Page 84 of Heir Of Sun And Moon
“Nothing new, I’m afraid,” my father sighs as he taps his finger on the edge of the table. My mother smiles slightly, her body tensing in concern.
“I’m sure he’s alright,” I say quietly, though I also have my own anxiety over where he is and what he’s doing at the forefront of my mind. My father nods in agreement before shifting the conversation again. We chat about the upcoming Equinox Competition and the past few Flame Ceremonies before I inhale a rather large yawn, which has my parents practically begging me to go to bed.
Once I get to my room, I open the balcony doors, letting in the warm summer breeze as I wash up and change for bed. Sliding into my cool sheets, my head is heavy as it sinks into my pillow. It feels like my future is dangling in front of me but I have two different threads to pull on. One will bring me a certain type of security, and happiness to Daje—one of the very few people I truly care about—but it will be at a personal sacrifice. The other will leave me the most fulfilled, but it will mean that I’m alone in that satisfaction.
My eyes drift closed, and the last thought that crosses my mind is how much easier this would all be if I could just make progress on my experiments. If I could find something tangible to fix what is broken, then perhaps everything else would fall into place.
Chapter Forty-Three: Rhea
BythetimeIfinish with my shower, Immie has brought food to the room and confirmed with Flynn that Bella is thriving in the gardens, enjoying the attention of a few children. I sit on the edge of the perfectly made bed with crisp white linens, staring out the window at the people who look to be setting up for a celebration. Today is the Summer Solstice, I realize with a jolt. My finger drags along the gold bracelet that Alexi gave me so many years ago. I remember the night he gifted it to me in exquisite detail, a small smile pulling on my lips. But as I watch the townspeople outside of my window, my mind starts to wander. Edging in are my uncle’s words about how he wanted to spend my birthday this year, and I can’t help but squeeze my fists in response. He is so vile and foul, to expect that sort of relationship with me—from me.
I sit in silence, lost in my thoughts, until Flynn comes out from his shower a short while later. He’s changed his clothing—though they still resemble his guard uniform. The black-on-black ensemble might have made anyone else look morose or drained of color, but he manages to glow against the dark color of his short-sleeve tunic and form-fitting pants. My eyes are immediately drawn to his tan arms, the muscles there impeccably well-defined. Silence builds—like a stone wall going up brick by quiet brick as he sits down next to me.
“We need to talk,” he says at my side. His fingers trail lightly through my wet hair, just barely brushing against me. I turn and face him fully, our knees grazing. “I need to tell you something, and all I ask is that you believe me when I say that I haven’t lied about anything that I’ve said to you.” He reaches out his hand to hold mine, our fingers interlacing.
“Okay…” I hesitate, an imaginary fist tightening around my heart.
“My home and my family are in the Mage Kingdom.” His eyes stay locked on mine, his hold on my hand tight in anticipation of my reaction.
When my mind finally catches up, air rushes out of my lungs as I gape at him. My heart skips a beat as my thoughts start crashing into each other, a tangled web of confusion and questions—and hurt. I finally stammer, “You’re—you’re mage?”
He nods slowly as his eyes soften and he continues, “It’s why I was able to avoid the blood oath. I healed the wound with my magic before I said the binding words.”
The blood oath didn’t take.It’s what he had told me, and I suppose that wasn’ttechnicallya lie. I remember the feeling of doubt that had risen within me at those words, but with everything that happened after, I had completely forgotten to bring it up to him again. I should have trusted my instincts and made it a priority to have him explain. I never thought he would lie, aboutanything,and that naivety was coming back to haunt me—Wait, hehealedthe wound?
“Your magic can heal too?” I ask incredulously. I had practicallybeggedhim to let me save him, to use my magic to stop his bleeding so that he would live. And he washidinghis ability to heal himself the whole time? Why would he lie about that? My stomach feels like it’s twisting in on itself with his revelation. Was heusingme for something?
“I can use it to heal”—realizing how that sounds, his eyes widen—“every mage can, but I need to be able to concentrate fully for a few seconds in order to wield it. I was so focused on you and getting you away from there—away from him—that I was only able to start partially healing the wound.”
