Page 61 of Heal For Me

“Any of them besides the one I’ll be forced to stay with.”

She means Henry, Ash’s brother. I don’t actually know why she hates him, but if he’s anything like Ash, I get it. If I didn’t love Ash, I might hate him and his arrogance too.

The captain comes over the loudspeaker, and this time I join in with Janelle and her celebration. Not only is his voice amazing but I’m finally relaxing enough that I’m excited.

Just one little flight and I’ll get to feel my man’s arms around me again.

I can’t wait.

26

Ash

It’s too bloody hot to be working in the garden, but Mum insists on having a fountain installed today, the hottest day in June yet. It’s not like the queen is coming round the house, so I don’t know what the hurry is, but Dad has never told her no and he’s not going to start now. Even if it is twenty-eight outside.

I hope Parker is doing okay at football camp this week. I’m sure the coaches know how to deal with the heat, but I might make a call when we are done here to check. I don’t need him having a heat stroke.

He’s loving it here, though. A little more than I wanted, but I can’t blame him. Football is huge here and it excites most everyone, where in America there are so many popular sports, and football—our kind—isn’t one of the tops. Good players still come from there, but I know how good it feels when the people around you are excited about the sport you play. That’s why I moved from here.

Plus, I think he likes being around his grandparents, and I know they love having him around. I’ve seen a different side to him, a happier side. He hasn’t been in a bad mood, and we’ve not argued once. Our time here has been my favorite thing, but there is a knot in the back of my mind that gets bigger every time I think about going back to America. Obviously, I will need to. That’s where my house is, my job, and my girl. I can’t simply move here, but if I think about Parker’s happiness, I wonder if I can. Maybe even work at the firm for my parents for a while, but that would be a last resort. I never wanted to join the family business; I left that up to my brother.

But then there is Payson. She’s not in Bayshore, but she will be. And then what? She has an entire year of school left and then college. That’s why I was so persistent on her working on her missing schoolwork. I can’t have her being held back another year, because I don’t even know how I’m going to get through this one. We haven’t discussed what will happen when she goes to college, and I can’t ask her to do online classes and follow me around like a lost puppy. I can’t ask because I know she would. I’m trying not to demand things from Payson and let her live her life how she chooses, but fucking hell, is it hard. If she followed me, I’m not even sure I would be one hundred percent happy with that outcome either. She’s basically been in a prison her entire life, maybe not literally, but I don’t want to make her feel like she missed out on anything. After missing out on a proper childhood, she deserves a proper university life. Without all the hooking up.

The therapist I’ve been seeing—per Mum’s request—tells me I have excessive control mannerisms, who knew. It’s what makes me a good coach but can make me a difficult person to have relationships with, is what he said. Especially in my relationship with Payson where there is already an excessive power imbalance.

I don’t listen to everything he says, but I believe him to be pretty on the head with that fact. Therapy wasn’t on my radar, but Mum guilt tripped me by saying if Payson is bettering herself, I should do the same. This is why I will need my own place right away if I do move here. Mum is a thorn in my ass. She means well and she’s been right so far—which you will never hear me admit out loud, but I am no longer a child who needs bossing around. And according to my therapist, I do not enjoy being told what I can and cannot do. Like I said, he’s been right a few times. Doesn’t take a bloke with a degree on the wall to tell me I can be pigheaded.

“I’m running into the city.” Mum steps out of the house, already eyeing our progress and judging it. We are almost done, and she seems pleased.

“That time already?” Dad glances at his watch, then curses.

“William,” Mum scolds and a sloppy grin stretches his old skin.

“Sorry, love.”

“Mhm. Just make sure you boys are cleaned up for tea. We are having guests.” Mum and Dad swap an odd look I don’t quite understand, but they basically talk in their own language most of the time. Comes from years of being together, apparently. I hope one day that is Payson and me.

“Who?” Henry asks, obviously not in the loop like myself.

“You’ll see. Finish up and clean up.”

Dad jogs forward and says his goodbyes, then opens her car door for her. Henry lifts an eyebrow, and I just shrug. Mum is constantly having people over for small get-togethers, she’s an entertainer by default. I just hope whoever is coming is someone I will enjoy being around. The couple she had over last week were wankers. Bragging about this and that and all the things their money could buy. Whatever they were bragging about isn’t even a lick in the pot of what my parents hold, but we aren’t braggers. The truly wealthy people aren’t. Growing up, I was surrounded by fake rich people with flashy jewelry and cars. That’s never been us even though my parents own and run the biggest firm in the country.

There has been chatter about spreading over to America, but that’s not been done yet. Dad wants to find someone he trusts to run a branch since he is retired now. They asked me years ago, but I turned the opportunity down. Suits have never been my thing. Henry seems like the obvious choice, but it’s not surprising why Dad doesn’t trust him. He’s been a loose cannon ever since losing Bridget. Now that I have Payson and have been in the position where I thought I would lose her, I understand more than I used to. It used to drive me batty getting calls from my mum because Henry was off fucking around, passing out in parks and shit, but if he loved her like I love Payson . . . I can’t even imagine how I would have been if she didn’t wake up. I look at my brother in a new light, and even though he grates on me like no one else, I see how much pain he is in, and I’ve done my best to be easier on him than I used to be.

Dad returns with a new pep in his step after sending Mum off. We ask about it, but he shrugs us off saying we will understand in a while. I don’t bloody understand why my parents are acting so strange, but I don’t particularly care either. It’s almost time for Payson to call me, and we need to get done so I can talk with her.

We make haste working on the fountain, and two hours later, it’s completed. The natural stone fits in well with the large house. Really brings the form of the place together, I guess that was Mum’s vision.

Dad passes me a beer, and the three of us clink cans.

“Good work, boys.”

“Not bad, aye. Mum should be happy,” Henry replies before tipping his can back and chugging.

Dad chuckles. “Yes, she will want one by the pool now. She’s mentioned it a time or two and I think this will be the push she needs.”

Brilliant. I can’t complain about the work, it’s hot, but it’s been nice working with my family like we used to. The house Mum, Dad, and Henry live in wasn’t always marble floors and delicate crown molding. When we first moved in, after the firm kicked off, it was a shit hole. Took years of blood, sweat, and tears to make it the place it is now, but that’s when I fell in love with fixing up things. Dad saw the potential in the run-down place with missing floorboards and a giant hole in the roof, and I’m pleased to say I see the same possibilities now. That’s why I didn’t mind that my place in America was run-down. I bought it, not only for the location, but because I saw what it could be.

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