Page 32 of Bratva Bastard

“I would’ve, too,” he said, a sadness filling his eyes. “I wanted to ask you to marry me, but deep down, I think I knew you’d say no.”

“If you’d asked me a few days ago, I’d have probably said yes,” I mumbled.

Luiz creased his eyebrows, a mix of emotions. “What changed?”

I turned away, unable to face him. “Doesn’t matter. Regardless of what changed my mind, I’d have still felt the same. But you deserve to be with a woman whowantsto be with you. I’m just sad that woman wasn’t me.”

Ready to leave, I stood from the couch. God, how I’d miss that couch. It was so soft, cushy. But like the couch, it was time I said goodbye to Luiz.

“I’m sorry, too,” he said, standing to give me a final hug goodbye. “I do hope we could be friends again in the future. I’ll really miss you, Crissy.”

“Me, too,” I said, patting his back and pulling away. “I’ll see you around.”

But before I left, he added, “I don’t know what changed, but you seem a lot happier. More relaxed. Whatever it is, stick with it. I like seeing you happy.”

I smiled and turned away, feeling sadder than when I first got there, but also—in a strange way—happier.

Man, I felt like a pregnant woman with my emotions flying all over the place. Happy, sad, guilty, relieved… I was drowning in emotions. But what gripped my heart the most in that moment was dread.

Now I have to tell my mother I dumped Luiz.

As I drove home, I thought about our breakup. Maybe Luizhadfelt the same as me, and been settling when, deep down, he wanted more. Why else would he have been so calm and kind? Any other man would’ve yelled or thrown me out.

But not Luiz. He was a gentleman to the end. And when he told me to “stick with it,” I had a feeling it was his way of letting me know that he knew it was another man, and that he was giving me his blessing.

That, or I was reading too much into everything, and Luiz was totally oblivious, thinking I’d picked up a new hobby or something.

Yeah, a new hobby that included tons of sex.

I shook away the thought, preparing myself for talk number two. But before I could, I needed some time to figure out how I’d break the news.

Pulling up to Gemma’s house, I knocked on the door, not sure who I’d prefer to answer.

Gemma opened the door, motioning me inside. “Hey, Crissy,” she said, waddling to the kitchen to sit on a bar stool at the island. “Want a drink?”

I shook my head. “No, thanks. But do you think we could talk for a minute?”

Gemma nodded, taking a bite of the ice cream I’d clearly interrupted, as I told her about my breakup with Luiz.

“Wow, he took itsurprisinglywell,” she said, scooping another helping into the bowl and sliding it down to me. “Maybe he felt like you were more of a friend, too.”

I took a bite, savoring the sweet flavor of cookie dough in vanilla ice cream.Girl knows how to pick a snack!

“That’s what I thought. Either way, it doesn’t matter. It’s over, and I’m happy.”

Gemma grabbed another spoon, scooping a spoonful of ice cream at the same time as me, clinking our spoons together as she said, “Amen to that. Cheers.” And we ate our bites at the same time, giggling at the absurdity.

I paused for a moment, twirling the empty spoon in the air. “Any idea how to break the news to my mother? She was fond of Luiz. Probably more so than me.”

She took another bite and said, “Just tell her.” As if it were so easy.

“If I knewhowto tell her, I wouldn’t be here right now.” I groaned, shoving the spoon in the bowl and laying my head against the table. “She was always so insistent that I marry Luiz, even when I told her I didn’t want to. She’s going to flip out when I tell her I dumped him.”

“Why does she want you to marry him so bad?”

“Because…” I hesitated to tell her. It wasn’t that I was ashamed of being poor. It is what it is. But I don’t want anyone pitying my situation. “My dad disappeared when I was young, so my mom always had to work a lot to pay the bills. We grew up poor, and it was a major struggle, to say the least. She thinks if I marry Luiz, then I won’t have to worry about working so much and being poor. But she doesn’t understand that I’d rather be poor and be with a man I love, than marry a man for money.”

Gemma sighed, placing the spoon in the bowl with mine. Straightening herself, she took my hands in hers, looking me in the eyes.

---