Page 98 of Heal For Me

“I promise I’m not. I’m yours until August.”

He squeezes me again before pushing me to arms length and lifting a cocky eyebrow. “You are mine forever, babygirl. Not just until then.”

40

Epilogue One

Payson

I always loved the rain, so I guess I was destined to live in England where it rains pretty much daily. I’m sad to be going back to the States in a few days, but I know where my home is, and eventually, I will get to live here full-time.

Lightning strikes in the distance, and a few minutes later thunder booms, rattling Ash’s windows ever so slightly. When we were looking at places, he wasn’t sure about this place since it needed a lot of work before he got to it, but I convinced him. The rest of the apartment or—flat, as his family calls it, is renovated now. It’s our room that needs a bit more work. I wanted to make sure we got Parker’s room done first so he was comfortable living here since he and Ash will live here full-time. What really sold me is the fact it is just across town from his parents. Ash says when I move over full-time, he will buy us a house we can fill with kids. He’s still all about the baby making, and asking him to wear a condom wasn’t even in question, so he pulls out, and hates it, every time. Says it’s wasting his cum. I discussed my worries about being able to conceive, and he took me to the doctor who basically said stress is the leading factor of my lack of periods, which would make sense, considering. She also said that with my stress levels low, we should be able to when the time comes. So, I’m hopeful and so is he. I don’t think it ever occurred to Ash that there could be complications, he’s untouchable but forgets everyone around him isn’t.

I follow a single raindrop down the window until it combines with the rest of the water at the base.

For so long, I only focused on the storm and never gave much thought to what comes next. It’s easy to get lost in the loud thing, but it’s important to pay attention to the after because after. . . just might be the best part.

Like right now. I could have lived in the past, got stuck on what was and not what could be, but I’m glad I didn’t. Ash doesn’t realize it, but he’s the reason I’m here today. He’s the reason I am the person I am today. Those moments in my childhood I would pray to him and look at him when things were bad, to the long days in Blue Gate, the only constant, was him.

He’s my lifeline.

It’s a lot of pressure for one person to have, but he takes it in stride.

I have bad days. Days when I remember things I don’t want to and they cripple me. Days when I miss my grandpa more than the day before, and days when I hate the sight of my scars. Those are the days Ash loves me the hardest, like he promised when he proposed.

He has days when his memories and dreams bother him more than usual, those are the days I love him hardest—like I promised in our vows.

Our wedding was beautiful, on April fourth like we once agreed. Small, probably smaller than he wanted, but to me, it was perfect. His parents hosted it in their backyard, and it was beautiful. More than I could have ever asked for.

Sometimes I wonder if it will be weird, going into college a married woman, but I’m sure weirder things have happened, and just because it’s not the path others would have chosen for themselves, doesn’t mean it’s not the right path for me.

Speaking of the devil. The floor squeaks and he steps behind me, wrapping his warm arms around my body, a nice contrast to the chill of the room, but not before giving Todd a few pats. We agreed that Todd should stay here with him while I go to college. He’s a service dog, but the dorm life isn’t fair. Ash says that way he knows I’ll come back to him, but he’s delusional if he thinks he will ever get rid of me.

“What are you thinking about, Jailbird?”

That nickname. He likes to switch up, depending on his mood, from Jailbird, to babygirl, and now to my love, which I think is my new favorite. Jailbird usually means he’s in a goofy mood and wants to tease me.

“You, us, I guess.”

“What about us?”

“Everything.”

He spins me to face him and gives me a heartfelt smile.

“What?”

“You’re beautiful.”

I feel the blush already creeping up my neck, and I swat him. “Stop, you’re being cheesy again.”

His laugh is deep. “It’s true.” He presses his soft lips against my forehead. “Happy birthday, babygirl.”

My stomach flutters. “Thank you.” I had it in my head that when I turned eighteen a year ago, he wouldn’t be as into me because I wasn’t forbidden fruit, but that was a silly thought. I was never forbidden; I threw myself at him on that first day and never looked back.

Ash regards outside, and his lips flick up.

“What?” I turn in his arms to face the window to see what he is smiling about.

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