one to off him. Bold statement, especially on a plane, but maybe her ex is a pos.

I look down at my pajamas, and her matching pantsuit. She looks ready for first class, unlike Janelle and I who are dressed for comfort. Bedtime is more like it. Her nails are long, and she’s in full glam with her hair pulled into a sliced back pony. She looks rich, like, rich rich.

She flips her wrist. “We land at half ten.”

“Well, it’s only a ten-minute tube ride, innit?”

The moment that word leaves her mouth, I shoot a look at Janelle. She’s nearly bouncing in her seat with joy, and I laugh.

“I’m going to love it here,” she whispers loudly.

“Maybe you need to get you an English boy, after all.” I pump my eyebrows and look around the cabin. First class is where everyone should find a man, that way you know they are rich enough to afford trips.

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