Page 45 of The Royal Gauntlet

I observe the faces around the room. Sybil raises their hand first, followed by Estelle. Zara’s eyebrows tilt apologetically before she raises her hand. I can hear the groan of the wood on my chair as Essos grips it. It’s not a surprise when Kai stands behind his wife and raises his hand. I can’t say I blame him but remembering how Galen beat him bloody during his trial, I’m still stunned that he agrees we should bring this man back.

Cat makes a show of putting both hands on the table, and Xavier mimics her, leaning forward in his seat.

I haven’t decided how I want to vote, but I don’t have to decide. There are eleven of us in the room, and Dion brings the count to six in favor. The air is suddenly suffocating, and I think someone turned off the oxygen, because I’m not able to breathe. One of my worst nightmares is coming true.

The wood of my chair splinters as Essos crushes it in his grip. “I am the only one who knows where the dagger is. We don’t have to do this.” His hot breath stirs the baby hairs on my neck.

I turn to face him. “That wouldn’t be very democratic of us,” I point out, trying to bury the queasy feeling working its way through my body.

“I would do it for you, love.”

I reach out and cup his cheek, and he leans into my touch. “I know you would, but I think we have to do it. I might have voted for it too.”

“Do you honestly believe we should? After everything he did to you? Did tous? I am willing to look past it, if it is what you truly desire, but I don’t think it’s right.”

“It’s the best option,” I tell him, the small quake in my voice betraying what I really think.

* * *

As we’re gettingundressed later, Essos grabs my wrists, stilling my hands as I’m buttoning up my night shirt. I look up at him, confused.

“I need you to trust me,” he tells me. Essos’s chest is bare, and I want to reach forward and run my hands over him and pull him against me, but the look in his blue eyes gives me pause. He’s deadly serious about whatever is on his mind.

“I do trust you. I’ve never not trusted you,” I reassure him. He gives me a pointed look, a wry twist to his lips. “Since getting my memories back, I’ve nevernottrusted you,” I amend.

“I have to go somewhere, and I don’t know how long I’ll be gone. I’m going to try to make it quick.”

I drop onto the bed, trying to keep my posture erect. Essos doesn’t hesitate to cup my face so I can’t look away from him.

“Can I ask where and why?”

Essos kisses my forehead, long and hard, before meeting my eyes. “You can ask, but I can’t tell you. I promise to explain when I get back, but I made a promise to someone else, and I have to honor that.”

I get it, I do, but I crawl away from him to get to the headboard, hurt that there is still so much that happened that I’m not privy to yet.

He eyes me warily as he moves around the room to climb onto his side of the bed. “Are you upset?” He tugs back the covers so we can both nestle under them.

I slide across the cool sheets so I’m against him. I’ve been warmer than usual lately, but that doesn’t mean I don’t crave Essos’s touch. I fold against him, slotting into the same spots I used to fit, one arm folded against his chest, one leg wrapping around his, my small bump cradled between us.

“No, I’m not upset. I’m just not excited about being apart again. I feel like I’ve just gotten you back, and now you’re leavingagain. I’m not even allowed to know where you’ll be. What if you’re in danger and I don’t know it?” I hate how emotion clogs my voice, and I have to close my eyes to stop the tears that threaten to spill.

“I can assure you that I won’t be in any danger. I will come back to you whole. This—what I’m going to do—is to help us. I wouldn’t do it if I didn’t think it would help.” Essos strokes my shoulder with one hand while his other grips my wrist.

“I trust you,” I assure him, before plunging the room into darkness.

CHAPTER14

Essos is gone when I wake. I have a vague memory of a brief kiss on my lips before he departed, but my mind tumbled back into my nightmares too easily. Because of that, rising for real is harder than I hoped. I spend several minutes staring at the indent Essos left in our bed.

A gentlewoofhas me looking to my other side, where Dave is happily thumping his tail. He doesn’t hesitate to jump onto the bed and shower my face with kisses.

“Dave,” I giggle, trying to push him off. He finally settles down next to me. “Did Daddy send you to watch me?” I ask, rewarding him with scratches behind his ears and under his chin. Curled in the cradle of my lap, Waffles lazily turns his head toward the dog before resettling, too comfortable to move and too used to Dave’s antics.

Dave sheepishly lowers his head, the closest I’ll get to an acknowledgement from him. I’ve missed my furry companions, but I’ve wanted to make sure that Cat and Zara had the physical comfort. I had Essos, but they didn’t have anyone but each other.

“Not just Dave,” Cat says from the doorway. She’s leaning against it, watching me carefully. Just past her, I see Shadow sitting patiently. It makes me miss Spot, but I know he’s safe with my parents in the mortal realm, and I know they’re safe because of him.

“Are you just going to stand there, or are you two also getting into bed?”

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