Page 9 of Devoured

“She’s 19.”

“I’m the one that dug up the information about her. So I know her birthday is on Thursday. If you’re so caught up on the fact that she’s a teenager, that’ll change before the end of next week. So your excuse is moot.”

“It doesn’t matter. She probably won’t forgive me for kicking her out. And she definitely won’t forgive me for what I did last night.”

“You said you didn’t do anything. And I believe you. But regardless of what you choose to tell her, the worst that can happen is that she tells you to fuck off and leave her alone.”

“Which she should,” I said.

“But the best thing that can happen? She forgives you. For all your very many flaws.”

I laughed.

“And then you live happily ever after.”

I laughed again. Happily ever afters were meant for princes. Penny had said I made her feel like a Disney princess. But I was no prince. I was pretty sure that I was the villain.

Chapter 3

Wednesday

Each day was worse than the last. When I found out that Penny was only 19, I’d told myself that she was better off without me. But for a few hours when I’d had the plan to see Mr. Pruitt, I’d had hope that I could win Penny back. That I could be enough. That I could be better. But now?

I’d been right the first time.

Penny was better off without me.

And I was in hell.

I couldn’t seem to focus in class. My lectures were all over the place. And they were always greeted by confused looks on my students’ faces. If I didn’t get my act together, I knew the dean would be calling me. I could kiss my fresh start goodbye. Not that it felt like a fresh start anymore. It was more like torture.

But I couldn’t think about the students I was letting down or about getting fired right now. Because today was Wednesday. I got to see Penny three times a week. And on those days all I could think about was her.

Ian said that we could live happily ever after. But I knew the truth. I’d been so determined to win her back. But I’d fucked everything up.

I wasn’t a knight in shining armor. And Penny was better off without me. There was only one answer here. One painful answer that I’d let settle around me.

I was going to let her go. I had to let her go.

But on Mondays, Wednesdays, and Fridays we still got to breathe the same air. I still got to stare at her in class. We could still be close. I’d give anything to be closer. Just one touch…

Stop.

Fucking stop it.

I walked into the coffee shop where Penny and I first met. I made a habit of coming here every morning, hoping to run into her. I wasn’t sure for what purpose. Maybe seeing her outside of class would feel more like us. Maybe I’d be able to find the strength to figure out a way to bring us back together.

But every day I went to the coffee shop, she wasn’t there. It almost seemed like she was avoiding it. Trying to get over what we had.

I should have been grateful.

But it just made everything worse.

I had to let her go. But I didn’t want to.

Someone behind me cleared their throat.

I blinked. I hadn’t realized the line in front of me had dissipated. Everyone was waiting for me to order. But I didn’t actually want coffee. I just wanted Penny. I stepped out of the line. God, I just needed Penny.

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