I looked up at him, my heart clenching with sadness. “I’m going to miss you so much.”
He brushed his thumb over my cheek. “I’ll miss you too, but we’ll talk every day, and before you know it, I’ll be back in your arms.”
I leaned into his touch, wishing this moment could last forever. “I understand what this was,” I said. “I accepted reality last night. I don’t want you to feel like you owe me anything. I came into this situation with my eyes wide open. I know you have a life and you might even have a wife when you get home.”
“No.” He shook his head.
“Hey, don’t. I don’t want you to feel like you owe me anything. Like I said, I knew what I was getting into when we talked last night. Don’t make me any promises. I’ve come to terms with the fact I only got to have you one night. It’s a night I won’t forget.”
It was killing me to say the words, but I didn’t want him to feel like I was guilting him into anything. If he came back, great. If not, that was life.
When he didn’t protest and tell me not to worry, it hurt a little. He rubbed his thumb across the back of my hand. “I won’t make promises I can’t guarantee, but I am going to try to find a way back to you.”
I forced a smile though my heart felt like it was shattering in my chest. “When do you leave?” I asked.
“Tonight,” he answered with no enthusiasm. “I don’t want to go. This has seriously been the best week of my life.”
I smiled and touched his cheek. “Me too.”
“You’re just saying that,” he joked. “You’re here every day.”
“I am, but it’s so much better when I have someone to share it with. Someone that gets to see the beauty for the first time and genuinely appreciates life under the water.”
“I would think that’s pretty common here,” he said.
I shook my head. “Yes but experiencing it with you was different.”
“I’m glad it was a memorable experience for you,” he said. “You’ve changed my life, Shiloh. I know it sounds cheesy, but I have never really lived until you made me jump off that yacht. I’ve been gliding by on the surface with no real ups or downs. I’ve never experienced euphoria.”
I loved that I was able to bring all that to him, but it was also a little sad to think I opened his eyes to this way of living and he might choose to share it with someone else. “I should get dressed,” I said with sadness. “I’m sure you’ve got a lot to do to get ready for your departure.”
“I don’t want to go,” he whispered.
I kissed him. “But you have to. You’re not free.”
“Yet,” he said. “I’m not free yet.”
I got off his lap and looked down at him. It might be the last time I got to see him. I wanted to remember him smiling and sexy wearing just a pair of shorts. He reached out and grabbed my hand. I held it for a few seconds before I pulled away and went back inside.
I dressed and went back upstairs. Penelope was in the kitchen wearing a pink satin robe and her hair piled on her head. It looked like she’d been crying.
Ryder looked just as bummed. He was sitting at the bar with a cup of coffee in front of him. Archer was still on the deck. The sadness in the room was palpable.
I didn’t know what to say to break the tension. I figured it was best to rip the bandage off and get going. “Ryder, are you ready? You’re my ride.”
“Give me a minute,” he said.
I left them alone and went back to the deck to say goodbye to Archer. I told myself to keep my emotions in check. It might be the last time I saw him. I didn’t want him to remember me as a blubbering mess.
Archer was standing near the railing, staring out at the ocean. He looked up as I approached, his expression unreadable. “Leaving so soon?” he asked.
“I have to,” I said, my voice barely above a whisper. “But I just wanted to say goodbye.”
He turned to face me, his eyes dark and intense. “I don’t want you to go,” he said, his voice low and rough.
“I know,” I said, my heart aching. “But you have your life, and I have mine.”
“I will come back,” he said.