Page 19 of Pregnant by the Texan
“Wait, Aaron,” she whispered.
He kissed away her protest, which had sounded faint and halfhearted anyway. He ran his fingers through her hair, combing it out, feeling more pins falling as the locks tumbled down her back.
“You look pretty with your hair down,” he whispered.
She turned, maybe to answer. Instead, he kissed her and stopped any conversation.
“I want to love you all night. I will soon, Stella. I want to kiss and hold you,” he whispered when the kiss subsided.
She moaned softly as he twisted free another button, his hand sliding beneath her blouse to cup her breast.
She gasped, kissing him, clinging to him. He wanted to pick her up, carry her to bed, but he suspected she would end their kisses and tell him good-night.
She finally stepped back. “We were headed to the door.”
He combed long strands of brown hair from her face. “I’ll go, but sometime soon, you’ll want me to stay. I’ll see you in the morning.” He started out the door and turned back. “Don’t worry. If you can’t sleep, call me and we’ll talk.”
She smiled. “Thanks, Aaron. Thanks for being you.”
He studied her, wondering about her feelings, wondering where they were headed, because he could imagine her sticking to the decisions she had already made involving their future. “Just don’t forget I’m half the parent equation.”
“I couldn’t possibly forget,” she said, standing in the open doorway with him.
“Good night,” he said, brushing a light kiss on her lips and going to his suite.
When he got there, he went straight to the kitchen and poured himself a glass of whiskey. Setting the bottle and his drink on the kitchen table, he pulled out his billfold. As he sat, he took a long drink. He opened the wallet and looked at a picture of Paula holding Blake. Aaron’s insides knotted.
“I love you,” he whispered. “I miss you. I’m going to be a dad again. I never thought that would happen. It doesn’t take away one bit of love from either of you. That’s the thing about love—there’s always more.”
He felt the dull pain that had been a part of him since losing Paula and Blake. “This isn’t the way it was supposed to be. I know, if you were here, you’d tell me to snap out of it, to marry her and be the best dad possible.” He paused a moment and stared at the photo. “Paula, Blake, I love you both. I miss you.”
He dropped his billfold and put his head in his hands, closing his eyes tightly against the hurt. He got a grip on his emotions, wiped his eyes and took a deep breath. He was going to be a dad again. In spite of all the tangled emotions and Stella’s rejection of his proposal, he felt a kernel of excitement. He would be a dad—it was a small miracle. A second baby of his own. How would he ever persuade Stella to marry him? She wanted love and marriage.
He could give her marriage. He would have to try to persuade her to settle for that. Just marriage. A lot of women would jump at such a chance. One corner of his mouth lifted in a grin and he held up his drink in a toast to an imaginary companion. “Here’s to you, Stella, on sticking to your convictions and placing a premium on old-fashioned love. You’ll be a good mother for our child.”
So far, in working with her, Stella had proved to be levelheaded, practical and very intelligent. That gave him hope.
He finished his drink and poured one more, capping the bottle. Then he stood up and put it away. He started to pocket his billfold, but he paused to open it and look once more at the picture of his baby son. As always, he felt a hollow emptiness, as if his insides had been ripped out. Now he was going to have another baby—another little child, his child. It was a miracle to him, thrilling.
Stella had to let him be a part of his child’s life. It was a chance to be a dad again, to have a little one, a son or daughter to raise. In that moment, he cared. He wanted Stella to marry him or let him into the life of his child in some way. He wasn’t giving up a second child of his. One loss was too many. He sure as hell didn’t plan to lose the second baby. He would have to court Stella until she just couldn’t say no. He had to try to win her love.
As much as he hurt, he still had to smile. Stella wouldn’t go for any insincere attempt to fake love or conjure it up where it didn’t exist.
He had to make her fall in love with him and that might not be so easy when he didn’t know whether he could ever really love her in return.
* * *
The next morning Stella was supposed to have breakfast with Aaron, but he called and told her to go ahead because he’d be late. A few minutes after she’d settled in and ordered, she watched him cross the dining room to her table. He was dressed for a day of helping the cleanup effort in jeans, an R&N sweatshirt and cowboy boots. Even in the ordinary clothes, he looked handsome and her heart began racing at her first glimpse of him. The father of her baby. She was beginning to adjust to the idea of being pregnant even though she had slept little last night.
“Sorry. You shouldn’t have waited. Did you order from the menu or are you going with the buffet?”
“I’ve ordered from the menu and I didn’t wait,” she said, smiling.
“I’ll get the buffet and be right back.”
While they ate, Aaron sipped his coffee. “So, did you sleep well last night?” he asked.
“Fine,” she replied, taking a dainty bite of yellow pineapple.