I think back on that moment, how my magic mended himand then some,more quickly than it had with Bella.Because he was already healing. I feel panic start to build within me, betrayal trying to curl its way around my mind. I pull my hand from his as my body starts shaking.
“What do you want to know, Rhea? Please ask me, and I’ll tell you anything—everything,” he begs, moving closer to me on the bed.
My thoughts tumble inside of me, but I don’t know where to begin. He’s been lying to me this whole time, and that realizationhurts. It makes me question every word—every declaration he made in that tower. If lying about something so huge was soeasyfor him, were the smaller private moments between us easy to fake as well? I struggle to sift through everything I want to ask and instead just blurt out, “Why are you in the King’s Guard for the Mortal Kingdom if you are mage?”
“I did it for my family. That wasn’t a lie. They needed me to join, so I did.” His words are sincere, but I don’t know if he’s lying to me. Or I suppose, I don’t know if he is telling me the entire truth. He reaches his hand back out to reclaim one of my own, but I keep them fisted in my lap. He swallows roughly, dropping the outstretched hand to the bed. “What else?”
“Have you used magic around me?” And if he did, was it obvious? Did I completely miss the signs?
“Yes,” he replies with a small nod of his head. “The biggest thing I did was heal your back after the king hurt you.” My mind is so muddled by my racing thoughts that I have a hard time recalling the memory that he’s speaking of. “But more recently was when we went into the river. I protected the bags so the items inside wouldn’t get wet.”
My eyes widen. I hadn’t even questioned the items being dry later that night. I just— I didn’t think. I was so preoccupied with my own feelings and thoughts that I didn’t see what was right in front of me.
“And I also used it to help you when I pulled your unconscious body from the water. You were passed out for this, but I healed my arrow wound as well,” he adds on.
My gods, the arrow.A little bit of guilt bleeds into my unease at the thought that I had forgotten he hadalsobeen hit with an arrow.
“Why? Why didn’t you tell me sooner? Why are you telling me now?” I ask as I study his expression, my frustration growing with each word.
“Fear,” he answers honestly, running the hand that had reached out for me through his hair and holding the strands there. “At first, I was afraid that you would tell the king. I didn’t know you or the truth of your relationship with him that well yet. You know how he feels about those from the Mage Kingdom.” And I did; it’s part of the reason why I never told him about my own magic. “Then I was afraid that telling you would mean that I’d lose you. That you’d be so angry with me for lying that you’d want me to leave.” He hangs his head, his hand dropping from his hair as he looks up at me. Even with his hair ruffled and his expression solemn, he is still the most beautiful man I’ve ever seen.
“And why are you telling menow?” I ask again, appeased slightly by the sincerity in his words. “There were quiet moments on our trek here where you could have told me, Flynn.”
“Because I knew you were hurting and I didn’t want to add to that. You wouldn’t talk with me about what you were feeling, and I didn’t want to push it. I also wanted to give you the choice,” he confides. His voice is low, but his assumption that I have a choice only causes my emotions to heat again. “If you continue on with me, we will pass through the Spell and cross over into the Mage Kingdom. But if you would rather not, you can stay here. I trust this town and Immie to help keep you safe and settle into a new life.” My heart drops into my stomach at the thought. “And as much as it would kill me to leave you, I would honor your wishes. I want you to know that. When I said that you have total power over me, that includes if it leads to my own destruction.Whateveryou want, I will do it.”
“What Iwant?” I whisper, staring at him. All my emotions, ones brought on by his confessions and ones I’ve kept buried beneath the surface for too long, begin to rise until I feel like I’m going to burst. A hoarse laugh scrapes up my throat though there’s nothing funny about this moment. “Youliedto me. Youpretendedto be somebody else, what, to lead me out of the Mortal Kingdom?”
My hands dive into my hair, and I find a kernel of calm in the storm swirling through my mind at the familiar way I grip the strands right at the root. Flynn tries to speak, but it’s like a buzzing in my ears.
