Page 99 of The Holiday Heartbreaker

He grinned. “Let’s see if I can find some parking.”

It proved to be pretty difficult to find a place to park, and they had to go against the curb all the way down at the end of Main Street. The town was bustling, full of people enjoying the carolers, the roasted chestnuts, the free apple cider.

And as they got out of the truck and started down the street, she had this wonderful realization that nobody there knew who they were. Nobody knew anything about her past, nobody knew that Brody wasn’t the kind of guy that was ever going to offer a commitment. Nobody knew that they weren’t together. Nobody knew that all they were doing was passing time in bed.

And this beautiful man, who stood out on this crowded street of people, could’ve been hers. As far as anyone here knew.

This was a moment out of time. A chance to get lost in fantasy.

Her heart clenched.

You know better than that.

She did. But was it so bad if underlying the fantasy, she kept it real? That she was real with herself about the fact that this would come to an end? She knew that it would. It would never be forever. Because it was always going to be too good to be real.

She wasn’t the kind of girl who got this life.

She had things. Wonderful things. The house at McCloud’s Landing. The job.

And Benny, most of all. The chance to be a mother when she had never really gotten to have one.

The chance to have family when she had been denied that in so many other ways in her life.

It might not be conventional, but she had. It wasn’t that she didn’t have a wonderful life filled with brilliant things. It was just...

For a while when she had been young, she had fantasized that a man could really love her. Forever.

It didn’t matter that Carter hadn’t been her fantasy. She could accept that now. She had liked Carter so much. She had a crush on him. She had loved him as much as she could have then, with everything she knew.

But she hadn’t really understood what she wanted from a sexual partner, from a life partner, from a husband, from the father of her child.

And while Carter was fine, with the perspective she had now, he wouldn’t be the top pick in any of those arenas. Too bad, since he was Benny’s father, and nothing could be done about that. But as for the rest... She didn’t want it back. She honestly hadn’t, ever since they had divorced. She had wanted certain things back. The simplicity, the house, the horses. But not him. Just the things that he represented, and that was what she realized right then.

He’d been a symbol. And that was all. Brody wasn’t a symbol. He was the only man she wanted. He was the man she wanted to be walking down the street with.

She was proud to be walking with him. So just for the moment, she wanted to pretend. And why not? This moment was like a snow globe. Safely ensconced in a magical world. Nothing outside it. Nothing that could touch it.

Once they stepped outside the bounds of it, reality would creep back in. But for now, it didn’t have to.

And it was like he read her mind, because suddenly he clasped his big, warm hand around hers. And they were holding hands like they were a real couple. Not just a couple of people having sex. She looked up at him, and he caught her eye, before looking away for a moment. She smiled, even though he wasn’t looking at her anymore.

They walked into the bakery, and the smell of sugar and butter filled her nose, and she smiled even wider. And there were cookies. Fresh-baked chocolate chip cookies.

“I think you need some,” she said.

“I have a favorite cookie,” he said. “Maybe I need to try some pie.”

“Okay. Fair. May I pose the question—why not cookies and pie?”

“Listen to your girlfriend,” the redheaded woman behind the counter said.

“I suppose I will,” Brody replied.

She knew that he was just playing along. Knew that he was just doing his best not to make it weird. She didn’t care. It made her feel like she was floating.

They sat down in the little shop with three pieces of pie and a little bag full of cookies that they were saving for later. “Which one is best?”

“So far,” he said, “as I’ve only tried one, the caramel apple.”

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